IT'S OVER!!!! Why the Messiah is a greek man (me)

by Naeblis 4 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • Naeblis
    Naeblis

    If you look at bible chronology it is evident that the Messiah must be reborn as a eccentric Greek Male living in Canada. Subtracting 70 years from 567 gives you 493, exactly the amount of points I had in 8'th grade intramural hockey. Cooincidence? Of course not my learned friend. 7 ( a holy number ) plus 1, which symbolizes the ONE Messiah, adds up to 8, exactly the grade my points record was established. The year I was born, 1977, is also biblically significant. If you add all the numbers together, you get 24, which is my CURRENT age, a sign that can only signify the Messiah being reborn inside me that year. Also, those numbers added together gives you 6. Why is this important?? Because as everyone knows, 6 is an "imperfect" number, clearly pointing towards my sinful state.

    IM SORRY PEOPLE. I CAN'G IGNORE THIS.

    NOW WAY

    NO HOW.

    IT'S OVER.

    My hands are tied here, even if I didn't WANT to be the Messiah I wouldn't have a choice in the matter.

    June is the 6'th month of the year, and 30 is the day I was born. 6+3+0 is 9, which is significant because if you subtract from 9 the number 3, which is the time (3pm) that I knew I had become the Messiah, you get 6 again, strengthening the fact that the Messiah must be a sinful man.

    At 3pm exactly, as I was sitting in McDonalds having a Big Mac combo with an extra cheeseburger, I got up to get a packet of Ketchup. As I moved back towards my table, I bumped into a man who turned to me angrily and said, "Watch it Bub, who do you think you are? Jesus??" At this moment I fell to my knees, and mistakenly crushed my Ketchup packet, the Ketchup (catsup) squirted onto the ground and DISTINCTLY made an image of my face. That was when I first started to put together what had happened to me. June (6) the 30'th day, plus saturday, (the 7'th day of the week) added together gives you 43, which when added gives you.......7!!!! The holy number of the bible. Please folks, the only way you can deny this is by closing your eyes, plugging your eyes, and singing showtunes at the top of your lungs.

    IT'S JUST THAT EASY!

    IT'S OVER!!!

    SEE YOU AT ARMAGEDDON!!!

  • Valis
    Valis

    naeb, sorry.... it would have been more convincing if the ketchup had gotten onto your palms and feet, hence stigmata...try Burger King next time.

    Sincerely,

    District Overbeer

  • butalbee
    butalbee

    Naeblis, whatcha been smokin'?????????????

  • noidea
    noidea

    Nae,

    Very interesting, hmmm, slow night at work????????

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    All bow to the Messiah!!!

    I'm hungry. Got any fish or bread?

    Believe in yourself, not mythology.
    <x ><

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