Office Jargon, drives me nuts

by punkofnice 30 Replies latest social humour

  • punkofnice

    'Granular' seems to be the latest buzz word going around my office. Previously it was 'appetite'.

    Abstract words that appear to be designed to make the person saying it appear powerful and part of the 'team'.

    As Lord Sugar has observed before; why not just speak English and say what you mean.

    Office jargon really annoys me. I had enough loaded language and jargon in the disgusting JW cult.

  • Londo111
    For years the term "reaching out" irked me. Then I began to use it.
  • Saintbertholdt

    Well you should cultivate an enthusiastic appetite for the unifying yet sometimes granular nature of corporate communication synergy. It is a fact that the tangential convergence of linguistic tendencies throughout the corporate structure energizes it, so that the focus can be reshifted to the underlying mission and vision driving the dynamic to the bleeding technological edge, resulting in greater economies of scale and gains for the investor, so much so that they can hardly count.

    Talk at you later.

  • TheListener
    What Ming said...
  • talesin

    Every Wednesday, I have a worker that drives me around. He is my Minder. :P

    We go to Wal-Mart (I know, but it's what I have to do) for some items - one of them is an huge bag of cat food (for the birds, actually). I have to wheel down the large aisle near the back, where they are having the weekly staff meeting. Yes, in the aisle. *rolls eyes*

    The loaded language of the W-Mart Cult of Sam (my term) makes me cringe every time I have to drive through it. They even hold hands and shit.

    ugh ..........

  • LoveUniHateExams

    As an exJW, I get what you're saying, Punk.

    And luckily I've never worked in an office beyond a 6 month temporary position.

    But, perhaps laughing at the ridiculous jargon may be a good idea - just imagine David Brent saying some of those terms!

  • Stealth


    Sounds like your getting lost in the shifting landscape of the office. If you could become more agile you might experience a paradigm shift in your thought processes.

  • Angharad

    Ping - as in you'll email someone, big in my office and really grates on me

    Proactive also seems to be the latest buzzword that is being thrown around lately. One of the senior managers I work with loves the word paradigm, when we have our quarterly meetings a couple of us like to play buzzword bingo and see how long it takes for the favorite words to be thrown out

  • Darkknight757
    Not sure if this would qualify as "office jargon" but my boss uses the term "power flat" to describe a stabilizing land we put on the edge of some of the cutters we make in the shop. The term sounds retardified.
  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    For a while everyone was using the word "organic"...drove me nuts

    "He thinks of the city not as a collection of different neighborhoods but as an "organic" whole."

    ...and if I hear the word "Sustainable" or "Sustainability" again today, someone's goin' down.

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