Sample Disassociation Letter please?
Sailor, just curious if that got them to avoid making the public announcement? And with what result? Does everyone still shun you/treat you as DFd? In what area do you live?
Thx! for sharing your experience.
DOC, I live on the Northeast Coast of the USA. I am not shunned. JWs are polite and cordial when we cross paths in town. We exchange pleasantries and family news. I recently had a lovely 2-hour-long chat with my former P.O. at our retinal specialist's office. This blew my mind. He had to have seen my letter!
That said, I am clearly on a do-not-call list. They skip my door when in the neighborhood. I don't call them, and they don't call me. I like it that way!
I walked away in 2011, and resigned in 2015. You can see my letter posted on this forum.
If you put your letter in bullet points make sure they are placed before you state you want to be DA. This will guarantee that they read the bullet points. You might want to use no more than half a dozen bullet points for your entire letter with the request for DA at the end.
Here's an example:
- Because you have defamed Jehovah with continuous false prophecies.
- Because you have allowed pedophiles to remain in good standing in your congregations.
- Because you have taken away the most precious time of our children's and adult lives in order to serve an organization.
I have decided to disassociate from your organization.
Just send them two scriptures , Luke 21:8 and Duteronomy 32: what ever verse talks about being a false prophet. Then keep it short and sweet don't mention your dissociation until the end and keep it vague so they have to read the whole letter. I would also touch on the child molestation coverups and say how gods one and true religion wouldn't treat victims this way!
they won't pay attention to any of the reasons you put down
I have one that doesn't give an actual reason for leaving, because the reason doesn't matter to anybody but you. No need to tell them why.Doesn't matter.
This letter just says I didn't meet the baptismal criteria so the baptism isn't valid.
This is done for legal reasons. It protects you in case you are harassed, defamed or visited afterwards: baptism nullification letter
My suggestion: Don't do it. Don't play their game. Ignore their rules. Simply don't see the upside with the strategy. Just distance yourself. They will figure it out soon enough and shun you anyway.
DOC - IMO, your opinion stinks (*like assholes) -- or rather, the pejorative way you refer of those who choose not to DA or who don't share your thoughts about DA -- stinks.Oh, you mean like the way people here portray those that disassociate as weak and giving into the the Borg? I normally just encourage people in situations like this to do what they want and tell them to ignore the haters, but this time I decided to come back with the contempt shown for those that do disassociate or want to. It stings, no? That's how I felt when I wanted to disassociate, and decision I made, and I struggled to get any support from my ex-dub friends. It sucks to want to do what you want to do and have everyone tell you not to when all you're doing is looking for support. The OP didn't ask for opinions on her decision, just how to write the letter.
I did refer to DA as "playing by their game" because it is outlined in the JW Elders' Book of Rules.
Why does that matter? It is a way out permanently. It effectively ends the game. It isn't something they want. They want to continue to "encourage" you. Families will want to keep doing the same. Jehovah's Witnesses can't stand it when they have to stop being able to put in their not so subtle jabs and can't talk to you anymore. Talking to others, "witnessing" is the name of their game. DA'ing puts a bullet in it and there is no more game playing. Why do you give them so much power as to worry about them using the word disassociation? Take that word and make it work for you, if you want. If you don't, that's fine too, but I certainly wouldn't want to give them so much power that they keep me from being able to end the game completely just because they took ownership of a word.
And, as many here know and/or have had it happen personally, when the Eldubs come calling on you (esp if they suspect apostasy) you will most definitely be asked if you still believe "the GB/F&DS are God's representatives today"? Because if you deny the GB, you have DA yourself from the bOrg.
So you prove my point. By not disassociating and ending contact, you're subject to them calling on you, whenever they so choose, therefore you're still playing their game.
There are those here who have posted that they later regretted their decision to DA.
A fair point, just as there are people that have regretted their decision to fade. Again there is fear that prevents people from taking such a permanent stand. If that's not for you, great. If a person is brave enough to do it, celebrate with them instead of discouraging them. They've probably been through hell just to make that decision and don't need you adding to it.
Like I said, I don't go on threads where people want to fade and tell them to disassociate or else they will have to continue playing the JW game. I don't get why people feel it is their place to interject on threads where people want to disassociate and to try to shame them into not doing so because they're playing their game, which comes off just as pejorative. THAT is why I said what I said. I'm sick of the way people are treated for wanting to disassociate, as if they're somehow doing it wrong by finally making probably one of the first and most important decisions for themselves apart from the cult. I've seen the looks from ex-dubs that have found out that we disassociated at times, like we're weak for taking that step or must have been sad and pathetic and needed it. Fuck that. We should celebrate people that get out no matter how they do it. I said what I said here to illustrate the way people like you and others make people feel that disassociate. Instead we should be cheerleaders for others.
So, from now on when I see the tired and played out "don't play by their rules" I'm going to post the above because it takes balls to disassociate and if people are going to characterize one that decides to disassociate a certain way we might as well do the same for those that choose not to, right. Or we could just be supportive of what another chooses to do on the way out. Nah, let's decide why it must be that people disassociate and point them out as doing something weak and try to discourage them from doing it.
Or we could just be supportive of what another chooses to do on the way out. ~ dubstepped
I'm with ya there. It's kinda like the 1st Amendment -- I may not like what you said, but I'll defend your right to say it.
remember me when you get into your kingdom !
I was baptised as a child and since then, I have learned either information that was purposefully hidden from me, or teachings that have, since then, changed drastically. To make a long story short: The watchtower today is far from what I got baptised for.
If you want to know why exactly I am leaving, feel free to come by or watch one of the Youtube videos I will do shortly on that matter.
Regardless, let it be known that I am no longer a Jehovah's Witness.
To write it all out is to assume they are interested and willing to undertake reasonable debate. Nothing in a kh is ever debated but a written account as to 'why' will only play into their legalistic Pharisees way of 'arrangements' giving them further that what they do or say is important. But each must do what suits them.
However I am ever confused on this need to resign in writing. I was baptised and never received a card or letter of welcome nor did any of my family. So why do the wts require a written notice of departure? would any of the trolls like to comment please?