How Far Apart Were Your Legs? (page 7)

Dumplin

cofty a day ago

I just want to express my support of this idea Joe.

It's difficult not to suspect the men were seeking prurient pleasure by their actions.

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Parents of teenage daughters know that when there's a falling out between teenage friends, some girls seek revenge by gossiping and betraying. It was during one of these episodes that my wife and I found ourselves in a cold dark back room of the KH with our daughter and 2 elders. She was being accused of an undisclosed indiscretion. I confronted the elders about producing 2 witnesses and the PO proceeded to tell me they decided to pursue it anyway because of the "seriousness of the accusation" against my daughter. (they really do get away with whatever they want) Then, they ask my wife and I to leave the back room and let them question our 15 yo daughter alone. We complied relunctantly because we were always taught to trust these men. Afterwards, my wife told me she would NEVER do that again - leave her daughter alone with strange men. We shivered for about half an hour in the cold, dark KH while the interrogation took place.

Later that week, one of those 2 elders ended the ministry school meeting by asking the audience to "please stand and spread your legs" for the song (instead of "stretch your legs"). Of course all the drones chuckled - but when I heard his faux pas, my stomach hit the floor and bounced back up to my throat! Seriously? What have you been thinking about, brother? looking back now, I know (in my heart of hearts) that these elders had pruient interests when questioning my young, attractive daughter. Sickening, but true without a doubt in my mind. On a side note - not long after that, one of them was run over by a drunk driver and killed. (at the time, I didn't know what to think of it)

Witness My Fury

The chances that faux pas was deliberate are right up near 100% and that just shows the character of some elders. as I was reading your account i pictured one particular elder from my old hall as he was exactly the type to pull that type of shit and did do on several occasions. Yes he would have been one with prurient interest and a huge ego to match it. The kind of man he is can be summed up in the fact he was lining up his next wife while his current one was dying of terminal cancer and married her 3 months after the funeral.

Ass hole.

I wouldnt want to be an elder in Barry right now and to think I very nearly moved there 10 years ago while in and who knows my path may well have been radically different and my name may even have been on the list of trustees by now.

Saltheart Foamfollower

With regard to transcripts - brief notes are taken during the meeting but are supposed to be given to the chairman at the end who will destroy them after everything (eg possible appeal, form submitting) is finished. So there shouldn't be anything stored in cong files - there isn't in mine, but some probably do.

I have been on JCs and have never found it remotely necessary to go beyond asking them to put in their own words what happened. Part of the problem is that the only ones who know what goes on in a JC are the three elders and the accused. Other elders & COs etc don't know, so it is another case of the way the borg have arranged things allowing for horrific practices to happen as outlined earlier. Yes, individual elders are to blame, but so is the organization that has "trained" them.

Can I just add my deepest sympathies to all who have been affected.

SF

Illuminated

My loved one, a male victim of WTS child sexual abuse relayed this information to me. The 3 elders questioning him with details of the abuse while the pedophile sat next to him was not only further traumatizing, but almost as bad as the abuse in itself. Add yet another few layers of trauma with the two witness policy after the interrogation and letting the abuser go while telling the victim they'd be in trouble for "slander" if they warn other people about it.

It's horrifically surreal.

Mickey mouse

I remember finding notes from a JC in my elder father's meeting bag when looking for a kingdom ministry. It was from a meeting with one of my friends. The level of detail was shocking - what she was wearing, details of oral sex and who did what to who. I checked again a few months later and they were still in his bag. So much for confidentiality.

Finkelstein

What one can see from how the WTS approaches sexual misbehavior within its members is that both parties get the going over in accusing judgmentalism.

The victim gets very little empathy and compassion and gone over with in depth scrutiny .

Why ? because both parties are causing reproach onto Jehovah's organization.

This is not how professional people handle these situations, but what do you expect from some poorly educated men reading the 3000 year old bible on how to deal with sexual abuse.

How Far Apart Were Your Legs?