growing up JW DOES DAMAGE (re-post)

by lisaBObeesa 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • Navigator
    Navigator

    Good Post! But there are those who stay for other reasons. Even though they know the beliefs and practices are wrong, they cannot bring themselves to pay the price for leaving. That price typically includes giving up the only friends and community they have ever known since they have been prevented from developing others. Others can't bear to give up family associations. Then there are those that stay because they are put in positions of power and place that they couldn't achieve in other walks of life. All of my six children were raised as JWs. Their mother was a full time Pioneer and one of the 144,000. Only one remains. He can't leave because his wife is a JW and he knows she will leave him if he does. Those who married JWs have all gone through divorces except that one. They were actively discouraged from going to college since the system was going to end in 1975 anyway. One went anyway and was DF'd. The others did not and found themselves working for people not as bright as they but who had degrees. I'm glad to say that two more are now getting the degrees that they should have gotten 20 years earlier. The task is much harder, however. I understand that the GB has now changed its position on higher education, but too late for my children. The damage was already done.

  • LucidSky
    LucidSky

    Good posts.

    I can say I felt some of those things in small ways during my teenage years. My parents were thankfully not ultrastrict and let me do small things that some of my JW friends never could (at least not in front of their parents). It took me several more years to shrug off the mold that my parents had cast on me. The freedom I have found is exhilarating and exhausting. But at least it's me.

    LucidSky

  • joannadandy
    joannadandy

    Great info!

    I have often had some similar thoughts myself after taking some child psychology classes.

    Like you Lucud, my parents were pretty liberal about letting me do things. I was allowed to join dance, plays, and be on a speech team in middle and high school as long as the material was appropriate, and I didn't spend too much time with my "wordly" counter-parts. If my parents got flack from people they just said the speech was an excellent opportunity for me to hone my preaching and theocratic ministry school skills. I feel very lucky that my parents allowed me to do this, I got a chance to see life outside the borg, something my homeschooled friends never got to do.

  • RunningMan
    RunningMan

    Very interesting post.

    I have often wondered about the prohibition on holidays, sports, dances, and virtually any normal teenage activity. There seems to be very little scriptural support for the ban. My question is:

    Were these things prohibited based on legitimate beliefs, or were they prohibited specifically for the purpose of isolating our young ones?

    This yeilds another question that I have long wondered: Is the governing body a group of evil geniuses, or are they just stupid?

  • SpiceItUp
    SpiceItUp

    <Is the governing body a group of evil geniuses, or are they just stupid?>

    I think I would equate the governing body with Dr. Evil. You know he thinks he's all that but all it takes is one good shag baby and its all over...

    Not to put too much of a light spin on a serious subject.

    Joanna - My parents were a little more liberal as well....I was in theatre tooo....however they are probably kicking themselves now (Of coarse I think I would have left no matter what)

    Spice

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    good post lisa.. Will the Watchtower spies please read & digest.....

    I was a strict JW Mum- yes I feel bad! a daughter brought up that way-dead! a son who left home because of my weird teaching -dead.

    another daughter a stong JW-another daughter who left the borg also- free with me.Thank God I have one left...........

  • LucidSky
    LucidSky

    This yeilds another question that I have long wondered: Is the governing body a group of evil geniuses, or are they just stupid?

    I think most of them are probably blinded by a tradition of loyalty to an organization just like the R&F. Blind leading the blinded. Although I have my doubts about "The Judge." I think he was either demented or sinister.

  • lisaBObeesa
    lisaBObeesa

    Thanks everyone for your thoughts...

    It might sound crazy, but I really think this is a PLAN. I believe people at the top of the org want to control a bunch of people and they have studied how to do that, and they are very good at it.

    Anyway, I went to edit the first post and when I hit submit, the whole post was all messed up! (no spaces between paragraphs, etc... can anyone tell me what I did to mess it up?

    Thanks,

    -Lisa

  • Tinkerbell4125
    Tinkerbell4125

    On a positive note.....

    Even though it hurts to read reports like this, I also feel it's importan to know these thingst. I'm very grateful to be out of the org. I've come a long way and life is good. Just think, what if we were still in the org!!!! I swear, I just can't imagine! I do miss my j.w. and other siblin's, but I'm learning to let go also

    I have found the love in family in other forms, some family, some friends, even neighbors.

    There is life after the borg...and it can be good!

    Tink =;o)

  • eyegirl
    eyegirl

    i do have to say that i somewhat feel like 'damaged goods' at this point in my life. i do appreciate certain aspects of growing up, i know they benefit me as an adult. my parents always pushed me hard to do very well in school and get good grades. even thought i hated it then, i notice a difference now. socially on the other hand, i feel like i'm about 14. since i left it's been a very difficult transition. dating has been not one of the best experiences--very naive and inept. please tell me it gets better? it's nice to know that i'm not the only one who's ever been where i'm at now. thanks everyone.

    beck

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