Letter to a JW

by TheOwl 8 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • TheOwl

    So my grandparents got a letter from a JW. They have gotten these kind of letters over the years and they always give them to me and this time I got fed up and I wrote the guy back. Just wanted to post my reply letter in case anyone could use a chuckle on a Sunday morning. I am aware that the JW who actually sent the letter will probably not read the reply I am sending because the return address is nothing more than a P.O. box and they get spooked easily by criticism.

    Here's the letter.


    Dear Paul (or whichever elder at the Kingdom Hall has the key to this P.O. box),

    Please stop writing letters to [my grandparents] at [their address]. They are not interested in the nonsense that Jehovah’s Witnesses continue to peddle year after year.

    As you may know or may not know, Jehovah’s Witnesses have made false predictions about when Armageddon will arrive. Depending on how old you are, you may have lived through these failed predictions yourself. Alternatively, you may want to consult www.jwfacts.com to acquaint yourself with what the Watchtower was publishing in the 1960s and 1970s regarding Armageddon arriving in 1975. I would strongly urge you to do your research when it comes to Jehovah’s Witnesses, and that does not mean searching through the Watchtower Library on CD. Jehovah’s Witnesses have been wrong for decades and will doubtlessly continue to be wrong for decades more.

    In real terms, this means that Armageddon will never arrive. For the rest of your life, you can continue to waste your time sending form letters and knocking on doors and standing beside literature carts while people ignore you and avoid you. Or you can go live your life on this earth which is the only life you will ever have. Enjoy it. Make the most of it. Do what you want for a change.

    The Governing Body is misleading you. They live comfortable lives in a lakeside resort drinking expensive liquor when they aren’t traveling internationally on your hard-earned money:

    That’s Tony Morris III buying multiple bottles of Macallan Whiskey Single Malt for $90 a pop at Bottle King, a liquor store found near the Warwick Bethel. Search “Bottlegate Tony Morris” on YouTube if you want to see the footage.

    Now, I know that you maintain territory cards of some kind which contain Do Not Call lists. Please add [my grandparents] to the Do Not Call list.


    An apostate (booga booga booga)

    P.S. I searched for [your] Kingdom Hall on www.jw.org but found that the congregation no longer meets there.The slave ordered you to share the Kingdom Hall in [a nearby town]? What a bummer. A slave who gives orders is still the funniest thing to me. You should read George Orwell’s 1984.


  • AudeSapere

    Slim chance that anyone collecting the mail at the PO Box will read the letter.

    But I did. And I did get a little chuckle from it.

    Aude Sapere (Meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Understanding; Dare to Think for Yourself)

    (booga booga booga) LOL

  • Foolednomore

    Now that's funny.

  • TheOwl

    Thanks guys. I'm going to drop it in the mail tomorrow.

  • Fisherman

    If it makes you feel better, you can write back such a letter as you did. But I just throw out letters or hang up the phone if I’m not interested.

  • neat blue dog
    neat blue dog

    Superbly written, and hard-hitting if they actually read it. Even if someone secretly skims it a seed could take root 😉

  • Smiles

    Yes, dish it right back at JWs, and then serve them up a return visit with more.

  • punkofnice
    Owly - A slave who gives orders is still the funniest thing to me.

    This is by far my favourite line.

    It's a pity it'll go straight in the shredder and viewed as Satanic lies.

  • DesirousOfChange

    Hopefully it's a "seed planted".

    No one single thing causes a JW to awaken. It's a multitude of little things until one of them is the "last straw".

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