Order information for book on sexual abuse/JW

by morrisamb 4 Replies latest forum announcements

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  morrisamb

  Hi there! Guess my book will be available sooner than I thought:
  for those unfamiliar with my book I am posting the back cover info. below this announcement. Thanks.

  From: [email protected]

  Sent: Saturday, June 01, 2002
  Subject: RE:
  Hello,

  Are you wanting to order a copy of Father's Touch by Donald D'Haene? You need to either go to our bookstore at www.pdbookstore.com and place an order with a credit card or send a check or money order in US funds. For the correct amount for your area in the world, contact: [email protected]

  Publisher's Direct
  325 East 2400 South
  Salt Lake City, Utah 84115

  If you have further questions, please let me know.

  Thank you,
  Melanie

  Melanie Brandt
  Bookstore Manager
  [email protected]
  *****************************************************************
  Father's Touch is an extraordinary book. I have read many impressive memoirs by survivors of sexual child abuse; many features set this one above the pack. In addition to his fearless self examination, Donald D'Haene presents excerpts from his father's writings that offer a chilling first person portrait of an abuser's denial, distortions, justifications and rationalizations of his crimes. D'Haene details the response (ranging from ignoring the problem through outright resistence to re-victimization) by many segments of the community - religious, educational, police, and the legal system. That Donald D'Haene persisted in his quest for understanding and justice in the face of these obstacles, is testimony to his strength, courage and resilience. This is a book that will stay with you long after you close its covers.
  Mike Lew, Author
  Victims No longer and
  Leaping upon the Mountains

  Imagine this. You are four years old, and you're summoned to your father's bedside to play . . . The Game. Begin then, a decade's journey of sexual exploitation. You and your siblings suffer the manipulations of an abusive religious zealot whose lust for power and control robs your childhoods. Father's Touch portrays much more than a somber memoir. Emerging from this realm of victimhood, the soul of Donald D'Haene draws us upward into the light. In his teens, Donald realized there'd be no triumph without the struggle. His chilling portrayal reveals that sexual abuse, particularly of boys, was and is yet today clumsily handled. Not only did this boy's first authority figure fail him mightily, but so did the various "systems" he trusted — church, police, the courts. Father's Touch looks both back and ahead as Donald recovers the joys of innocence delayed. His narrative leaves readers grateful most of us grew up with "Father Knows Best" and equally grateful he's telling his very different and penetrating story.

  (author web site: www.fatherstouch.com)
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  waiting

  Hey Donald,

  Thanks for the heads up - will wander over this morning to check it out.

  I've enjoyed your posting here - and I know others have too by their comments to you. I hope you hang around as this is such a big issue - more people silenced than I would have ever imagined.

  One way the WTBTS instills silence in it's followers is to constantly and consistently reaffirm that anything negative is really a "rare occurence." Btw, that's not such a new trick as many companies do this too - "Your tire exploded? Why, I've never heard of that!"

  So, when an angry, perhaps frightened victim finally has the courage to speak up to 3 men in authority, when they're told that they've heard of this type of thing, but "Sister, this really is a rare misfortune" - they tend to buy into it. Why? Who wants to think that their Spiritual Paradise is so corrupt as we're finally finding out?

  Rather like an obscene Old Boys Club. Well, women help the myth right along....just to be fair.

  waiting
• 

  morrisamb

  Hi Waiting

  Thanks for your kinds words. Interesting comments about instilling silence.

  I think it is the "caged bird sings" factor, but my siblings and I have an aversion to "required silence". From reading the postings here, that is one characteristic most of us share. I wonder if a majority will agree with me on this: we are forever changed by our experience and we are extraordinarily sensitive to "required silence" in all areas of life. That what we found to be true of the Witnesses, we discover in organizations, not faith based.

  I'll give you some examples in my life...

  ie. When I entered the theatre community..."You can't say that about us. You're one of us..." [One guy even said, 'If I read another negative comment about my performance, I'll have your lights taken out.' That inspired a year of reviewing!]

  ie. When I visited the gay community...."You're too opinionated... We don't do things like that... You can't do anything that might be misconstrued as supporting our fundalmentalist mayor. [With all the persecution I experienced as a Witness, I certainly am not going to 'stone people of faith']

  How about you out there? Can you relate?
• 

  waiting

  WT instilled silence.

  JW's are great at the game of knowing what's really happening in their cong., but then saying "Well, that's not the way it's supposed to be." Therefore, shutting off conversation about the situation.

  JW's also use the slander card strongly - being reproved or df'd works to silence many a victim.

  JW elders also shut down arguments by saying "There's no written directive on this from the Society - so we can't discuss it." Duh. Shut up.

  JW's also know it's up to each of them to protect the reputation of Jehovah's Congregation. Such a burden! They know that the WTBTS says they're the "happiest people on the Earth" and a "clean, spiritual people." So, if they don't want to "make Jehovah sad" - and potentially "loose out on everlasting life" (be killed by Jehovah) - they'll smile and be silent.

  What's your take on it? Being gay, I would assume that you had many a disturbing thought growing up as a jw? I know my son did - and the locals spotted his discomfort - and made it soooo much worse. Worldly kids didn't care - but jw's? Ridicule and damnation.

  Being a jw woman, we're just naturally silenced as we're naturally an "army of workers" - not of any authority. Drones? Orwell's 1984? Upon leaving, I think some of us (including me) find a delicious freedom in discussion on the internet - we can be perceived as equals.

  waiting
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  waiting

  Btw, Donald,

  I just wanted to say that I think it's a tremendous accomplishment on your part for growing up, speaking out, and for having the stamina to write, and then get published, your own work.

  Congratulations just doesn't seem to be quite enough. Clap, clap, clap, clap.

  Some day I hope to write a book where the royalties will pay for the copies I give away. Clarence Darrow

  Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamp post how it feels about dogs. Christopher Hampton

  impressed waiting