Went to the assembly..some.personal thoughts on it.

by integ 22 Replies latest jw friends

  • integ

    I've been as honest as I can on this forum throughout my time bouncing in and out..and been jumped on for saying anything positive about the "truth" or my experiences at the hall, but it's been a few years now since I have been attending meetings. I go to the memorial for family reasons and went to the assembly today for the same reason...but one observation I have to make is most of us have all dealt with years of hearing how gawd awful "the world" is and how the only happiness is going to meetings and out in service. Now THAT is total BS. The world is what we make of it. If you see it as a bad place...it'll be that way. In all honesty "the world" may not be as great as a repressed witness on the way out may think it is. There's a ton of bad...and negativity. Financial problems...people problems...crime etc etc etc. a heck of a lot of despair. THAT is all true. In my lengthy time away...I have come to fully realize this. Leaving the "truth" is not an escape to Disneyland where we soar on the winds of freedom and happiness. It doesn't make the witnesses "right" with everything...it's just the way it is.

    I have to say there IS something to the mind numbing quiet of sitting for a few hours and zoning out at the assembly. Seeing alot of old friends even if I didn't talk to them was nice. I found the whole thing oddly cathartic just sitting there. It brought back alot of old memories. I won't get into what was actually being said on the podium cuz i've fought against that so much that i'm exhausted from it. It's mostly BS...I think that has been solidly established. I'm talking about just the experience (beyond that) of just being there in an atmosphere I grew up in...and have so many memories of. It was not a negative experience.

    I remember the being pent up and controlled at the meetings would make the going out in the world that much more fun and exciting. Couldn't wait to get out and do fun stuff. I think those brought up witnesses almost have a better appreciation of things in the "world" due to being so restricted from it.

    Anyway, not to diminish those that have been so negatively affected by the "truth" in serious ways..and make light of the experience of the assembly...but it was a bit of an escape from the "world" in which I have immersed myself these past years...if just for a few hours.

    Thanks for listening.

  • Awakenednow

    Thanks for sharing your experience Integ. It's nice hearing that you are at peace with it all. I understand the nostalgia and I miss those times too, everything except the bs parts including the nonsense of being shunned. But, the times in the "truth" were some of the happiest times of my life and I always looked forward to assemblies, except the last couple due to waking up to all the doctrinal error and those were like listening to fingernails scratching chalk boards for hours. The world definitely is what you make of it. My life is blessed and I'm happy to have moved on. Maybe one day I'll pop in an assembly to say hi just like you. I'm happy for you that you've found the strength to move forward.

  • berrygerry

    Ummm, go watch a good movie.

  • integ

    Thanks. I guess the part i'm over with is the taking notes and refuting everything being said. I've accepted the errors and outright BS are what they are: lies and BS.. and today did not get mad about it. It isn't worth it. Now, this would be different if I was now going back to 3 meetings a week and service. I'm sure of that. It's easy to pop in like this to an assembly..and pop right out. The hard part is fending off elders who think I might be coming back full time. That's a risk I took right there.

    With the world the way it is right now...I DO wish they really were right...but my logical mind won't allow that. Sad part is too...they themselves created the doubt with the lies and cover ups...the flip flops....the BS. THEY did this. They make it impossible to buy in to it all. Man, I wish it were all real. It'd be great. But alas...like so many things...too good to be true; and for them to punish you for not buying in 100%? That is just plain wrong.

  • stuckinarut2

    Sounds like a sentimental journey?

    Just have to make sure that the deception and lies are ignored....

  • smiddy

    Hi integ ,thanks for your post.

    The World has always been a "gawd awful" place ever since Cain killed Abel and God / jehovah if you like, has always been complicit in it ,for he has allowed it to deteriorate over the Centuries without intervening in this particular problem .

    Jehovah allowed the first murder to take place without so much as an adequate penalty imposed , a life was lost and Cain was just banished yet protected from any retalliation for Abels death .Was that justice ?

    On the plus side the Worldly people have made the Earth a beautiful place where humans have gone out of their way to help other humans whom they dont even know when they need help in any way they can financially and otherwise when disaster strikes or when famines occur

    They also continually support fund drives with $$$$ for this that or the other need of humanity .

    Jehovahs witnesses do not support any charity whatsoever of a worldly nature yet they will take any and everything the Government offers them .

    Jehovahs Witnesses are parasites in human form.Take all that is offered and give nothing back.

    I have some good memories in my 33 years as a jw ,and their were definetely some good genuine people in the Organisation that I have fond memories of.

    However they ,like me were under an illusion that this religion was sanctioned by God and were blessed by him as his organisation.

    The difference is I woke up and ,as far as I know most of my peers in the "truth" never have.

    While we can look back on the good old times ,the fact is it was all based on a lie.,we were decieved and so were they our friends of old.

  • freddo

    Hi integ,

    I don't think I've bumped into you on the forum before. Keep posting as your perspective is interesting. You seem to be in the "perfect" faded position with a family that is prepared to tolerate or even be content with the way you conduct yourself.

    If you have no anger yet no belief in the BS then that is not a bad place to be.

    A very balanced post.

    Spare a thought for those actively shunned by their family - especially for those believing little different from you and harming no-one.

    BTW - how many were baptised as compared with attendance?

  • Zyron

    I See where you're coming from. Went to the one day assembly recently and I guess the experience is not too dissimilar to Disneyland. Make belief. You suspend disbelief for the nice feeling and smile it brings to your heart. A safe(ish) environment, meet up with people you haven't seen for ages ( weddings and funerals come to mind).

    I don't think I've heard anyone talk about the assembly programme during the lunch time breaks unless it's about 'tear jerk' experience.

    I just wonder with the proliferation of tablets, ipads and smartphones how many people actually pay attention. These devices are a godsend for those of us still going to preserve the peace in our families.

    One observation I noted at my assembly in the UK was the number of brothers with beards, ok they weren't on the platform but still evidence of defiance and independent thinking.

  • nowwhat?

    When I would see all the smiling happy faces at the assembly. I would think there must be something to this "brotherhood" only jw's experience. But then I would notice people in the "world" at various gatherings such as school functions for their kids or such. And I would notice the same smiling faces. The happiness was derived from just seeing people they know and are friends with. And who they have common ground with. As simple as that.

  • WingCommander

    So that Kool-Aide is still Ummmm-ummmmm good for you, is it? Well then, just sit on down, shut off your brain, and drooooooool as Lett the Clown or TOMO III indoctrinate you with their rubbish for a few hours. **GAG**

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