Moving Out Date !!

by jdash 7 Replies latest jw experiences

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  jdash

  So, I guess the upcoming stuff i'm going to say is good to me. My grandmother, yesterday, wanted to talk about some stuff. She had pondered on me leaving at 18 and finally said to me that I can leave whenever, so if I wanted to leave tonight, she wouldn't stop me. It made me feel good. So I talked to the people I am moving in with and they said it was fine if i move in whenever I could, she said that she is excited to have a son! It made me feel welcomed that someone really is excited about me.

  But at the same time, I am nervous to be in a new environment because most of my life I have been around JW's. It's going to be different waking up in a new house, being with new people, having more freedom, etc. I also don't want them to feel as I am going to be a burden on them. It's going to be a bitter sweet farewell*. The room I am staying in is fully furnished, but I am still confused on what to bring. Any ideas?

  *I love my grandmother a lot. I hate seeing her sad, but this is a decision that will help me. She is a very nice and caring person. I don't want to hurt her.

  Thanks for listening to me! Any advice or suggestions will be truly appreciated it!
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  The Fall Guy

  Visit her as often as possible, and never stop letting her know how much you love & care for her!!!
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  Incognigo Montoya

  Not completely up to speed on your entire situation, but leaving home, under any circumstances, is hard. When it comes to leaving parents and grandparents, remember; they've lived their life. They were your age once. They've undoubtedly gone out and done things that they'll never tell you about, and that would probably make you blush... They've had fun, made good choices and bad. They are living the life they made now. Your life is just starting and you have every right to go out and live it. It's important to, remember, love, and care for your family, so long as they aren't causing you harm (physical or mental) always check in on them and let them know how you're doing. But don't ever let them, or anyone guilt you into not living your life!
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  smiddy3

  Good advice from TFG and I M , above and just be yourself. You will be fine and so will your grandmother knowing that you are becoming an adult and she will be happy for you.
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  Onager

  The room I am staying in is fully furnished, but I am still confused on what to bring. Any ideas?

  Anything you want! It's hard to tell if you're just staying in this new place for a short period of time or are moving in for good. Either way, you could bring a familiar bedside lamp, or chair or something. I'm sure that if you talked to the people you are moving in with they would move out any bits of furniture that you wanted to replace with your own.
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  Giordano

  I love my grandmother a lot. I hate seeing her sad, but this is a decision that will help me. She is a very nice and caring person. I don't want to hurt her.

  As far as I can recall from your previous posts you have been waiting for the day you could move out of your Grandmother's home. Grandma was hell on wheels holding you to her religious beliefs and her standards re meeting attendance, field service....... ouch....... you no longer wanted to endure.

  However it sounds like she still wants you in her life so she may be rethinking about living alone especially if she is in her 6th or 7th decade.

  As far as moving goes make it provisional......... both parties get to try it out....... and see if it works. Continue to be in close contact with your grandmother. Leave that door open for both of you.

  What to pack? Anything that you use or rely on each day. Maybe two suitcases worth of cloths and other stuff. Leave your Grandmother's room intact as you may spend the occasional night there. If so remember to check if she needs any help with things in her home. Always volunteer to help her.

  Your grandmother's needs will increase as she ages so make sure she knows you care and will be there for her going forward as best you can.

  She may have been a tough cookie to live with but she never threw you out to fend for yourself as happens to many 'rebellious' JW teenagers.

  Continue with your education, make new friends and make reasonable sound choices......as it's your life.

  P.S. I left home at 17 too.
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  jdash

  @Giordano - she won't be living at the house alone, one of my uncles lives there as well. thanks for the advice, i will use it

  @Onager - yeah true that, i feel as she wants me to be guilt tripped by saying the world will "eat you up and spit you out"

  All the others, thanks for the advice
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  Incognigo Montoya

  The world can "eat you up and spit you out". It happens to lots of people every day. But all parents and grandparents worry about that when it comes to their offspring venturing off on their own. We all know what she as a witness means when she says that, but every parent worries about the general well being and welfare of their child.

  Keep your wits about you. Trust your gut, your intuition, your sense of right and wrong. Be slow to trust others and quick to trust yourself. Do that and you'll be fine out there in the real world. Good luck and have fun!