Today I dont feel so awesome ....

by Dudu 9 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Dudu
    Dudu

    Today I feel the need to write. It been 3 years out of the borg and my life has been wonderful since then. Updates? I already finished the first year of my masters, I work at a prestigious university in my country, I found a very nice guy whom I am married to. So, what s wrong?

    I came across a picture of an old JW friend and I felt bad for the things I have missed. Two of my ex bf got married and I missed their weddings. I am not in touch with people i spend almost 3 decades of my life. That doesnt feel right at times .... Anyways, I just wanted to share

  • Witness My Fury
    Witness My Fury

    Chin up, you escaped a mind control cult.

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    I think most people go through this about what might have been, at class reunions for instance. I am sure if you took a closer look their lives would not look as rosy.

  • Mum
    Mum

    If JW's could behave normally, you could have been with your old friends. It is not your fault. It's just a matter of knowing what you can control and what you can't. If you have no control, let it go.

    Now, put on some happy music and dance or go see a funny movie. Get your mind on happy things, and shut out the gloom!

  • Crisis of Conscience
    Crisis of Conscience

    Did you get invited and not go to the weddings?

    Or did you not get invited so that you couldn't go?

    If you didn't get invited, then they were truly, sadly, and realistically, never your friends.

    CoC

  • stuckinarut2
    stuckinarut2

    Stay strong.

    the past always looks better through rosé coloured glasses! But the reality is often different.

    you have a great new life, one that has no doubt made you a much better, all rounded person.

    to those that left you behind, I would say that they were never real friends anyway...and certainly not friends that would have encouraged you to 'better' yourself with education etc....

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    I understand what you are saying DuDu...been there...done that.

    Missing your old friends from whom you've been seperated from for one reason or another, is a natural thing but it doesn't mean you've made a wrong choice or that JW's are the "true religion" or that you've actually even really missed out on anything. Chances are, if you'd have been there, you'd have had a nice time but likely it would have been the same old same old. Either way these events are over, they've moved on so have you, no sense looking at the past with regrets when there's no need to.

    It's easy to look at the past or at other peoples lives or even their photos and see them through rose colored glasses. Hopefully you're not making yourself feel badly by projecting romantic notions onto these things. If you had spent your life as a non JW but moved away from your old town or neighborhood you'd be having much the same feelings. The hard part about it as a former JW is that so much of this sadness is so unndecssary and so uncalled for.

    But as you said, your life these last 3 years has been wonderful and that's what counts the most !

  • ducatijoe
    ducatijoe

    I have the same feelings at times. Perhaps that is why I read and post on this site.

    Your life sounds great. As you grow you will make new BFFs and have your own family that will be allowed to chose their own path.

    Bravo

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    Just to fill you in on what you missed:

    • The wedding talk was a WT infomercial and went overtime.
    • The bridesmaids dresses were hideous and almost looked like burkas.
    • One of the toilets in the womens room plugged.
    • The reception was a cheap-ass affair in an overcrowded room with about a million kids running around screaming.
  • Pams girl
    Pams girl

    It's sad for you, but I'm sure the friends you have now show you love that doesn't come with conditions. And everything Pete said....

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