Jennie and I went to Journey of Hope tonight, leaving Jackson and Big Tex home to play a game of Battleship. We hadn't been to our grief support group for a month, so there were new faces. In my adult group were two women I hadn't met before and one I've gotten really close to. One of the women seemed very withdrawn and buttoned up -- didn't say much. The way our group works is that each person tells what happened -- who their loved one was and how he/she died, and how they're feeling. Then we branch off into how we are or are not dealing with grief, etc. The group started with me, so I told about my dad's suicide and how Jehovah's Witnesses drove him to it. As I was talking I suddenly had this feeling that the quiet woman was a JW. She looked familiar but the other two women had said the same thing, and it's possible to run into people in the store or bank and remember their faces later. Anyway, we all went around the table, and this lady was third. She told how her mother had died and that she was bringing her son to the group (it's a support group for children who have lost loved ones and the adult groups are for their parents or other caregivers). She mentioned that the other night her son had broken down in tears after accidentally stepping on her toes and cried that he had hurt his grandmother too. THEN, when asked by the facilitator how she handled his grief, she said that they "talked about religious things for a while" and then felt better.
Hmmmmm.
The group got lighthearted at the end and we talked a little about Christmas and I mentioned that this was going to be my first year celebrating it EVER -- everyone except that one woman remarked on that and I explained that as a Jehovah's Witness I'd never celebrated it so this was going to be pretty special. She stayed very quiet.
As we were leaving to pick up our children and go home, my friend asked this lady what kind of books she liked to read, and she said "oh, I read mostly religious books." End of conversation. Well, I'd heard enough to convince me but I didn't ask her point blank if she was a Witness -- I just said, "I hope I didn't embarass you by anything I said tonight." For the only time that night she looked me in the eyes and said, "Not at all." Very odd evening.
Nina