Letters of the Governing Body of Israel during the Exodus

by EdenOne 1 Replies latest watchtower bible

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  EdenOne

  Here's a challenge to the creative ones...

  What if there was a Governing Body in Israel during the time of the Exodus or the Judges? What kind of letters would it produce to the rank and file? Bring it on. Here's one example:

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  Paran, 06 Tishri, 1444 BCE.

  To All Tribes of Israel

  It has been brought to the attention of the Governing Body that some brothers have been hoarding Manna, storing it to use in the following day, in disregard of the instructions lovingly provided by Jehovah through our faithful and discreet servant, Moses, on Exodus 20:4, 19: “Let no man leave it till the morning”.

  While an exceptional provision has been made in order that the Sabbath may be fully observed, and thus twice the product can be stored on Fridays, apparently some sisters are undermining their husbands’ headship by collecting and storing an inappropriate portion of Manna with the intention of storing it for usage in the following day.

  In light of this situation, the Governing Body, who now sits on the seat of Moses, has made extensive consideration with prayer and has decided that each residual or excessive portion of Manna that will be inappropriately kept overnight shall bred worms and become foul, followed by an abhorrent putrid stench. This way, each Israelite should learn not to ignore Jehovah’s loving instructions, and keep in line with the progressive organization of God.

  We believe these loving instructions will be beneficial to all as we honor Jehovah's name by being faithful in all things during these momentous journey towards the promised land.

  Please accept our expression of warm Hebrew love.

  Hebrew Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses

  Note to all tribal elders: If any Israelite is found guilty of deliberately disobeying these instructions, and two witnesses can be found to testify of the brazen misconduct, a judicial committee of three elders should meet with the wrongdoer. If no evidence of repentance is found, the impenitent, mentally diseased individual must be disfellowshipped from God’s people by means of loving stoning. The secretary of the tribe should keep this letter in the permanent file.

  Eden
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  prologos

  dear brothers,

  this is in connection with the use of the pegs. It has been noted that you all are good at digging, but not so good at covering up.

  therefore the H governing body decrees two improvements on these procedures of god's clean people:

  Flatten the peg so it is more of a shovel, and

  observe the direction of the smoke from the altar, tabernacle. for your call of nature, use only the area downwind, the one under the smoke.

  these solemn occasions should not be a sweet smelling odor for us upwind. and

  only one sheet of papayrus per sqatting.

  ybthgb.

  PS (BS) our spirit-direction that can see into the future, has reported that you are TOO GOOD at covering up. Not a trace of our 40 years trek, no DRECK or dregs can be found by archeologist of the future digging. sadly, well done, listen obey and be blessed.