Little help I'd like to pass on from another cult survivor to me.
Not JW but a violent, physically captive Indian cult.
She says on anger:
It's the longest lasting emotion with have.
It takes at least 90 seconds for it to run it's course once we STOP.
A lot can happen in 90 seconds, and some of the most horrible exchanges and actions happen right after the anger first manifests itself.
We're experiencing FANTASTIC results by just going for a very short walk ( 90 seconds out in the yard or other room ) before continuing the conversation.
When my wife and I come back together we can smile, embrace and congratulate each other for avoiding a horrible day.
Before it even becomes anger, wait 3-5 seconds before making your reply. SLOW IT DOWN!! We imagine there is limited time and we are in some sort of hurry. Not true!
Building a loving and lasting relationship takes constant work.
There are no short cuts, so making time for our lover is top priority.
Have a great day!