What kind of restrictions are people put under when their behaviour has been considered worthy of disfellowshipping but have managed to avoid the big "D"?
Me (going back a bit):
1. Never to be in the company of the lady unchaperoned although we were "betrothed".
2. Removed from ministerial servants position.
3. Not allowed to pray in the congregation at all, including book study.
4. Removed as Watchtower study conductor.
5. Removed as public speaker and talks at Service meetings.
6. Removed as pioneer.
7. Report to PO once a month.
Amazingly, I missed none of those things and relished the freedom from responsibility. Although I was still living at my parents house, I took up lorry driving as my occupation and was more than happy to miss meetings when I was away. This was the start of my long fade from JW's. The restrictions that were imposed upon me actually resulted in me being less open to the daily brain-washing that most witnesses unwittingly accept.
Let's see... I've had:
Removal from microphone duty - YAY!! I can finally sit down during the meeting.
Removal from sound desk - YAY!! (and nobody else knew how to use it, so that was fun to watch)
Removal from saying the prayer - YAY!!
Removal from reading the WT or book study book on the platform - YAY!! I didn't want the job anyway.
When the gave me my "privileges" back i told them i didn't want them and wouldn't be doing them. I didn't understand it. They told me i should be "reaching out". I told them "i have a 6 month old babe, a wife with severe OCD, a stressful job and im surrounded by brothers who are, apparently, more spiritual than me. So i dont need or want this "privilege" thank you.
That was satisfying i can tell you.
My dad, who was our PO, was very anxious to see me back on the public speaker's list. So about a month after the restrictions ended I gave my first public talk in over a year. But my heart wasn't in it. The talk lasted just 30 minutes and I couldn't wait to get off the platform.
The lady with whom I'd had the dalliance came under the spell of someone else. To my own amazement I was quite un-heartbroken. I'd been saving hard and had money in the bank and there were some beautiful sports cars out there! I met someone else, another JW lady, we married within a few months, later had 2 children and parted after just 3 years. Then I was disfellowshipped for associating with other df'd persons.Later on I met another never-been lady and we're still happily together after many many years.
But that's quite another story..
They told me i should be "reaching out".
I had the same experience. Had all "privileges" removed when I grew my close trimmed beard. I had facial skin cancer at the time. When they loaded me down again I declined to fulfill the duties they tried to force on me and I got the "you should be reaching out" crap. I asked them to show me where in the bible it said I had to reach out. They of course flipped to 1 Tim. 3: 1. I asked what part of "IF" was a command. Of course they had n answer to that!
So at present I do not get to comment anymore, do not get to say prayers anymore, do not get to read at the book and WT studies anymore. I do get stuck on the list to pay for the Sunday speakers dinner though. I decline that. I do get to be put on the list for cleaning the toilets. I refuse. I do get hit up for money to pay for all the latest "wants" of the eldurrs. I firmly say "NO" to those. When the last of my still in elderly family (only one left) goes then so do I!
I don't want to discuss what led up to it (too painful and involved a family matter), but during book study I was not called on by the regular conductor even if mine was the only hand up. One Saturday morning, there were only three of us: the assistant conductor, a sister, and I.
The assistant conductor said the opening prayer, read the paragraphs, said the closing prayer. I was allowed to comment. I asked him, a nice but evasive brother, why I couldn't read the paragraphs. I understood not doing the prayer. He said, somewhat nervously, that he hadn't heard me read before and felt he should handle it. Never once did the elders have a talk with me to say what was going on.
Years later, in a different congregation, I was allowed to comment although a long-haired, bearded inactive member.
Even though I wasn`t attending meetings......BORING!
My restriction was:
"I wasn`t allowed to answer at meetings."......LOL!!..
Did they think I would start going to meetings, so I couldn`t answer at meetings?!
I couldn`t handle the stupid behaviour of the average JW and/or JW Elder.
That didn`t help.....LOL!!
there are two standard restrictions, three for males and they are reversed in the normal order.
comments is restored first
talks on the midweek meetings
public prayers for males.
I was not allowed to read at the bookstudy in my final phase of my fade.
I bought booze when I was barely legal. Some of my underage jw friends got into my stash when I was at work and got drunk and some hanky panky went on with some teenage jw girls and guys. Even though I wasn't there it was my fault somehow. I
got removed as a pioneer
couldnt say the prayer at the meetings
i could still comment