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Motherhood and Homemaking
I feel like Ive wasted my life," said one mother whose last child had recently
left home. "Ive given the best years of my life to bringing up my family while
other women have been making a career for themselves. And what do I have to show
for all my efforts? Nothing."
I think that many women these days feel the same way. They have been influenced
to believe that their role as mothers or homemakers isnt as important or as
fulfilling as is a place in the business world.
Are their feelings justified or not?
First, one answer to this question depends on your attitudewhich is how you feel
about your role and responsibilities. No matter what your work is, if you feel
it is insignificant and distasteful you will be bored and depressed by it.
For instance, could anything be more boring than sweeping and cleaning floors
every day of your life? Murray Spangler was a custodian in a department store in
Canton, Ohio, and he didnt think so. Even though the dust badly affected his
breathing, Spangler didnt leave. Instead, he decided to work out a better way to
clean floors. "Instead of stirring up dust with a broom," he thought, "why not
suck it up?"
The result? He developed a crude but workable vacuum cleaner. He then decided to
manufacture it with the financial backing of a friend. The friends name just
happened to be H. W. Hoover.
Second, finding fulfillment in ones work or lot in life depends on whether or
not one accepts it.
To reject our role or even have mixed feelings about it is to invite frustration
upon frustration. Even normally enjoyable tasks can thus become a burden.
However, the opposite is also true. When we accept our role, even dull tasks can
become meaningful.
To do this we need to stop listening to the opinions of others and see the
importance of what we are called to do. Every persons work is importantfrom that
of school teacher to student...from house builder to homemaker...from scientist
to farmer...from ditch digger to doctor...and from mother to manager.
However, there are few jobs, if any, that carry as much significance as that of
being a mother. She, more than anyone else, shapes the character of children who
affect generations to come.
Third, fulfillment is to have specific goals.
What keeps me enthusiastic about my job is not my workbut my goals. To imagine
any job without drudgery is fantasy. True, I'm not a mother but I do believe the
same principles apply.
For instance, some of the toughest work I ever did in my life was digging the
foundations of my home. About 70 percent of the digging was in solid rock. The
remaining 30 percent was in hard, dry clay. It was unbearably hot, the
temperature at 110 degrees. To get the job done I had to hire a heavy
jack-hammer. By the end of the day I could hardly even drag that jack-hammer,
let alone lift it. I ached all over. My arms throbbed for weeks. But in spite of
the pain, I was excited about doing that job. Why? Because I was building my own
home
It was important to me, so it was easy to have a positive attitude. Plus I had a
specific goal and a clear vision of what I wanted to do. I could already see the
finished project. It was indelibly etched on my minds eye from the moment we
decided to build. Thats what kept me going until the house was finished, which
took several years.
Its the same with my everyday work. The thing that keeps me going is my attitude
toward my job and my goals. I believe that what Im doing is important. And with
my goals I constantly visualize what I want to achieve. Without this attitude
and without specific goals to work toward, I get bored and discouraged. I also
find that I need new goals to keep me challenged and interested.
Mothers also need to have goals. What greater achievement in life could anyone
wish for than to know that you have invested your life in raising happy,
emotionally and spiritually well-adjusted children?
Fourth, if a mother or homemaker accepts her role does this mean that she
shouldnt work outside the home? Not necessarily. Its a matter of setting
priorities. In this day of so many modern conveniences, many women have time on
their hands. It is therefore important for them to develop their other talents.
When some of these abilities arent being developed and used, a lack of
fulfillment results. Its a case of accepting the importance of both roles and
putting first things first.
Even with housework, mothers need to have priorities. One mother I know whose
children have grown up said, "If I had my time over again, I wouldnt worry as
much about my housework but would spend much more time with my children. Thats
the most important thing to do, as all too soon they were grown up and gone."
It is also important that mothers who do not work outside the home realize that
the role of motherhood is not a life-time job, and that it is wise to prepare
for the future. A wise mother will ensure that she will have something
fulfilling to do when her children dont need her so much, or when they leave
home.
Fifth, to feel fulfilled, people need to feel appreciated. Motherhood is no
exception. Even the most mundane tasks can be rewarding when people know that
they are appreciated.
So, husbands and children, let us never take our wives and mothers for granted,
but express our gratitude for everything they do for usfrom mending socks, to
washing dirty clothes, to cleaning the floors, and preparing our meals day-in,
day-out, year-in year-out . . .And lets show this appreciation by helping all
the time
JanG