The other guy's beliefs sound crazy--but, not yours . . .WHY?

by Terry 4 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Terry

    WHY is the other person's wacky religious belief so easy to laugh at--but--not our own?

    The Mormon's "magic underwear" for example.

    Many Mormon adults wear garments as a reminder of sacred promises made with God
    in the temple. That's it--big deal. BUT PEOPLE LAUGH AT THE IDEA because those people aren't Mormons.


    Scientologists believe this about Xenu:

    75 million years ago, an evil being named Xenu decided to solve a population problem on his galactic colony by exiling a bunch of people to Earth. When the souls started leaving the bodies, he captured the souls and forced them into a huge implant station and made them watch movies that ‘implanted’ them with false pictures of Christ.

    No big deal. BUT PEOPLE LAUGH at the idea.


    Christians believe in a supernatural carpenter fathered by a ghost and a virgin. No big deal.


    How many of them can you match up with a familiar religious tradition? (The answers are at the bottom.)

    1. The foreskin of [a holy one] may lie safeguarded in reliquaries made of gold and crystal and inlayed with gems--or it may have ascended into the heavens all by itself. ( 2)

    2. A race of giants once roamed the earth, the result of women and demi-gods interbreeding. (1, 6). They lived at the same time as fire breathing dragons. ( 1)

    3. Evil spirits can take control of pigs. ( 1)

    4. A talking donkey scolded a prophet. ( 1, 3)

    5. A righteous man can control his wife’s access to eternal paradise. ( 6)

    6. Brown skin is a punishment for disobeying God. ( 6)

    7. A prophet once traveled between two cities on a miniature flying horse with the face of a woman and the tail of a peacock. ( 4)

    8. [The Holy One] forbids a cat or dog receiving a blood transfusion and forbids blood meal being used as garden fertilizer. ( 7)

    9. Sacred underwear protects believers from spiritual contamination and, according to some adherents, from fire and speeding bullets ( 6)

    10. When certain rites are performed beforehand, bread turns into human flesh after it is swallowed. ( 2)

    11. Invisible supernatural beings reveal themselves in mundane objects like oozing paint or cooking food. ( 2)

    12. In the end times, [the Holy One’s] chosen people will be gathered together in Jackson County, Missouri. ( 6)

    13. Believers can drink poison or get bit by snakes without being harmed. ( 1)

    14. Sprinkling water on a newborn, if done correctly, can keep the baby from eons of suffering should he or she die prematurely. ( 2)

    15. Waving a chicken over your head can take away your sins. ( 3)

    16. [A holy one] climbed a mountain and could see the whole earth from the mountain peak. (1, 2)

    17. Putting a dirty milk glass and a plate from a roast beef sandwich in the same dishwasher can contaminate your soul. ( 3)

    18. There will be an afterlife in which exactly 144,000 people get to live eternally in Paradise. (8)

    19. Each human being contains many alien spirits that were trapped in volcanos by hydrogen bombs. ( 5)

    20. [A supernatural being] cares tremendously what you do with your penis. 1,2,3,4,6,7,8.

    Key: 1-Evangelical or “Bible Believing” Christianity, 2-Catholic Christianity, 3-Judaism, 4-Islam, 5-Scientology, 6-Mormonism 7-Christian Science 8-Jehovah’s Witness

  • Pacopoolio

    I always liked how JWs mocked the Trinity as being illogical and weird.

    Oh and an eternal invisible being that requires blood for sin isn't? One isn't more wacky than the other!

  • AlphaMan

    The 7 trumphets of Revelation were actually conventions of this religion. What is Jehovah's Witnesses.

    In this religion you can't take whole blood transfusions, but you can take transfusions of blood factions. What is Jehovah's Witnesses.

    This religion once demonized the internet, now they promote JW.Org as their offical website. What is Jehovah's Witnesses.

    In this religion pedophiles cannot be ex-communicated without 2 witnesses to the child molestation. What is Jehovah's Witnesses.

    This religion claimed the scarlett colored wild beast of Revelation was the United Nations while itself was actually an NGO of the United Nations. What is Jehovah's Witnesses.

    This religion demonized smurfs in the 80's, claiming one came to life and ran out of their meeting place. What is Jehovah's Witnesses.

    The craziness goes on and on and on........

  • Vidiot

    Terry - "20. [A supernatural being] cares tremendously what you do with your penis. 1,2,3,4,6,7,8."

    That's the funniest one.

    Speaking of which, #5 (Scientology) should be tagged to that one, too; the ideology is homophobic, so it qualifies.

  • prologos

    terry, 18 might be misunderstood by those that do not consider 'paradise' as heaven, but tag the p like panda on earth.

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