This weekend my husband got a call from his brother stating his family do not want to hang out with us anymore because we make them feel uncomfortable. He did not even say why. I think my husband was a little shocked and did not say much. I'm not sure if my in laws feel the same way we will find out on Friday our usual family dinner day.
So its only Tuesday but looks like a productive and better week so far. I spoke with my disfellowshipped sister on the phone 1st time and we had a real heart to heart (previous conversation where emails). She was trying to be supportive of me and listen without judgment. She talked about my disfellowshiped dad (who died) and it was nice to hear he was a good man and he did think of me and missed me. So I hope to mend our relationship but taking it slowly. When I talk to my JW family i end the conversations feeling , confused and upset. But I have a conversation with a df sister I really dont know and never had a relationship with and I feel at peace. Is this unconditional and godly love? She forgives me for shunning her and told me if i have the chance do it for someone else in need - that is all she asks. She told me it took her years to get over being shunned and leaving this religion. But she has made peace and is happy. It was nice and comforting to see we both came to some of the same realizations about JWs. She has let go of her anger and does not blame anyone and i want to do the same.
I also had my therapist appointment (got in early). Cried pretty much through the entire session but felt better after. Plan on going once a week.
I also am readying a book on 10 Simple solutions to Worry. Good book so far. I learned that there is 2 types of worry one productive and the other unproductive. Unproductive will not get you anywhere and you have no control over. I told my mom I'm tired of worrying if they are going to shun me or not I cant change what they are going to do. I said it - not sure I believe 100% yet. But I think its a start.
My husbands birthday is tomarrow. We have never celebrated birthday before so kind of feels wierd. But I want to get something special for him.
Just wanted to thank everyone for the support and encouragement.