HAVE YOU EVER? (Hypnotized)
I had been hypnotized the night before and "woke" in the middle of a job interview the following day.
It startled me.
The face of my interviewer twigged as well, witnessing this emergence of a "new" amplitude in my ... well... let's call it "being."
Looking back on this, it's like those devil possession scenes in films when the beast makes itself known.
Except - I remind you - it was THE REAL me.
I'll give you a few seconds to catch up to what I'm reporting to you.
My interviewer registered awareness of this transformation.
The sleepwalking Terry vanished.
Seated in the same chair, the refurbished "me" crackled with personality.
My interior was scrambling; playing catch up. I had to save the performance -- I needed this job!
I tossed in an unasked-for-explanation.
"You'll have to excuse me - I was up very late last night at a party and all the coffee I've had this morning - well - the caffeine has suddenly jolted me."
Big smile from me.
A flicker of understanding on the Interviewer.
(The involuntary nod.)
I gave a big finish. The day was won.
Afterward, interior panic struck. What the hell had happened the night before?
I provisionally "thought" I knew. Only -- it was now obvious this was not "knowing" knowing. It was a passive, lazy, neutral list of events only.
Somebody had stolen my soul!
Okay - that's stupid and overly dramatic. It just felt that way.
I NEVER believed in hypnotism as anything genuine.
And yet --- this ...this....?
What had happened was this. (I've probably mentioned it in some previous anecdote.)
At a party, a hypnotist asked for volunteers and I was offered up by those gathered (rather unwillingly.)
Resistance is futile when the mob cries out.
"Imagine there is a helium balloon tied to your wrist."
"Relax completely and feel the slight tug of the string on your wrist as the balloon pulls ..."
"You arm is light as a feather. It begins to rise ....to rise higher ...higher..."
Long story short: I decided to "play along" and ham it up.
The joke was on me - the foolish victim cannot fully realize this is exactly what hypnotism counts on to work properly.
A wee spot of participation, surrender, compliance.
Just one kiss - okay? (We all know where it leads.)
So I was royally fucked! Up!
Fast Forward. Next Day. Job Interview.
The Interviewer had spoken some word which released me from my walking dead performance.
I was a driver-less car all that time.
Now why am I bringing this up suddenly?
The next time this happened was about 6 years ago.
I was at work on my way to the cash register at the Book Store where I ----
Suddenly I wake up much LATER - in the driver's seat of my car on the f-ing freeway (for God's sake!) on my way to Dallas from Ft. Worth.
This is Billy Pilgrim stuff here! Slaughterhouse Five.
I've come un-stuck in time or something.
I figured it was a Panic Attack.
Sure. Why not? At least that sounds like "something".
It rattled me enough.
I took two weeks off for "therapy."
I ended up retiring for good.
When it comes to an EXPLANATION I can't say there is one.
I do know one thing. When I woke up this morning I had subconsciously (dreamed?) put 2+2 together.
It all started at that party. Whatever it is / was.
Right at this morning I am either:
A. Awake and understanding my "sleep"
B. Asleep dreaming I'm awake.
Can any of us know for sure who's driving?
Are we a passenger?
HAVE YOU EVER? (Hypnotized)