Can I just say what a cruel joke standarized tests are. Especially ones for English Teachers...
I had to roust myself at 6 am so I could drag my ass to the "TESTING CENTER OF DOOM" (ok I added that last part), to take my Praxis II exam. Three weeks ago I forked over $185 for the privilege of spending two hours questioning my every instinct with regards to the English language and literature and cursing my former teachers for not emphasising the allusion and adverbial clauses. I half expected the exam to be printed on a silk spun bubble sheet, or at least a helper monkey. BUT NO! They don't even give you a damn pencil with a spiffy ETS logo on it. What exactly am I paying for?
Content like this I guess...
Read the following passage and answer the following questions. Be sure to completely fill your answer on the answer sheet.
The Garden of Love
I went to the Garden of Love
And saw what I never had seen
A Chapel was built in the midst
Where I used to play on the green.
And the gates of this Chapel were shut
And "Thou shalt not" writ over the door
So I turn'd to the Garden of Love
That so many sweet flowers bore.
And I saw it was filled with graves
And tomb-stones where flowers should be
And Priests in black gowns were walking their rounds
And binding with briars my joys and desires.
In this poem is the author
A) Expressing himself/herself as an angst ridden hormonal teen
B) Deconstructing post-feminist rhetorical constraints
C) Gassy
D) Using heroic couplets
In line 7 what does the word "the" mean?
A) The world is going to end tomorrow
B) You are never going to pass this test
C) You really shouldn't have made fun of your 9th grade English teacher spending so much time on subject verb agreement
D) Run Away! Run Away!
Grapes of Wrath.
Honestly--is this what defines a good teacher?
I can spot iambic pentameter at 20 paces, but I am always a bit confused by hyperbole. Should I just give up this whole teaching game right now? Or until I can successfully use gerunds in a participle clause? And stop writing in sentence fragments?
The whole experience kind of makes you want to stab yourself with a number 2 soft lead pencil.
Don't pop my bubble sheet!
by joannadandy 9 Replies latest jw friends
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joannadandy
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joannadandy
SFJim...while fun, I was thinking more along the lines of a bubble sheet like this...
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Jim_TX
Oh. (Was mentalling something to do with bubblewrap...)
I saw a pentameter once... it was something with 5 heads and was about 39 inches long, if I recall correctly. I don't think it was iambic, but it was sure ugly.
Jim TX
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Eric
Bubble shee
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Eric
Bubble shee
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Euphemism
*sigh* So the tests for English teachers are all about grammatical minutae and facts... and then they wonder why kids don't enjoy English class?
Best of luck to you, Joanna. Teaching the love of literature is far more important than using gerunds in a participle phrase.
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Eric
Bubble sheet thoughts:
Why do I have to punch bubbles to tell the bubble reading computer the number of the test I'm taking?Aren't we seven levels of technology beyond this in the real world?
Why do I want accreditation from an outfit so mired in the past??
There are ten thousand people who'd jump at the chance to sit in this chair.
There are two hundred people sitting in my chair.
I am the nth percentile group.
.36 (d)
Eric
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Perry
I am always a bit confused by hyperbole. Should I just give up this whole teaching game right now? Or until I can successfully use gerunds in a participle clause? And stop writing in sentence fragments?
The whole experience kind of makes you want to stab yourself with a number 2 soft lead pencil.Don't give up Joann. Just explain that you are pioneering new literary styles.
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joannadandy
*sigh* So the tests for English teachers are all about grammatical minutae and facts... and then they wonder why kids don't enjoy English class?
Amen Euph!
It's kind of silly isn't it?
The second test today was much better. About 35 multiple choice questions and four case studies with 3 essay questions after each for a toal of 12 essay questions. I liked it, still feel woefully unprepared, but at least it got a little bit to what makes a good teacher. I still say having the "right" answer won't help you when it's 2:30 on a Friday and your 9th graders are bouncing off the walls...but eh.