Log on: Throw another log on the barbie.
Log off: Chuck some water on the barbie.
Dot Matrix: Old Dan Matrix's missus.
Cursor: The miserable old sod next door.
Internet: What you clean out the pond with.
Service provider: Red hot Sheila.
Monitor: Kid who used to fill up the inkwells.
CD: Wrote Tale of 2 cities.
Foreplay: Brace yerself Sheila / Noreen / Loreen
Icon: Rolf Harris
Englishman.