The Wooden Bowl

by Frenchy 7 Replies latest social entertainment

  • Frenchy
    Frenchy

    Wooden Bowl

    A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess We must do something about Grandfather, said the son. I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence. One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
    --Author unknown

    -Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it-

  • mommy
    mommy

    Frenchy,
    I have tears in my eyes reading that. There are so many people who don't take on the responsibility of the elderly:( Very, very sad. Working in a nursing home I have seen all aspects of family taking care of their parents. It would amaze me the family dynamics that come into play. I used to think that everyone should take on this responsibility, kinds like payback for the fist few years in life, when our parents took care of all our needs. But then as I would see people come into the home with bedsores, malnutrition, nasty infections. Or family members who are so wore out they are unable to function due to constant caretaking. I reallized alot of people are better off in the nursing home.
    Taking the responsibility for a elderly parent is hard. Alot of people on this board may have already been faced with this. I know how heavy it can weigh on your heart to see a loved one almost transported back to the infancy stage, transfering the relationship to child taking care of the parent.
    This is a strange strange world we live in.
    wendy

  • larc
    larc

    Well folks,

    I just turned 60, and took early retirement. I am gathering all this information about by past trusts and long term health insurance, and I'll tell you what. It's damned depressing, reading this stuff. They tell you the three or four things you have to have wrong with you before you can collect on your policy. When I read it I get real bad images. It ain't a real good time thinking about how you might meet the grim reaper All my grandparents were lucky. They died suddenly of a stroke. I know this sounds cold, but I think it's true.

  • Frenchy
    Frenchy

    I don't see anything golden about the golden years...

    -Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it-

  • thinkers wife
    thinkers wife

    Frenchy,
    Thanks for sharing. It brought tears to my eyes too.
    It also makes me wonder where I stand with my parents. I haven't talked to them for a month. And of course, they haven't called me. Some years ago, they made me executor to their will and their living will. Unusual, being that I am the only daughter of four children. They said they knew I would be the one to honor their wishes and not fight about money etc.
    I wonder where I stand with that now that I da'ed myself. Sadly, I would still be the one that would honor their wishes and not fight. But I am sure they probably feel differently now.
    TW

  • Frenchy
    Frenchy

    TW:
    You're welcome. Your parents feel that they are heeding Jesus' words at Matt 10: 34-39 "Do not think I came to put peace upon the earth; I came to put, not peace, but a sword. 35 For I came to cause division, with a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a young wife against her mother-in-law. 36 Indeed, a man's enemies will be persons of his own household. 37 He that has greater affection for father or mother than for me is not worthy of me; and he that has greater affection for son or daughter than for me is not worthy of me. 38 And whoever does not accept his torture stake and follow after me is not worthy of me. 39 He that finds his soul will lose it, and he that loses his soul for my sake will find it."
    I'm sure they are sincere about this and feel that any hope for you rests upon your 'coming back into the flock'. They have been taught that the best thing they can do for you is to hold fast to the 'truth' and hope (they are not allowed to pray for you) that you return. What they are doing, uwittingly, is sacrificing you upon the altar of human reasoning. They are victims of this as well.
    Peace be with you.

    -Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it-

  • amicus
    amicus

    Frenchy,
    I like a story with a happy ending. I fear that in our culture today there aren't too many of these happy endings.

  • Frenchy
    Frenchy

    Amicus,
    I do too. Most of my stories (the one above is not mine) do.

    -Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it-

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