See, there was a young girl who I met at the post-funeral house party my family held after my aunt passed. She was already a regular pioneer. An elder's daughter, third-gen-JW, but far more dedicated than I ever was. I rarely talked to anyone at the KH, seeing as how 100% of the friendships I had before getting serious about the JWs were non-JWs. Meetings were odd. I ran into either awkward, anti-social personalities, or very snobby personalities who felt special because they were pioneers, well-read watchtower-heads, and ofcourse the sons & daughters of respected elders or other 'renowned' brothers. But I didnt care.
That pretty young girl, like everyone else, was always just 'another person to say hi to' whenever I went to the hall. I mostly talked to older folks, & only a few young 'peers'. But after a while, I began to slowly get attracted to this girl. She seemed....sexy to me. She isn't the supermodel type, but she has this pretty-mary-jane-girl-next-door thing goin' on. Right now I struggle with what I feel because it's too much of a stupid distraction. I feel weird even mentioning it..
But i'm kind of in love with her. Idk what it is. So i've begun to talk to her, off and on, as an 'aquaintance'. I haven't gotten serious and really spent time with her out in service so i don't know her as well as i could. Prayer always seemed like a bigger motivation to me than a girl, but sometimes she can just put a smile on my face. I'm scared if i 'do something' i'll get in trouble being an unbaptized publisher, her being baptized and her dad being an elder & all.