I spent a couple of hours yesterday going over things with a couple of elders, which was decent of them to give me a Saturday afternoon
They wanted to refer to the Watchtower article to find points of agreement and common gound. There were some of course since I still believe in God, Creation and The Bible (at least any doubts I had I was not ready to share at this time)
During the conversation it just became apparrent to me the chasm that existed between us . Their whole thinking was from within the blinkers that a) The Org is obviously right so anything it says has to be believed, and b) Whatever seems "Hard to understand" will soon become clear in Gods due time when he reveals more light.
Even the slaughter of bllions at Armageddon is to seen as Gods wisdom and love to mankind.What sort of persons might those children have grown up to be? another Hitler or Bin Laden ? Leave such decisions to God. They say.
Nothing was resolved. I had secretly hoped they might even take offence at me . I had thinly disguised my use of these websites in the hope they get the point but if they did so, it did not show.
The worrying thing is that a part of me felt drawn towards it again. The sense of purpose, belonging to a group, and having a feeling of special insight and possessing knowledge that the world in general does know - are all powerful pulls especially when it would make family life a lot easier.
But I cannot unlearn what I now know. The flaws in their doctrine, the failed prophecies., and the shenanigans that they have got up to with U N . I could hardly tell others to follow an org. that I knew to be wrong on so many points.
Writing this out has helped me see things again in perspective. I dont expect many submissions under a thread - but it has done me good!
