That’s What Happens When You Leave the Truth.

by John Aquila 17 Replies latest jw experiences

  • zeb

    left the organization, their life became shambles. If married, a divorce ensued. If the person had a great job, the company would lay-off or close. If the person was healthy, they would get cancer or a serious ailment.

    Well we were never wealthy, often lost jobs, were facing eviction, never had a great job and suffered serious ailments and with a handicapped child and that while we were 'in'. what would they say to that.?

    I like to say to any jw I meet when they ask "How are you?" I say and its true, "Well thanks".

  • hoser

    The reason the religion tells horror stories about people who leave the Witnesses is to discourage those who want to exit! It is a defeat for them when people flee the religion.

    I'm sure North Korea says the same about people who flee to the south.
  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    Finally she tells me, “You know, I really don’t care to know anything about the Watchtower. I don’t care if they are a cult, I don’t care if they are the true religion, I just don’t care to know anything about them.

    Thankfully she isn't one of the many who leave the organization and are affected by the lingering guilt or unsureness of whether or not JW's really are " The Truth". Learning TTATT is a must for some of us who were dealing with the residual JW way of thinking.

    While she is telling me this, I am beginning to see that I have missed out on a lot in life. I was really trapped like a slave and didn’t realized that great possibilities were taken away from us when we become one of Jehovah’ Witness.

    Not to mention being robbed of the drive and ambition one has as a young person. When everyone in your little world has you convinced the world is coming to an end at any minute, it pretty much vanquishes the feeling of endless possibilities one has when they are young.

    The only bad thing about this experience is that I can’t relate it to all those JWs that made her life miserable. They are still thinking;

    That’s What Happens When You Leave the Truth.

    Having grown up as a JW and hearing all the X-JW train wreck stories, at first I worried about our life falling apart once we left the Org. in 2008. On the contrary...within months, even though the economy was crashing, I got the best job I ever had (still have it). We paid off our house, my youngest Son got into the University and has a lovely girlfriend and they are both excelling and I have the most peace of mind and calmness, I've ever had. Then the residual JW mindset kicked in from time to time and I'd wonder if maybe Satan was helping me so that I wouldn't return to "The Truth" and go down with "this system". Some JW's that I knew from another congregation came to my door a year of so ago . They didn't know we weren't JW's anymore. I invited them in and we had a nice visit. They were gushing on about how nice the house and garden looked and how good I looked and how happy I seemed and wanted to know what was going on because the last time they saw me I was struggling with severe anxiety. I tried to put them off as long as I could but they kept on asking. I warned them that they weren't going to like my answer but my difficulties with anxiety vanished about a week after I decided to stop being a Witness and I've never been more peaceful and content in my life. This was shocking news to them and the rest of the conversation is a whole topic in itself but after talking to them and listening to their lame rationalizations, I was thankful that I was not a JW anymore. we all know, JW's only talk about the train wrecks because it helps them rationalize their own doubts.

  • Lieu

    Well, that's because JWs equate the Org with God. "If you leave the Org, you leave Jehovah". If you disagree, same thing. Yet who in their right mind would put up with all that negative brow beating?

    The Org is the locked room with the electrified floor. The R&F is the dog. The Org constantly applies shock to the R&F who can't get out of the room. After months/years of being shocked, the R&F (still being shocked) won't leave the room, even if someone unlocks and opens the door.

    They don't seem to get that some may leave because they simply don't like the WTBTS anymore.

    You can't leave us, we love you! Creepy really. Kinda like a crazy abusive significant other.

  • FreeGirl2006
    I had a dub contact me via FB recently. I have known her all her life. I had heard through the grapevine that she is inactive but still very much in dubland. The conversation started with her telling me how sick she is still, how life is challenging. We spent most of the conversation on her (which was fine, I remember being chronically ill and needing a shoulder to cry on). Anyway, she finally asked how I was doing and I answered honestly that life was good and I was happy. She decided she had to go immediately after I said that. No further questions (it has been 9 years since she spoke to me) about what I have been up to. I have not heard from her since. Dubs need that confirmation that life is bad outside the borg, to confirm that their decision to stay put is the right one.
  • ToesUp

    Dubs don't want to know you are happy. It reminds them of how miserable THEY are. They are doom and gloomers and want you to be the same.

    The best thing you can do when you meet up with a JW is have the BIGGEST smile on your face and tell them you are doing GREAT (never better). This response throws them off. They don't know what to think. I'm sure they walk away with all the JW smugness. "Well...I never." Ha. Who cares what they think. YOUR HAPPY and FREE. That's what counts!

  • FayeDunaway
    John your story sounds very similar to a good friend of mine's story. Her life was such a mess and she was so unhappy as a witness, trying to please everyone. She was a true believer but got in trouble with a worldly guy. She saw the elders for what they were, and was traumatized by their questions in the back room. She decided not to come back. She married the guy moved on from the WT and has a completely beautiful life now. She's no longer jealous and bitter. She's self confident and sweet and caring. I can not BELIEVE the transformation. She is the best mother I've ever seen, and her husband is the best husband. Shoot, actually I just realized I could also be talking about this OTHER ex witness woman I know too. She also was terribly unhappy, pinched, frustrated. She went through a hard, brief witness marriage and decided to leave. Married a worldly guy, has two amazing children. Is Girl Scout troop leader, PTA president etc. the transformation in her is also amazing! Smiles are wide, eyes sincere. I've been to my high school reunions and people are remarkably the same over time. The real changes I've seen is the happiness levels when witnesses become ex witnesses!! Maybe that's the real reason you're not supposed to talk to them, the GB wants to perpetuate the myth that lives fall apart.
  • Nitty-Gritty

    It isn’t about a good life in the truth and bad life out of it. There are many faithful JWs who are poor, get cancer, suffer tragedies etc. And there are many who leave who go on to have a wonderful life.

    It’s about choices. Regardless of what you all say, everyone has a choice. JWs choose to live their life with a regard for God and with what they believe are God’s requirements. Whether you want to call that being enslaved to a cult, that’s your prerogative, and your opinion, but JWs certainly don’t view it that way. We all (JW or X- JW) have the freedom to choose how we want to live our life.

Share with others