Strange doings at the Market

by ctrwtf 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • ctrwtf

    So I recently made a trip back to my home town to visit some extended family still in. The whole trip was very awkward. For a whole bunch of reasons I won't bore you with, we stayed in a Hotel near where the family lives, maybe as kind of a barrier to being in constant contact with the cult mentality.

    Being a very early riser, I went to the grocery to pick up a few things. Because this is an area that I grew up in my JDAR was up and running at peak performance. I came across a clerk stocking some shelves and with her back to me I excused myself and asked for directions to an item. As she turned I immediately recognized the face from a long, long time ago.

    I went to pick up my item and as I returned, I made a brief introduction. I'm sure she wouldn't have recognized me because it's probably been 30 years or more. I asked how her parents were because they were great friends with my parents. We used to go camping as families together and to each others homes for dinner. Did I mention that this lady and her mother were DF'd for apostasy? Or so I was told i should add.

    Here's the part that left me dumbstruck. She denied ever knowing me or my parents. She denied ever having parents named ________ and ________. Or a sister and brother named________ and ________.

    I apologized profusely for my "mistake." This, even though her nametag positively ID'd her.

    I obviously felt very bad for having intruded on her life from out of the blue. I feel very bad for probably dredging up something she would rather have kept buried. But today, I'm wondering what drives a person to deny their parents? Or, what makes them so deeply guarded that a brief encounter with a long ago friend shuts them down?

    To me, it's a testimony to the horrific powers of the cult mentality to deeply psychologically wound someone. The scars from which we will bear forever. Next time, I'll be more cautious about those I approach.

  • under the radar
    under the radar

    Very strange indeed. Is it possible she denied them in the sense that "they are no longer my family" and was not actually denying the biological connection? It's even weirder that she denied knowing you, when you clearly recognized her. Curiouser and curiouser...

  • OneEyedJoe

    Does she know you're not a JW? If she's left, i can see her denying knowing you just to avoid getting sucked back in to a JW conversation - if she thinks you're a JW she'd probably be expecting to get questioned about the congregation, etc and all the standard nonsense JW talk. Depending on how much trauma she's left with from the cult, it seems entirely possible that she just wants to leave it in the past and not have someone dredge it back up.

  • WingCommander

    Maybe it's a testament as to how her family life TRULY was while she was growing up? So bad, that she has completely removed them from her life and denies their existence? Wouldn't be the first time I've heard of such.

  • ctrwtf

    One Eye Jo I thought about that. I guess I assumed that if you're DF'd and someone says hello out of friendship then that's a signal that they don't care if you're DF'd. This is however an assumption, quite a few of which I've made in error recently.....

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