I have to vent about someone...

by babygirl30 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • babygirl30

    I'm sorry if this comes across as rude or mean, but I'm sorry - NOT sorry! :-)

    There is a woman that was in my congregation for years. She was dating a 'worldly' man at the time and ended up DF'd. She married him, got pregnant, and reinstated - and all was well I guess. She would aux pioneer here and there, she got her husband to study, and he would come to meetings here and there. But for the most part, he kept his distance from all things JW except gatherings - cause he was ALWAYS at those! -hahaha. Now over the years, my situation changed I was DF'd, and have not been back since. AT that point, she unfriended me on facebook, which I expected and had no issue with. It's not like we were all that close anyhow.

    9yrs have passed, and I get a random friend request from her - which I accept. I typically assume that when people from my old congregation request me, it's just to see if I am back/reinstated. But I am sure by my pics, language, and posted topics, they can clearly see I am not and will eventually unfriend me anyhow. Matter-a-fact, an ex of mine (JW guy) friended me, went through ALL my pics, must've noticed I am NOT a JW anymore but am happy despite (this guy was a controlling jerk-off), and unfriended me not too long afterwards. Anyways, back to this woman. She sends me this DM:

    Mind you, I responded, and that leads to a conversation...where she OPENLY admits that she does NOT agree with the JW's...

    ...but after her last statement above, she FLIPS the convo around, and begins witnessing to ME!!! Trying to convince me to come back. I was nice about it, but firmly explained my reasoning behind not wanting to go back and my lack of interest in returning. Now you would think that someone saying no would be enough. NOPE! A week later, she comes back with this:

    This last time, I went IN!!! Not into the differing doctrines, but in on HER. This is her 2nd time being DF'd for the same reason (a man)...and all the pics on her FB show some guy with a full beard and tats. So this is yet another round for her - which I calmly reminded her of. My issue lies in that fact that her main concern being DF'd should be herself - not me and my salvation. Are you kidding me? You don't get bonus points in heaven if you, being DF'd help someone else who is DF'd? HAHAHAHAHA...the nerve of these people. I tried to be nice. And I am one of those people that doesn't like putting folks on blast unless they absolutely deserve it. But THIS crap got under my skin. Again, get over yourself. Obviously she cannot didn't learn her lesson with the JWs the first time, now because she decides to go back a 2nd time, she wants to be a savior? smdh...

    vent - over.

  • xelder

    In my opinion, often the motivation of religious people seems to be the security of the herd. The more that others confirm their beliefs, it proves they must be right. Therefore, convincing others matters greatly to them.

  • Worldling9

    She is clearly a very confused young woman. Please remember that her issues are her own.

  • freddo

    Well ... I know it must be irritating but this is your opportunity to convince her that life outside is better and why that is so.

    It is incredibly galling when someone acts like she does - but she is talking to you and this is an opportunity to calmly tell her like it is (the jw organisation, I mean).

    ARC/Generation/unscriptural demands etc etc etc.

    If not for her for her kids?

  • steve2

    She thinks by trying to convince you to go back, she'll prove to herself she really does believe in the organization. She's see-sawing between believing it and clinging onto that man with the beard and tatts. She's little more than a hypocrite.

  • stuckinarut2


    yep, I know a sister who was DF at least three times for running off with different men. And the men she ran off with (destroying their families in the process) all came to meetings with her as a DF person!

    She even brought one to baptism!

    The arrogance of ones who have no right to be "spiritual preachers" to others is mind blowing!

  • babygirl30

    XELDER - she needs to worry about her OWN security before she comes for mine. How and why be concerned with me and my life?

    WORLDLING9 - you got that right! Dazed and confused...she needs to get it together and figure out. But in the meantime, stop writing such contradictions.

    FREDDO - when she first reached out, I did in fact give her specific reasons why I had no interest in going back, all of which were doctrine (not personal): blood doctrine, abuse dealings, df process not biblically based, choice of elders, 144k keep growing, baptizing kids, JW broadcast (tv evangelizing). It was all short and sweet. But her last response came a week after I did that, so it is obvious nothing said 'stuck'.

    STEVE2 - that is my thing. When ex JWs reach out to me, I try to be careful NOT to lead them in any direction. Ya know? I encourage them to do their research, talk to others, and follow their hearts. Cause that is what I did! But for this chick to be browbeating me, despite her being in the JW doghouse for the 2nd time, is retarded. Thats why the 2nd time, I had no quams checking her.

    STUCKINARUT2 - lol! Im not even mad at that sister...she has balls! 3 men AND brought em all to the hall? Shoot. I never understood that mentality. If you want to 'do you' then go right ahead, but make sure you are not living in a glass house. Dont come for me...

  • raven

    I agree with the others, she must be attempting to prove to herself that this organization isn't a bunch of BS. That's why shes figured "Hey maybe if I get a DF'd person back in then Jehovah's amazing spirit of truth is real."

    If I were you and she sends another message, I would probably just stop replying.. There's no sense in talking with ones who firmly believe this is the so called truth, it's like beating a dead horse. ( it kind of sounds like she doubts, but then she stops herself and reverts back to the org being the truth, seemingly to keep herself from realizing its all a scam ) If she believes the org is the real channel through which God rules, then I would tell her to focus on herself.. Especially since she's a second timer with Disfellowshipping... LOL what a joke.

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