I wanted to introduce myself. I am a Jew, not ex JW. As a practicing Jew its sad to see hebrew scriptures, distorted and used by non-hebrew people hijacking my Bible (Jw), then used to justify their pedophile actions. Having said that, sometimes I even believe in God, but in Judaism belief is not a requirement, and blind commitment to any "ultimate" truth is not a Judaic concept. We question everything.
I am an unexpected dad because 3 1/2 years ago I met my daughter. I need to be careful to maintain her identity, but she is the most amazing kid I ever met. I am in communication with her parents when needed. She is ex Jw, basically shunned/shamed by her parents and community who "love her so much, and just want to be w her in the earthly paradise" But of course that can't happen because she is gay. Pulled out of school when she came out. Suffering the the shame of being rejected by her whole Jw community. Her father was demoted in whatever upper roll as a Jw that he had, and she was eventually booted from her house. When she was a child she was repeatedly drugged and molested by her Uncle living in the home and apparently some big-wig in the church. Apparently the uncles son found out and wanted in on the action, so then she was repeatedly molested by her cousin. She finally cracked and it came out. No police were called, and it was decided to be handled by the elders (which I believe is what the uncle was and still is). Someone leaked the info to the police, but the pschychiatrists decided it would be too traumatic at this point for her to testify. When I first met her, she was broken, suicidal, and with no car after almost losing her life in a car crash. No way to get to school after having paid the whole lump sum that she saved up with all her own money. After the car crash, they put her dog in a kennel, and she couldn't get it out until she could pay. All this in a different state from her familly and support network. One reason I believe more strongly in the possible existence of a higher power is that somehow, at just the right moment the universe brought us together when this poor girl, crying, was trying to throw out her trash at the dumpster at night at the exact same time and my parental instinct kicked in and I was astounded how this kid just survived a car crash, and where were her parents for God's sakes. Why were they not immediately on a plane. Im still not sure what happened but somehow the universe gave her a 2nd dad, and gave me a more wonderful daughter than I ever could have amagined. She calls me her dad, and tells a her friends im her dad. Since then ive become a champion for the LGBT cause (im not gay but, now having a gay daughter, I can tell you She was BORN that way and is divinely created to be the person God made her to be), and supported her search for her own spirituality no matter how different than it is from mine. Now don't get me wrong, she can be an all out stinker like any kid her age, but she is my daughter. Of that there is no doubt. It amazes me, that I'm not related to her in any way, and think she is the best daughter when her very own biological parents reject her. As jews we practice Tikkun Olam, repairing the world here now, not hyper focused on some future paradise that probably won't even happen. If I ever thought my faith considered fealty to the devine more important than love for ones family, I would drop Judaism in a heartbeat. To me hell would living in a future when you realize you traded your daughter for a fake ideology. One time in the hospital where she found out she had a kidney stone, and just had another rejection text from her bio parents, she was crying and grabbed my hand, and she squeezed and said the most peculiar and wonderful thing. She looked me seriously in the eye and said, "Dad, I hope you know I need you as much as you need me.". It made me cry. What a tough wonderful kid.