Ok. Some back story. I was born into the JW thing. So was my dad and mom. I was good, didn't comment very often and hated going out and preach but I was good. I started having doubts around 17, but I had no one to voice my doubts to. My mom had quit going a couple years ago, but I was home schooled with my 3 other siblings meaning not a whole lot of time with mom to talk about my thoughts. at 18 I got a job where I was around "worldly" people. I made a friend, someone I could finally talk to about my doubts. about 3-4 months after I voiced my doubts I told my dad I didn't believe any of it anymore. he was going to kick me out but my mom talked him down. None of my "friends" from the KH talk to me anymore, or when they did it'd be "oh haven't seen you at the hall recently". Nothing beyond that.
About a year later I moved out and bought a house. I have some nice things and a steady job, but I still feel alone. Every time I talk about how I was raised they look at me funny. I just feel like no one really understands. Never had a relationship my dad shot down every attempt I made at one, he always said that I wasn't ready for those feelings yet. Now I'm just lost. Don't really know what I'm doing anymore, I feel like an outsider everywhere I go, and I feel like no one could ever understand me because I don't understand me.
Sorry if I bored you but any help would be nice.