September 17th 19...

by LogansRun 9 Replies latest jw friends

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  LogansRun

  One decision One day One event , today is the anniversary of the plunge that ruined my life .I was young and now I'm old and feel screwed over - OK my personal pity party is over If you made it this far thank you for just being out there.

  Now my fading update, no meetings for 3 weeks they don't know yet I'm not coming back but thanks to this site and many helpful Youtube stories I have some tools to know how to play this game. Because this is a fade I have not been able to tell my story but it really is unique ,I can say at this time there is no wife or kids involved but I do have siblings in this and my oldest brother is a super strict witness to the point of being a bully but thankfully most of my extended family are not J-Dubs and that's what's going to help me get through this along with all of you . Have a great day folks !
  
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  Wasanelder Once

  Run Logan, run! Don't look back!
  
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  SAHS

  Congratulations, “LogansRun,” on your, I assume intentional, three-week absence from the cult meetings (intentional as opposed to being laid up in the hospital or something). You’re on the right track now. Instead of focusing on the anniversary of your baptism (coercion dunk), now you can focus, with pride, on whatever will be the anniversary date of your taking charge of the rest of your life and actually accomplishing your long-overdue escape from the WT mind prison.

  Good luck on making your total escape from the cult a reality! Keep us posted.
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  Giordano

  This is certainly the place to rant, the place to get help when you need it or make some friends as well.
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  LogansRun

  Thanks All , I'm feeling a bit better now I just listened to the latest edition of "The vast apostate hour" on YouTube , first time I heard it live and it was good show. I even enjoyed two chili dogs and a few beers while I listened. As for tomorrow NO MEETING just a full day of football on TV.
  
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  laverite

  LogansRun,

  Please rant. Please share what you are comfortable sharing. Your story could be a comfort to others, and just by you posting, you could be helping someone else, even if they never reach out to you.

  Without the tools you mentioned, fading can be very difficult. Some are caught like a deer in headlights when elders approach or someone calls by their house unexpectedly. It's easy to get sucked back in. I hope the tools you've gathered during your preparation for your exit will help you stay the course. It's worth it.

  Life after Watchtower is so very much more fulfilling and meaningful in almost every way imaginable. I would guess that most of us who have managed to escape don't ever really taken our freedoms for granted. I guess I should just speak for myself: I certainly don't take my freedom of thought and freedom from Watchtower for granted.
  
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  pale.emperor

  Life after Watchtower is so very much more fulfilling and meaningful in almost every way imaginable. I would guess that most of us who have managed to escape don't ever really taken our freedoms for granted. I guess I should just speak for myself: I certainly don't take my freedom of thought and freedom from Watchtower for granted.

  Laverite is right. I've been out 3 months after being raised in the bOrg and im the nicest person i've ever been. Im kinder, funnier, more outgoing and i have a lot of things to look forward to. You no doubt feel the same (or you will futher on). Saturday and Sunday lie-in's are still a novelty for me. It's great to actually have days off from getting up early.
  

  Id be interested to hear your story when you're ready. We all would.
  
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  laverite

  I agree with pale.emperor. If/when you're ready, we'd love to hear your story. Pale, I think that when the stress of life as a witness -- never being good enough, never doing enough, needing to always reach out more -- is lifted, that one can't help but be better at dealing with life's other stressors. It's easier to be kind, funny, more relaxed when that weight is lifted. How many times did you feel dread at the thought of getting ready for the meeting or field service, while also saying at the same time how wonderful and what a privilege it was to be a witness. That kind of cognitive dissonance isn't pleasing to experience. All those conflicts, all those stressors and pressures -- gone. I don't take any of it for granted. I feel so very profoundly fortunate to have gotten out.
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  LongHairGal

  LOGAN'S RUN:

  Congratulations on your "fade". I remember feeling so relieved when I stopped going to meetings.

  It was great to stay home at night and watch CSI, instead of being out on a cold night after a tiring day of work...I remember the senselessness of it all. Here I was, dead tired, listening to nonsense and waiting for it to be over so I could go out to my cold car and head home...On weekends, I could catch up on sleep instead of being at a place I did not want and around people who meant nothing to me and vice versa.

  Just remember to screen your calls and do not answer your door.
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  Iown Mylife

  A vivid memory I have, is a meeting where the point of the talk was stress relief. "Many people think they should attend fewer meetings to lessen the stress they are coping with. But it's not the MEETINGS causing stress, it's all the other things in your life you are trying to get done! Just let all those things go and the stress will be alleviated."

  Things like paying your bills so you can have AC and electricity and your kids can go to the orthodontist and have food on the table?

  "Oh sister, you are lacking faith in Jehovah!"

  Really? That's funny, because I just can't remember the last time Jehovah paid my electric bill.

  How about eliminating meetings so I can work more hours every week and earn more money and still have twice the energy left at the end of the day - because of NO MEETINGS.