by goingthruthemotions 103 Replies latest jw experiences
@cultbegone - after rereading my post I see where there was room to take my statment as all inclusive regarding women. I didn't intend it to be all inclusive and should have added a qualifier to reflect "some women" or even "a few women".
@jwsaughter- yes i agree i have heard of cases where men also use (withholding)sex as a 'weapon' or tool to manipulate. It is not exclusive to women although i would suggest its more common amongst women, though i will admit i have no data to support that.
From Elite Daily, Dec. 31, 2012 (this got 2.3 million "Likes" on FB)
"Below are the methods of properly training your man:
Holding Out: As some really smart guy (who I can’t remember the name of) once said, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Meaning, every time your man fucks up, he should experience some form of punishment. Since beating the shit out of someone is illegal in this country, I’ve concluded a different and somewhat more effective solution. What better punishment is there for a man than withholding sex? I’m not telling you to use sex as a weapon … actually, yes I am.
Although drastic, not putting out will condition him to never repeat the same mistake twice, or at least repeat it far less. Yelling at him can be a temporary solution, but he’ll never actually understand the repercussions of his actions unless he feels truly deprived. Also, if you are feeling a little deprived and think you can’t hold out any longer, go invest in a pocket rocket."
Men may do it (if so, they are equally vile and wicked). Studies show that the majority of women do it. Double exers have perfected it into an art form. And yes, Steve, this does happen in a vacuum. I've experienced it multiple times with multiple ex-GFs, and not one time was it justified. Not once. Try other methods, XXers. Or find a cuckoldable, weak wristed, spineless man to train. Isn't that attractive in a man.
Not me. Not ever.
Again, djs beat me to it. I was about to type similar regarding all the things a woman is not to angry to do, like letting a man pay the bills, work on the car, do yard work, cuddle etc etc etc.
i will also elaborate here, im not talking about a day or two of this, maybe some argument over some petty typical married people nonsense... Im refering to a longer periods of time where intimacy is withheld or neglected. When it stretches into a couple of weeks or more somebody needs to get the hell over it or get the hell out.
DJS: ....using sex as a weapon is the worst thing a woman can do.
Sometimes, that is the only weapon that a woman has to use. In the JW cult, women are disempowered...it is not surprisingly that she will use the only weapon she has. Not surprising at all.
Your wife must want to become intimate with you again on her own rather than because she was pressured, guilted or talked into it.
Exactly. Sex, even within a marriage arrangement, is supposed to be consensual. That is why "rendering the husband his due" is one of the most misogynist statements that can be made in regards to marital relationships.
If women are to be accused of using sex as a weapon, it is because they have been taught that sex is what a man can demand and get because "the bibble says so". The bibble is the weapon that men use to get their "manly" desires satisfied.
Frankly, if I had a husband that pulled that scripture out of his ass to force me to have sex with him, I would tell him to go fuck the bible and leave me alone. Using the bible to force a woman to have sex with him is one of the worst weapons that a man can use. It's pathetic, actually. Pathetic and pitiful.
OC,
"Frankly, if I had a husband that pulled that scripture out of his ass to force me to have sex with him, I would tell him to go fuck the bible and leave me alone. Using the bible to force a woman to have sex with him is one of the worst weapons that a man can use. It's pathetic, actually. Pathetic and pitiful."
I agree.
All the advice i get here is truely helpful.
i know that i am only mentioning the sex part of the relationship...but to me it is the foundation of a healthy relationship and marriage.
it creates intimacy, it creates trust, it creates love....this is the reason so many marriages fail in my opinion.
sex is what drives man kind....it is a beatiful gift from Jesus....the definition of love. you could call it what you want and spin how you want. make it a vulgar thing, make it a beatiful thing. but, make no mistake. it is what makes the world go round!!!!!!!!!!!!! it is whats make marriages work and fail.
if god's willing i will be partaking in sex into my 80's and 90's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
like the saying goes....make love not war. and least of all F%CK the Watchtower!!!!!!!!
and BTW i would never force my wife to have sex with me nor use the bible to that advantage. it's no fun when the other person is not into it.
goingthru: i know that i am only mentioning the sex part of the relationship...but to me it is the foundation of a healthy relationship and marriage.
it creates intimacy, it creates trust, it creates love....this is the reason so many marriages fail in my opinion.
Well, there you go. Now we know what the issue is.
Men have it backwards.
Women want the intimacy, trust and love before the sex act occurs. Men don't bother with all those messy, time consuming acts of love first...they think that it magically happens after their sexual urges are satisfied.
Newsflash! : intimacy, trust and love do not require an emission of bodily fluids. In fact, for most women in marriages, that emission of bodily fluids has to come after those emotional needs are looked after first, not before.
