What I Have Done Lately

by RAYZORBLADE 5 Replies latest watchtower beliefs


    We all know the WTBTS policy on shunning, especially when you have either been disfellowshipped/disassociated.

    First off, because of this forum and a multitude of comments made by its members, I was able to come to some sort of resolve.....yes, even after almost 20 years away.

    So.....as it was pointed out numerous times by a few, because I am no longer a JW, why should I cater to their mindset, correct?

    They shun me; I don't shun them.

    When I first left, the mentality I had was: DO NOT CONTACT THEM (other JWs). I went one step further, even as an XJW - I wouldn't talk to other XJWs. Isn't that wacked?

    SO...in the last month or so, I have been pouring through names and addresses from many, many years ago, cross referencing them on-line via 411.ca - and I've been sending one or two of them a card/note to say: "Hello". I have not been furtive with these individuals, I acknowledge that they may be (?) Jehovah's Witnesses; I am no longer one of them.

    After 19 to 20 years, how do I know who is still a Jehovah's Witness or not? I mean really, how am I to know?

    Do I have any uneasiness? Not anymore. I used to, even just slightly when I first came on to this forum. It's their rules: NOT MINE!

    Thanks to so many, the list would be a thread unto itself.

    I am mailing off two more cards this afternoon.

    I'll let you know what happens.

    Oh, if only 1 would reply positively, I'd jump for joy.....but I am not getting my hopes up.

    Any experieces by anyone as of late similar to mine? Thanks



    because I am no longer a JW, why should I cater to their mindset, correct?

    Insightful, Razor....I believe this is an important step on the path of healing. I remember when I realized that. It is really very freeing, isn't it?

    I'm sooooo prouda you!!!

    Love ya, Razor!!!


  • Aztec

    I haven't done so myself Rayzor but, I think it's a good idea! I should look into that myself. I wonder sometimes what my best childhood friend is up to. When I was 19 I was making my exit and she, like so many others I knew, was getting married! I have another friend who I think about sometimes. She was extremely smart, at the top of her class. She didn't even wait until she graduated to get married! I should try and find out where they are and if they are still dubs. I would be interested in hearing if any of them contact you. :D ~Aztec

  • Scully

    I haven't had much occasion (nor any desire really) to look up old JW contacts lately. However, I had a really interesting thing happen a couple of years ago that made me go Hmmmmmmm.....

    I was taking a summer school Pediatric ER course at the local college, and happened to befriend one of the other ladies taking the course. We went to lunch break together one day, and who should see me but a JW girl that I worked with for a year or so back when my daughters were infants. We hadn't seen each other in years, but she was kind of reluctant, and I guessed it might have been because she was DFd. I just said, "Don't worry about talking to me, I'm safe!!" So she sat down with us and we began chit-chatting and catching up and talking about the courses we were taking.

    A few minutes later, a fellow from my former congregation showed up too. I knew he was "inactive" because he'd had Mr. Scully do some work for him, so I invited him to join us with his lunch and introduced him to the ladies.

    Finally, the girl who was from my class said "Were you guys all Jehovah's Witnesses? So was I!!" She had recognized a "buzz word" and realized what we all had in common.

    I was just amazed as we all started comparing our "war stories" about the JWs, and how similar they all were. We'd all left at around the same time, and all of us cited "lack of love" as being at the root of our dispute with the organization, the doctrinal issues came later. It made me realize that there are far more people LEAVING the JWs than there are JOINING them. And that is a good thing, IMO.

    Love, Scully

  • StinkyPantz

    Ray, I think what you are doing is cool. What if you contact someone who is doubting or who has just left and they need your support? Well, you'll be a breath of fresh air. Once I get to Florida, I am considering doing the same thing. Good luck!!

  • be wise
    be wise
    and all of us cited "lack of love" as being at the root of our dispute with the organization, the doctrinal issues came later.

    Yep! Scully, I can vote for that! The organisational issues were just the icing on the cake for me!

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