Do you have a friend you would like to get out from the WTS?

by freedom96 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • freedom96

    I have faded out. I still have just a handful of friends that are still involved, and we just don't talk about religion. They have no idea what I really think about it all. Usually don't see them too often, so it isn't like they are a huge part of my life. I have not been df'd, and I will not bow down to their crap and da myself. Why should I put a label on myself that they created? I know some feel the need to do so, but I don't. To each their own. I am not judging.

    But, I have one friend and his family that I would love to see get out. I hang in there, hoping he will see the light one day. He is smart..... if only his computer would do some research for him.

    Another friend of mine I communicate with is df'd. He greatly appreciates my friendship and loyalty regardless of what the WTS says. He still believes it to be the truth, though he has had some challenges with it. I am not in a position yet to tell him the truth about it. I have to feel him out, and it will happen eventually.

    Most importantly, my under age child is still involved with my ex. As time goes by, he will become more mature and understand more about it.

    These three I would do anything for them to see the light and run away from the organization.

    Do you have any friends that you are hanging in there for? Will you ever be able to get them out?

  • breal

    Many years ago I thought of the people I missed due to being DF'd after leaving the "truth", however since I did not leave for doctrinal reasons so much as emotional ones I never really thought about trying to get anyone "out". I wanted to have them experience the positive changes that happenned in life after I left but hoped they would find happiness with there choice to stay as JW's.

    Now time has passed my sibling has left, and apparantly other people I know are questioning things... after so many years I find it hard to discuss the org or JW's with them - maybe because I did not discuss my thoughts about it when I left but also because there is a bit of resentment for them having shunned me for so long and now it is another thing that divides.

    I have been enlighted by others posts here about many things so perhaps my opinion of the "org" is changing but for the past 10-12 years I simply wished that the organization was really voluntary - ok to join and ok to leave -no shunning.

  • Guest 77
    Guest 77

    F96, I agree with you about this labeling, it's such a nuisance. As to your question, NO. I believe in minding my own business. I have things to do and contend with than be to involved in someone's belief system. I would never have gotten where I am if I spent my time preaching against the witnesses. Do you remember the Kingdom song, 'Move Ahead?' Well, that's what I've done.

    My mom and oldest daughter are witnesses and we never make an issue when they come and visit. I believe people have a thinking abilities, they just need to use it. If and when someone asks my why I left, I tell them straight out, 'lack of love'. I keep a busy life, and as such I'm content.

    I told this story before, I stayed in contact with a brother who faded away some twenty years. He finally returned, he presently knows my status and you know what, he has never once called me. I'm the one that still stays in touch with him! I'm not sadden, just let down, however I don't make an issue out of it.

    I do however undstand your point of view. Since you asked the question, I gave you my view.

    Guest 77

  • marsal

    My sister is fading but still believes it's "the truth". Whenever I am around her, I try to plant a seed of doubt about the organization. I think telling her too much at one time would be too overwhelming for her.

  • Hamas

    It is a shame that, even after so many years, people still actually believe in the mutterings of the so called Faithful and Discreet slave. This is a lasting testiment to their control over so many people, even those that have fallen away after so many years.

    I wouldn't say I have 'friends' still in the Watchtower, yet I would say I have aquantancies. I used to think I had friends in the Watchtower, yet they have shown their true colours in their actions towards me since I have decided to call it quits. I used to be incredibly close to a Witness in my congregation, to the point where we could even guess what each other is about to say. As a laugh, we always used to parallel ourselves to Simon and Gurfunkel, adamant that one day we too would end up like the infamous pair. Since I have left, our strange predictions have become spot on. Friendship works both ways, and since I have left I have kept trying to contact him, to no avail.

    The work in our relationship seemed to me like It was only being done by me; I can't remember one time since I have left that he has bothered to call me as he used to. I have a strong suspicion that Watchtower mentality has taken a grip of him, thanks to 'wise' counsel from the elders.

    I would love him to see the light and come away from the Watchtower, but since I have started planting seeds his mindset has become even more dubya-like. Whilst we were good friends, we always used to mention how boring or crazy some parts of the meeting were. However, when I question him about it now, I simply recieve an ignorant 'It was great!' . In fact, it was he who created one of the worst expressions I have ever heard from a Witness :

    You cannot blame God for the mistakes HIS organization makes !

    In my opinion, to break someone free from Watchtower bondage the best strategy of attack you could possibly employ is to attack the doctrine of the Faithful slave. Remember, without that, the Watchtower crumbles. Yet I have tried this method, as I did on my own mother which, thank God, freed her from 35 years a Watchtower slave - I have tried this method on this person yet to no avail.

    I guess some birds are meant to be caged. We can all be glad that we had the mental capacity to free ourselves from Watchtower bondage, and we should all strive to do the same for others.

  • outnfree

    Yes, I do.

    If you're out there, Dee, I'd love to hear from you.


  • mouthy

    If Annmarie ( my daughter) Vanessa & Heather( my grandchildren) Rosilie, Sylvia Adams. Glennis,
    Heisterman, ever lurk... I love ya! I miss ya!! Hope one day I can hug ya again......Pray for ya nightly........Grace,Mum,Nanny,

  • blondie

    The role I played in my dysfunctional family was enabler and rescuer. I've done that for too many years and learned it was hurtful to me and did not really help anyone else. I figure that I will be here to help after they travel that part of the road they need to do by themselves.


  • Trotafox

    Yes, I do. But as Blondie said, she is going to have to travel the road out herself. Personaly, I don't see it ever happening, either


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