Wish me all the best

by LevelThePlayingField 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • LevelThePlayingField
    LevelThePlayingField

    So I called in to my local Walgreens pharmacy to get my blood pressure medicine refilled. I go to the pharmacy to pick it up and they tell me that the doctor has denied filling it saying to them, "prescription refill not appropriate". I asked them what that means and they say you'll have to contact your doctor on that, sorry.

    So I drive away puzzled as to why and then it dawns on me. He's not filling it because I was supposed to have a blood test done to see how my liver is functioning and I haven't done that since the end of November and now it's the beginning of March.

    Oh, and I need to let you in on this little secret part of it all. He ordered the liver test because I have a drinking problem. I drink about a half of a fifth every day (375ml) to deal with things. I told him I would quit back at the end of November 2016, but that never happened. Still drinking about 4 times a week. Now he's blocked my RX refill probably because I didn't get the blood test done? He wants me to get the blood work done and this is his way of checking up on me?

    And yeah, I drank today again. BUT, now I am determined not to touch the bottle again! This time I really mean it. So my plan is to go in around the end of the month and get the blood test done and see my doc and just tell him the real truth. By then I will be 3 weeks in with no drinking. I have been drinking every day for the most part for the last two years.

    I basically began drinking to deal with waking up to TTATT. When I found out about the UN thing I drank that night heavily and since then to cope.

    My doc checked the levels in August 2016 and my liver was irritated, fatty liver, but no damage. And since then I have cut back at least a little from everyday to about 4-5 times a week.

    Any of you who have a drinking problem want to join me in starting today (3/3/17) on not drinking any more? We could keep bumping the thread up with our weekly updates. The more support the better. I'm a little anxious to say the least, but last week I went for 4 days and not a drop and the week before that I went 3 days.

  • GrreatTeacher
    GrreatTeacher

    I agree that you need to tell the doctor the truth. Even if you don't last that entire three weeks without drinking, he needs to know. Since alcohol IS a drug it could have effects when mixed with other medication.

    Also, he/she might be able to provide resources to help reduce/quit drinking. I wonder if a referral to a therapist might even be helpful? You've had your life turned upside down, so you could probably use the support of a professionally-trained listening ear.

    Look, you're doing great. If you're able to cut back then you're moving in the right direction. What you really need are coping skills and alcohol is not teaching them, even if it, admittedly, helps you to forget about your troubles temporarily.

    Just don't get down on yourself if you don't make the entire three weeks dry. Quitting is often a two-steps-forward, one-step-back deal, and putting other coping skills in place is key for that continued improvement. So, use your doctor as a resource and make sure you get that blood pressure medicine refilled!

    Best of luck!

  • LevelThePlayingField
    LevelThePlayingField

    Thank you GreatTeacher. My wife takes the same blood pressure medicine and she has a mega dose of them, so I plan on taking hers in the mean time.

  • ILoveTTATT2
    ILoveTTATT2

    Hi LTPF, alcohol is a depressant, it makes you numb. You´re obviously in pain. So you need something to numb it, but alcohol´s a bad way to do it. What about taking care of other aspects of your health that will have the added benefit of relaxing you? A brisk walk out in the open 1 hour a day will do wonders!! Also, try to eat healthy, sleep enough, have sex... (relaxes most everyone heheh)... schedule a massage... have hot baths... all those things help!!

    Also, it´s a good idea to see a good counsellor that has experience both in cult exiting AND substance abuse. Scientific research shows that cognitive behavioral therapy is one of the best way to combat substance abuse.

    Best of luck!

  • JeffT
    JeffT

    I've said this before, but this is a good place to say it again: I'm an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink since August 29, 2005. Best 11 years of my life. I now work in a 28 day recovery center. I may be able to help find counselors/programs etc wherever you live. PM me if you want. Alcoholism is a disease, not a moral failure. It is quite capable of killing you, which is why your doctor wants you to come in and get your tests done. It is probable that if you go there and tell him the truth, you won't say anything he doesn't already know. I went in for a physical after I got sober, one of the docs first questions was "how much did you really drink?" When I told him he said "I knew you were lying to me."

    Get some help and good luck to you.

  • Chook
    Chook

    Leveltheplayingfield

    i can go for long periods without a drink , but when I drink I can't or find it very difficult to stop. ( like the old saying 1 to many and 100 not enough) I think man has had this problem a long time ,Noah and Lot were thirsty men at times. You can PM if you need a hearing ear, I have my demons with medical marijuana, I find it better than losing my memory when drunk. I've can get little bit ADHD which I find the cannabis settles. If you can find a good support friend outside of your household they will be invaluable. As humans we are trying to live with childhood emotional pain , disappointments from church , our own failings, we can only heal when we love ourselves . It's only us that we can change and ONLY if you want change. I can't say I will never drink again because I would lying to myself ( based on my track record) . Just a day at a time trying to work out the most peaceful course.

    cheers

  • Anders Andersen
    Anders Andersen

    @LTPF,

    Kudos to you for calling for help and at the same time encouraging and helping others!

    There is no shame in asking and accepting help. On the contrary, it takes strength to acknowledge that we're not capable of doing everything by ourselves.

    Good luck and much strenght to you!

  • The Searcher
    The Searcher

    I wish you success as you tackle your problem, LTPF.

    Many of us here are on a similar road to yours, dealing with struggles of one kind or another - even if we can't/won't discuss it.

    You're definitely not alone, so never feel as if you are.

  • redpilltwice
  • scratchme1010
    scratchme1010

    LevelThePlayingField, thank you for sharing this information about you. You may not know it, but you may be helping a lot of people with similar problems, especially many ex-JWs who may feel shame for having certain problems with drinking and other things, and are unable to talk about it.

    As JWs we're told that if we live we're going to become useless, lost people. Sometimes many internalize those wrong ideas and feel unable to seek help or talk about having issues, afraid of hearing an "I told you so" from the JWs.

    I don't have a drinking problem, but I know of people who seek professional help instead of relying on their own will power to stop. It is not just a simple preference and liking alcohol; sometimes your body develops a chemical dependence on alcohol, which is why it's not as simple as stopping.

    It's great that you have resolved to stop, and I do not want to discourage you from doing so, but I'd suggest you that instead of a buddy, look for a doctor, clinic, or any professional, including mental health professional, who can properly assist you.

    I think it's important, especially if you can clearly point at the reason why you started the drinking. Guess what, the way you feel about TTATT is still going to be there, loud and clear as soon as you stop drinking. And what are you going to do once you stop? How prepared are you to face life without relying on drinking? Your fears, worries and other things that drew you to drink will remain and/or come back if you just stop drinking.

    If you want to be successful, I'd suggest to no just deal with the effect of you drinking, but also deal with eh cause, that is, what made you start drinking in the first place. I wish you the best, and I hope you remain sober for your mental and physical health.