My son was accepted to prestigious universities

by never a jw 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • never a jw
    never a jw

    Some background needed. Five years ago I decided to research what I thought was a good religion, the religion of my JW wife, to whom I have been married for almost 23 years. What prompted my research was my then 14 y.o. daughter asking me to get baptized. Since at that moment I still believed it was a good religion, I consented on the spot. My opinion took a 180 few days later. But thanks to you and many others who have been active since the days of Raymond Franz I was able to prevent a catastrophe. No, not my daughter. She got baptized and is still in because I couldn't "dishonor" my self by reversing my decision. However, I was able to pull out my unbaptized son out of the cult. He has put his heart and soul into school: academics, sports, traveling, and anything he had the time to get his hands on. His only regret now is that he didn't get into sports earlier. I take the blame for that, of course.

    But let's give credit where credit is due. This fine man just escaped by a narrow margin the clutches of the Watchtower thanks to you all. If anyone can offer advice regarding UCLA or U.C. Berkeley I would greatly appreciate it. We live in Los Angeles., but in the end, it will be whatever he chooses.

  • Finkelstein
    Finkelstein

    Tell him to keep his nose clean there is still lot of boozing, drugs and loose sexual behavior on campuses which should be expected since most Universities and their adjacent dooms are full of young inexperienced and experimenting adolescents.

    A preconceived self awareness to these facts can be a valuable acceptance while there.

  • Tapioca
    Tapioca

    Excellent, NAJ! Really stellar! My higher ed experience is on the east coast, so I will allow others with more relevant intel to step up here. How could either be wrong, though? When my daughters chose east coast universities, it seemed like a long way from home but they turned out to be very successful decisions. A tip of the hat to you and your family!

  • GrreatTeacher
    GrreatTeacher

    So many congratulations! This is great to hear.

  • smiddy
    smiddy

    Well done congrats to you both.

  • scratchme1010
    scratchme1010

    Tell him to keep his nose clean there is still lot of boozing, drugs and loose sexual behavior on campuses which should be expected since most Universities and their adjacent dooms are full of young inexperienced and experimenting adolescents.

    A preconceived self awareness to these facts can be a valuable acceptance while there.

    Nonsense. Tell him to make responsible decisions about everything, including sex, use of drugs, and the kinds of people that he allows in his life, that includes religious people in campus that recruit for harmful organizations like the WT.

    Instead of being narrow about sex is this, drugs are that, reinforce his self-love and self esteem, and that way he will be responsible in any decision he makes. Also make sure that he has good education about the problems that abuse of drugs cause, and the problems that irresponsible or risky sexual behavior can cause, some of them permanent.

    FEAR doesn't work. Telling him "this is bad", doesn't work either. reinforcing being responsible with himself because he's worth it does wonders and he applies that principle to everything.

    Regarding the educational college experience, I'll give the same advice my father gave me. It was one simple word: learn.

  • never a jw
    never a jw

    Thank you all. I am just glad that he never applied to Bethel.

    I am the last person who can write an objective opinion of my own son, so I will write a brief and bias summary anyways. He is a very exceptional kid. He has a good measure of brains and heart.

    I am very glad that, thanks to you, I was able to pull him out of the cult on time. It would have been a pity if more human talent is wasted supporting a real estate empire disguised as a charity.

    He hasn't decided yet whether he goes to UCLA or Berkeley, but whatever school or career he chooses, he will do very well.

  • respectful_observer
    respectful_observer

    U.C. Berkeley...all the way.

    Don't get me wrong, UCLA has a great reputation, but Berkeley's is better. I see lots of CVs in my role and Berkeley jumps out moreso than UCLA (even though my firm recruits heavily from both).

    That being said, if he has a specific major he's intent on, he should go with the school whose program has the better reputation.

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