Contaminated Thought System

by new boy 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • new boy
    new boy

    In gathering the last little bits of info for my book I tracked down different people, that I have known for many decades. Some are still JWs and many have made the break to freedom.

    One of the people I contacted was a woman I knew over forty years ago. She like myself was a "born in." She committed adultery back in the early nineteen eighties. Like many people who have been trapped in bad marriages, it was the only way to end and unpleasant situation.

    She was able to kill two birds with one stone, and got rid of bad marriage and a bad religion. She was able to do this by way of what she thinks of to this day as an evil act/sin. Even though she believes ending the marriage was the best thing she every did.

    40 years out and still feeling guilty. She committed a sin. she "missed the mark." In her mind she broke the rules. Who's rules? What rules?

    I have just turned 69 years old and been "out" for over 17 years. Yet, I know in my heart that I'm still dealing with this contaminated thought system that I had been raised in. I know my children who were "born in" and who also have been out of the religion for the same amount of time are still dealing with the confusion of how they were raised. Sadly even my grand children who were never Jehovah's Witnesses have been effected by it.

    Many of my ex-Jehovah Witnesses friends tell me what is "right or wrong" what is "appropriate and inappropriate behavior"

    Yet where did we get these concepts from? The Bible or other books? Or maybe our parents with their contaminated thought systems?

    We all choose what we what to believe in, don't we? Yet were did these notions really come from?

    If we don't continually challenge ourselves and test ourselves with the eternal questions of "What, Where, How and Why, how will we ever know if we are free from the many contaminated thought systems that proliferate this planet?

    What is your "truth" and what do you believe in?

  • Phizzy

    " What is your "truth" and what do you believe in? "

    I tend not to believe in anything much. By "believe" I mean "trust that something is true, without evidence."

    I trust that something is true when there is satisfactory evidence to back it, I know this is not infallible though, there are no absolute truths it seems, and the evidence could be wrong in some way. But the method at least excludes anything that is totally lacking in evidence.

    As to moral judgements and decisions, I live by the Mantra " Do the most good, and the last harm". There is no need to consult others, or bother about what they think, just live that way.

  • Vanderhoven7

    I believe in God the Father and Jesus Christ His Son. I believe that Jesus Christ took the judgment of God on the cross to forgive our sin and open the door to peace with God, heaven and holiness. I believe God receives sinners gladly and transforms them fitting them for eternal relationship with Him. I believe that the Father reveals Himself through the Son and that without this revelation we cannot know or love God with all our being which is the first commandment. I believe that our purpose in life is to love God and every person God brings upon our path until we grow and mature into the image of Christ.

  • zophar

    I'm from your same generation, you have me beat by a couple years.

    Yes, it stays with you. It is very difficult to be open-minded or be able to think independently for yourself being raised in a JW culture.

    I guess I was always a bit of a rebel. A friend who left the Organization about 8-9 years ago, tells me how he always admired my ability to think for myself despite what the Org tells us to think. I don't know if that is completely true, but I'm glad that is the way I appeared to him and evidently others. Yet he is now completely free from the Organization and I am not able to say that for now. If you ARE a person who tends to think for himself and you are a JW serving in an appointed position, you are always viewed with suspicion by the dyed in the wool minions.

    However, over the years, I found that there were people with very responsible positions, CO's, DO's and even at least one in the Service Department at Bethel, that revealed a bit of ability to think outside the Organizational box. I always wonder, where are they now in their thinking?

    Recently had a discussion with a Bethel Overseer who had lots of responsibilities. (He was there when you were.) He has had a lot of bitter experiences with the Organization since he left Bethel, and yet, still he remains a JW. Old habits are indeed hard to break.

  • waton

    The values that have been encoded into the written or unwritten rules evolved like everything connected to life.Moral rules were made to bolster certain situations, like the desire of one male to have exclusive passing of his genes to one, or more harem females. That led to family, tribal, national distinctions. Sprinters from West Africa, Marathoners from the East.

    but evolution also favours the outsiders, breaking those rules, sneaking in their genes imitating the cuckoo strategy (displacing even killing the family offspring).

    So: look at the peculiar moral guidelines as a social strategy. Frankly, I like the biblical concept of stable, faithful marriages. It worked for my mother, and gives me peace.

    The instability that the free for all that even in politics has become fashionable is not for the fainthearted like me.

  • Giordano

    I shook off the JW'S by the time I was 22 I will be 75 in a few weeks. A lot of good living........ fun adventures with my wife of 56 years (my old pioneer partner) who left when I did.

    When I told her I was no longer a believer but I'd support her if she wanted to continue with her JW beliefs. She told me........... "never mine, I never believed it was the truth"

    That was a hell of a surprise and a hell of a gift!

    I gave up on the Society. The average JW was far more impressed then I was. Their doctrines....... most of which came under the heading of.....don't hold your breath. Or........... you expect me to walk around with a suicide note in my pocket (the no blood card)?

    As far as any after effects from leaving nothing we couldn't handle....mostly a cold shoulder from friends and some relatives. We just shrugged that shit off.

    "appropriate and inappropriate behavior"
    Yet where did we get these concepts from? The Bible or other books?

    We got those concepts from the WTBTS. Remember there is always a scripture backing up what they teach even if they have pulled it out of context.

    The JW's learn that there are right things and wrong things as determined by the WT. Not only right or wrong things but things they have not even told their followers.

    One of the worst things you can do as a JW is to think critically.

    Being a Secular Humanist replaces what the WT tried to shove down our throats.

    "Secular humanists hold that ethics is consequential, to be judged by results. This is in contrast to so-called command ethics, in which right and wrong are defined in advance and attributed to divine authority. “No god will save us,” declared Humanist Manifesto II (1973), “we must save ourselves.” Secular humanists seek to develop and improve their ethical principles by examining the results they yield in the lives of real men and women.

  • dogisgod

    Born in. stayed 50 or so years. I have so many self doubts because of indoctrination. I always have to question "why am I thinking/feeling this/that". I think JWs are so judgemental because you have to accept that everybody deserves to be destroyed....whether they are good or bad. I wish I could find a therapist who has experience with cults. (without being too weird themselves). Now the holidays are coming. Just to get thru another xmas. It's not that it makes me angry or anything. It's just pretty exhausting.

  • Tameria2001

    " What is your "truth" and what do you believe in? "

    My "truth" from what I have always believed in was and still is. I taught my boys this as well.

    First, you treat people the way you want to be treated and second DO NOT take any bull from anyone, stand up for yourself, but be wise on how you do it.

  • Finkelstein

    I believe that knowledge of the world in which live is the only savior benefiting mankind to eventuate the improvement of the human experience.

    Being that religion or mysticism is born out of human ignorance, I no longer believe anything spiritual or the acceptance of a spiritual deity to appear in resolve humanity's perils.

    The hope for mankind might very well be wholly within are selves and embracing ancient mythology is counter productive and a crippling folly.

  • zeb

    Please would the lady first mentioned ever gone to counselling? You cant leave this damned sect alone you do need support and with a counsellor who is experienced in cults.

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