Iraqi Information Minister Tells The Truth!

by SYN 1 Replies latest social entertainment

  • SYN

    08-04-2003, 09:05

    Iraq's Information Minister said Tuesday it has no intention of surrendering to US forces which have seized parts of Baghdad. Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf said Iraqi troops had the situation under control. Speaking under slight duress as American and British forces stormed the small suburban home that had been occupied by his Information Ministry officials, al-Sahaf said:

    "We are going to tackle them and going to destroy them, we will not surrender," he said. "The US will surrender or we will burn their tanks." Gunfire broke out after he stopped speaking, and an invading soldier trod on the microphone cable, but stopped and said, "Erm, sorry mate."

    Immediately after these words were spoken, a huge shell exploded behind the dining room table, scattering vital documents all over the place and causing several invading British soldiers to run into each other, resulting in exclamations of "Blimey!", "Buggrit!" and even "Nobody said the Arabanoids would use weapons of mass paper destruction against us!"

    "Baghdad is bracing to pummel the invaders." Al-Sahaf exclaimed, as invasion forces scuffled and rescued one of their comrades from a giant pile of municipal electricity bills. "We will find the holes the infidels are hiding in, and throw incredibly potent samoosas into them! Glory to Saddam!" Al Sahaf screamed, ducking to avoid covering fire from invading forces who had discovered the hired help hiding in the kitchen, possibly holding small kebabs in the folds of their clothing.

    He said US troops were "isolated and bombing from a distance" and in an "hysterical state". "Look, they can't even tell the difference between Iraqi soldiers and garden gnomes," he said, pointing out the devastation in the small, very untidy garden outside, which had recently been shelled to dispose of dangerous-looking garden gnomes which were previously believed to have been holding fishing poles. "I suppose the fishing poles do look a bit like guns from a satellite. Die, infidels! We will have victory!" he was heard to scream as the dining room table was finally conquered by a tank, which rode over it and stopped in front of the kitchen door.

    Don't you guys also think that this dude is a bit...strategically challenged?

  • Erich

    Okay, US-troops will win. They are in the strong position to bomb Iraq and Iraqian people down into the dust.

    But can you imagine a time - in a near or far future - where US-soldiers could win the hearts of Iraqian people? Can you?

    How many soldiers have to remain in Iraq year by year? 200 000 ? Or a half million? Or one million? Who should pay this?


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