Ran into my brother at a concert; first time I've seen him in years......

by dubstepped 19 Replies latest jw experiences

  • scratchme1010

    Thank you so much for sharing. Who knows if that interaction may make them think. I'm sure they will remember it.

  • sir82

    For a split second their humanity kicked in, and they turned red because they know deep down how messed up this is.

    Always fascinating to see first-hand stuff like this. You read about on this forum, or even textbooks, but it is always a gut-punch when it happens in real-time.

  • Rainbow_Troll

    I no longer live in the same place as my old JW friends but I wish I had possessed your courage back when I did. Back then I would just try to avoid them as much as possible... something I really regret now that I've finally grown a pair. The problem is that even if I now had the opportunity to meet them in person, I'm afraid I'd still be the anxious one while they would come out of it calm and unperturbed. How do you pull it off without looking like a desperate, jilted lover?

  • dubstepped

    RT, I won't pretend that I always had that courage, though honestly this is the first time I've seen anyone. It's weird, as I used to come across dubs all the time when I was one. Now I almost never see them.

    As far as how to come off well, I'd say that what I did was about all one can do. I walked up, head held high because I knew I was being the better person, and just waved and said hi. When they looked away, rather than begging them for attention I just laughed at their ridiculousness, said oooooohhhhkay, and walked away laughing. It honestly is somewhat humorous. I don't think there's much more to do.

    Oh and I walked up because I didn't feel anxious. There's nothing wrong with anxiety getting you, you feel how you feel. In this instance I just felt empowered and went for it. Had anxiety been strong, maybe I wouldn't have and that's okay too.

  • DesirousOfChange

    Immediately, literally as soon as we got back, before we had a chance to say anything to one another or process anything one of our new friends since we've been out appeared out of thin air behind us. Her smiling face was the first thing we saw, and we talked to her about normal things for a minute. Then I saw another new friend of ours coming up the aisle toward us, and he stopped and talked to us. It was so interesting, like the universe said "here are your real friends" immediately after this experience. It felt good.

    Evidently™ the Holy Spirit came to your assistance when you were at great risk of becoming discouraged.

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    The end of the world is right around the corner yet there they were taking time out to attend the same "worldly" music event with you and all of the rest of the non JW audience. They were outnumbered and their JW reasonings for shunning you must have seemed pretty feeble at that moment. I'm guessing that's what the red faces were all about.

    Call it vanity if you will but there's something very satisfying about having your former JW friends and family see you doing well and carrying on with your life normally rather than it having become the "train wreck" they had expected or even may have hope for, on some level.

  • dubstepped

    @DOC - Lol, it is evident, holy spirit was with me that night at the Bush concert. The only thing is that the holy spirit seems to push me toward atheists and agnostics all the time. But, I must follow it's leading so as not to grieve it terribly.

  • Tallon

    Well done, dubstepped. You proved who was the bigger man.

  • steve2

    I passed by a old JW acquaintance of mine recently - first time in over 30 years! I simply said, "Hi _____" and kept walking.

    She looked up and, expressionlessly, looked right through me. It was over in a flash. Her head went back down and I kept walking. An intense moment in time: She had honed the act of shunning to perfection and I, the act of moving on with head held up.

    I walked on, marvelling at the different things we humans perfect in our short lives and the choices we make along the way. Being shunned can stay with you long after the encounter just as certain as my words stayed with her. As I get older in a system that should have seen me dead in my twenties, I realize being shunned is a price well worth paying for now having my own life, friends and family whom I love and am loved in return free from the taint of the threat of being shunned.

  • flipper

    DUBSTEPPED- Well done by you and your wife ! Bravo ! You acted like normal, humane, sensitive human beings who show love and care for your relatives. No matter what their response was - YOU and your WIFE did the right thing - so it's on them if they chose to be douche bags. We as EX-JW's have no reason to hang our heads, no reason to hide- as we know it's the JW cult and WT Society that are in the wrong with their hateful policies. WT leaders turn typical JW's into a bunch of haters. Let the hater's hate- but by our doing the right thing- perhaps these relatives may wake up some day to their errors and mind control. One can only hope

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