Your Emergency Baptism Guide

by expatbrit 0 Replies latest jw friends

  • expatbrit
    expatbrit

    So lets say you're on a camping trip with friend. He's chopping wood for the fire, and suddenly the axe slips and cuts an artery in his leg. He falls to the ground, blood jetting from the wound in a scarlet fountain.

    What is your first action going to be?

    If you said "apply a tourniquet" you are........WRONG!

    In fact, as any good Christian would know, you should prepare for an emergency baptism, in case the poor sap dies in a state of removal from God.

    Here then, brethren, is your "How To Baptize Someone In An Emergency" guide: http://www.kencollins.com/how-04.htm

    And remember, if you manage to perform the full emergency immersion:

    Take measures to avoid inadvertent nudity. Make sure that the clothing you are both wearing will not rise up in the water or become transparent when it is wet.
    Susan: Oh Simon, my leg just tore off in the water!

    Simon: My word, I can see your nipples!

    Expatbrit

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