In Chapter 5 of Hassan's book " Freedom of Mind " he discusses building a team in order to help our friends or loved ones eventually exit a cult like Jehovah's Witnesses . But first off there may be errant beliefs even possible team members have about cults or cult involvement that may need to be cleared up. Here are some of those errant beliefs Steve Hassan mentions :
1. " Wy Should I Do Anything ? He says He's Happy ! " Many people say this regarding not helping a loved one escape a cult . Hassan says, " Members of the Heaven's Gate cult each made videotaped farewell statements that explained why they had decided to leave their vehicles-i.e., their bodies- and commit suicide. All of them claimed that they were exercising their own free will, and that they were happy to die . "
" It is unwise to accept at face value a cult member's words that he is happy. In a cult, happiness is often redefined as SACRIFICE or SUFFERING. Happiness in Heaven's Gate was overcoming individuality and human nature and suicide was redefined as advancing to the next level. Ingesting fatal pills with applesauce and vodka, and placing plastic bags over their heads was seen as a necessary stage of the metamorphosis. The CULT IDENTITY was happy to die. But, this cult identity was deliberately concocted to SUIT SOMEONE ELSE'S AIMS. It does not represent the whole individual. You might tell those who are taken in by the cult identity to look behind the smiling mask. When the member says he is happy, the cult self is doing what it has been taught to do. "
2. " He's An Adult, We Have No Right To Interfere " Many say this about not helping a cult member. However Hassan states, " If a friend or family member questions his right to interfere, remind him that HIS LOVE gives him the right to be concerned. If a loved one is under the influence of destructive influence, relatives and friends HAVE THE RIGHT and the OBLIGATION to take steps to undo the process. Once the cult member has an opportunity to learn about and recognize the features of destructive cults, and meet with former members and critics, he will be in a position to make an informed decision. "
3. " He Has The Right To Believe What He Wants To Believe " Some view interferring this way. Hassan states, " Members may seem to be exercising their own free will, but this is an illusion. When people in a controlled environment are subjected to psychosocial influences- like group conformity or behavior modification techniques - they can be manipulated into accepting a completely different belief system. For anyone born into a belief system- religious, political or other- there comes a time when they should challenge and test assumptions. This process applies not just to cult members, It is a necesity for all mature, responsible people. "
4. " He's Too Intelligent To Join A Cult " Many people think this. Hassan says, " Many people have a hard time believing that bright, talented people - often educated, and from good homes - could fall under the control of a cult. They fail to realize that cults intentionally recruit smart people who will work tirelessly for the cause. Many of the former cult members I have met are exceptionally bright and well educated. They have active imaginations and creative minds. They have a capacity to focus their attention and concentrate. Most are idealistic and socially conscious. They want to make a positive contribution to the world. "
5. " He must Be Weak, Or Looking For Easy Answers. He Needs Someone To Tell Him What To Do " Another errant view. Hassan states, " This is a very commonly held , but fallacious , generalization about cult members. People often try to find fault with people who experience tragedy by BLAMING THE VICTIM. Laying blame gives people a false sense of control over their own lives by DISTANCING THEM FROM THE VICTIM. However, the idea that people knowingly join destructive cults is patently wrong. Most cults recruits are recruited at a vulnerable moment, without understanding the forces that are being brought to bear on them. "
6. " She's better Off Where She Is " Another errant view. Hassan states, " Sometimes family, friends, and even mental health professionals will think that a person is better off in the cult. A cult may provide temporary shelter from traumatic circumstances, but cult involvement doesn't cure anyone's problems. It substitutes unethical control for legitimate help. Destructive influence is a form of psychological abuse. In the hands of a cult leader, such techniques can be devastating to an individual's psyche. By inducing a dissociative state and creating a dominant cult identity , cults repress the real issues of the pre-cult and authentic identities. The cult members past problems with family members and friends are used to BREAK CONTACT, rather than to resolve past hurt. When people leave a cult, all of these pre-cult issues, along with the problems caused by membership in a destructive cult , resurface. "
7. " He'll Leave On His Own When He Is Ready " Another common view. Hassan states, " This attitude presumes that the cult member has the resources and ability to leave. One step is to remove the phobias that keep the cult member imprisoned . It is important to try to SPEED UP THE PROCESS because, the longer the person stays in a cult, the more damage is done to the fabric of his life. Former members often express anguish over damage done to their psyches and to important relationships. They feel sorry about lost educational and career opportunities. Even worse, they feel guilty about the people they recruited, the money they collected, and their unethical behavior while members. The longer they stay involved, the deeper the regrets. "
8. " We've Lost Hope " Many familes outside the cult give up on trying to help cult members escape. Hassan states, " Giving up is a dysfunctional coping mechanism. If family and friends no longer believe that the person will leave the group, then, at least, they will no longer be living with dissappointment. Some people have told me that they grieve for their loved one as if he had already died. Negative beliefs can become self-fulfilling prophecies . Family and friends MUST believe that their loved ones will inevitably leave the cult. Hope can sustain and motivate them through the ups and downs of the rescue process. They can build a support system that includes others who have successfully helped their loved ones escape. I have encountered many people like Ray Franz, who left the Jehovah's Witnesses after 60 years. Despite the problems , they are invariably glad to be free. "
So these are the main points brought out in Chapter 5 and other points about building a team to help our loved ones exit. Look forward to any and all comments ! Thanks for your input ! Peace out to all, Mr. Flipper