Thanksgiving Dream List
1. I give THANKS to Mom, for the blond wig and dress when I was a child (pinch-hitting for the daughter I was meant to be). It was a voyage of self-discovery for me to play cowboy, Tarzan, and Superman in drag in my neighborhood--completely unwitting to my astonishing spectacle presented to the neighbors! Guess how surprised I was to discover how not cool that was!
2. I give THANKS to Johnny Sauce, the elementary school bully, who tormented me non-stop until that fateful moment in the Boy's restroom (pushing me into the urinal and flushing it repeatedly) when I snapped, turned and smashed his bewildered face. From that moment forward, you couldn't have been nicer to me. I found my self-respect because of you.
3. I give THANKS to my 7th grade English teacher who promised extra credit for learning and reciting poetry in class. My recitation of all 143 verses of Rime of the Ancient Mariner made me a superstar in the eyes of my classmates.
I found power in words worked wonders for me.
4. I give THANKS to art teacher Aubrey Mayhew. You forced me to abandon my Business, Accounting, and Short Hand electives to transfer into Commercial Art classes. You gave me a glimpse of what my natural talents are and advised me toward a career in Art rather than a lockstep clerk in an office the rest of my life.
5. I give THANKS to my 1st best friend, Johnny Santa Cruz, who turned my world upside down in every way. You modeled an outgoing, friendly temperament for me to study and imitate until I could fake it to make it my own. You taught me about the Bible and invited me into your religious organization and helped me hone my public speaking skills, study habits, and rebuttal talents. Neither of us knew it was a cult. Well, dammit--it IS A CULT.
You are dead now and remained faithful to the end despite all our conversations, debate, and exasperated heart to heart talks. You and I will always be best buddies even though you stopped talking to me. I understand. It's an F**KING shame is all I want to add.
6. I give THANKS to my "Brothers" in Federal Prison who were closer and more dear to me than life itself. We were there out of conscience and trod willingly (we thought) a road paved with good intentions. Yes, we were useful tools--but our love was real. None of us kept in touch after parole, of course, we were swallowed up in the race to the End of the world.
7. I give THANKS to Issac Asimov, Ray Bradbury, John Steinbeck, Mortimer J. Adler, Ayn Rand, T.E. Lawrence, Steve Allen, Orson Welles---my intellectual heroes growing up, inspiring me to develop talent and intellect and craft my writing and speech to thoughtful and precise and---entertaining and outrageous.
8. I give THANKS to Dimitri Tiomkin, Maurice Jarre, John Barry, Elmer Bernstein, Miklos Rosza, Franz Waxman, Lalo Schifrin, Claus Ogerman, Antonio Carlos Jobim, Frank Sinatra, Matt Monro, Jerry Goldsmith, Ennio Morricone, for being the pilot light in my soul, the comfort for my many broken-hearted hours on Earth. You are my music heroes.
9. I give THANKS to my children, Laura, Jason, Vanessa, Terry, Nicholas, Lillian, and Helena who are the only greatness I've ever truly experienced as beloved, cherished, and eternal souls forever bonded by love. The best part of life, the truest exemplification of the divine, and a never-ending wellspring of Hope for the future.
10. I give THANKS to my Ex-JW Brothers and Sisters who've had the enormous courage to wipe the Watchtower off their ass and commence a New Life with a totally revise World View--from scratch.
To those who have posted here and read my scribbling for over a decade--I tip my hat, bow my head and say a self-prayer of sincere gratitude.
P.S. I dreamed this list as I lay sleeping last night. When I awoke, I wondered: "Why not post it?"