Atlantis or anyone, Publication request

by A question 2 Replies latest jw friends

  • A question
    A question

    Does anyone have the publications listed in this thread?

    Missionary Counsel Booklet (1985), for missionaries

    • Memorandum for Regional Building Committees, for Regional Building Committee members
    • Working Together Safely—Safety Rules and Standards for Volunteer Projects, for Regional Building Committee volunteers
    • District Convention Operations (1997), for Convention Committee members
      • Branch Organization (revised 2003), for branch overseers
      • "Dwelling Together in Unity" (1952, revised 1974, 1982, 1989, 1986, 2004)
      • Standards Manual (2005), for proofreaders
      • Writing for Our Journals, for writers
        • Preparing for a Child Custody Case Involving Religious Issues (1997)
        Direct and Cross Examination Questions in Child Custody Cases (1987)
        "Defending and Legally Establishing the Good News" (1950)
        Family Care and Medical Management for Jehovah's Witnesses (1992, revised 1995)
        • Dress & Grooming for Visitors Touring Bethel (2008)
        • Charitable Planning to Benefit Kingdom Service Worldwide (2000, revised 2004)
        Planned Giving to Benefit Kingdom Service Worldwide (1994)
  • diamondiiz
    diamondiiz

    PREPARING FOR
    CHILD CUSTODY CASES

    WATCHTOWER
    BIBLE AND TRACT SOCIETY OF NEW YORK, INC .
    CABLE WATCHTOWER
    LEGAL DEPARTMENT
    PHONE 17161 675]600
    25 COLOMBIA. HEIGHTS BROOKLYN, NEW YORK 11201 USA.
    _•_
    Dear
    Re : Child Custody Materials
    We have received your request for the packet of court decisions
    and other materials on child custody . It is always saddening
    to learn of problems involving child custody, but we are delighted
    to see that you are continuing to seek Jehovah's guidance
    and protection in all matters and taking advantage of this situation
    to bring further praise to him . (Luke 18 :1-8) We urge you
    to present this information to your attorney as soon as possible .
    If allegations are made that your religious beliefs and practices
    are harmful to your children, the enclosed information may prove
    helpful .
    We particularly draw your attention to the booklet entitled
    PreparingForChildCustody Cases . The questions and other information
    in this booklet should help you and your attorney understand
    the nature of the attack that may be made against a parent
    who is one of Jehovah's Witnesses . in addition, the material in
    this booklet should help you and your attorney prepare for not
    only court hearings but also psychological assessments or evaluations
    that often are required as part of a custody determination .
    It is our experience that the results of such psychological examinations
    can be decisive in the court's award of custody . Thus it
    is good to appreciate the purpose and importance of the psychological
    examination and to present your beliefs as one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses in a way that will benefit yourself and your children .
    -Isaiah 48 :17 .
    It may be advantageous to ask your attorney to present to the
    court certain publications of the Society which may be used to
    demonstrate that your religious beliefs are far from harmful but
    rather are highly beneficial to your children . Depending on the
    ages of your children, you should consider showing one or more of
    the following publications to your attorney : My Book of Bible
    Stories ; Listening to the Great Teacher ; School and Jehovah's
    Witnesses (brochure) ; Your Youth-Getting the Best Out of It ;
    Re : Child Custody Materials
    Page 2
    Making Your Family Life Happy .
    Also, for adolescents, articles
    from the "Young People Ask . .
    series in the Awake! magazine
    present helpful information on a wide variety of subjects . Check
    the listing of "Young People Ask . . ." articles in the Watchtower
    Publications Index 193 0-1985, pages 953-954 . The index of subsequent
    bound volumes ofAanw abke ! checked to cover more recent
    articles in the series .
    You can explain to your attorney that these publications and
    articles contain exc ellent Bible-based counsel and practical wisdom
    which will help your children develop into healthy, happy,
    productive individuals. Rather than containing matter that is
    harmful, these publications and articles provide highly beneficial
    information . Indeed, much of the information is nondoctrinal and
    of universal appeal .
    Along this line, i t may be helpful to show the court that a
    parent who is one of Jehovah's Witnesses will have greater concern
    for his children because of the Scriptural responsibilities imposed
    upon parents . We have found it practical to present the
    court with a copy of one or more of the Society's publications
    mentioned above . Many judges are willing to review these publications
    because of the contents and because of the excellent illustrations
    which serve as effective teaching aids . You may also
    want to point out to your attorney how many copies of these publications
    have been printed as indicated in the opening pages of
    the publications . Since many of them have been distributed in the
    tens of millions of copies, the fact that there are only three
    million Jehovah's Witnesses in the world attests to the widespread
    appeal of these publications .
    We also recommend that you give your attorney copies of Jehovah's
    Witnesses--Unitedly Doing God's will Worldwide and Jehovah's
    Witnesses in th , Twentieth Century . These two brochures will better
    acquaint your attorney (and the court, if necessary) with the
    practices, history, and beliefs of Jehovah's Witnesses .
    Your brothers and fellow servants,
    OF NEW YORK. INC.
    Enclosures
    P.S. Thank you for your kind contribution .
    TABLE OF CONTENTS
    PAGE
    INTRODUCTION
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS
    THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE 1
    SAMPLE APPROACH BY WITNESS PARENT
    TO CROSS-EXAMINATION 11
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS
    FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT 14
    SAMPLE DIRECT EXAMINA'T'ION AND SAMPLE
    RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER 26
    SAMPLE RESUME OF BIBLE STORY BOOK 34
    SAMPLE DIRECT EXAMINATION ANI) SAMPLE
    RESPONSES FOR YOUNG WITNESSES 40
    LIST OF SOURCE MATERIAL-Professional
    Studies in Child Psychology 45
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR
    PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION 52

    INTRODUCTION
    This booklet is designed to help you and your attorney
    prepare for the difficulties Christian parents often
    face in child custody disputes . In the eyes of the law, the
    overriding concern in every custody suit is the welfare
    and best interests of the child . In deciding which parent
    will better provide for a child's best interests, courts will
    examine all aspects of the child's physical, emotional,
    and spiritual welfare in either household . Thus your religious
    practices and teachings as one of Jehovah's Witnesses
    will probably be a subject of inquiry by your former
    spouse and the court .
    Opposers often focus attention on refusal to consent
    to blood transfusions, holidays and birthday celebrations,
    arguing that Witness children are deprived of a "normal"
    upbringing . There is no need to hide or distort your religious
    beliefs and practices in the face of such criticism .
    When giving an answer, always try to focus on the positive
    aspects of your religious beliefs, showing how they
    have benefited you and your family . (Isa . 48 :17) Be sure
    to answer questions regarding such subjects in a way
    that is both understandable and reasonable, accurately
    presenting the wholesomeness of the Christian home .
    -1 Pet . 3:15 .
    This booklet will also help you prepare for psychological
    examinations that frequently are required as part
    of a child custody determination . Having some idea of
    the type of questions a psychologist may ask should help
    you handle the examination naturally and without undue
    anxiety.
    Disputes over child custody can be an ordeal for
    Christian parents . But with preparation and reliance on
    Jehovah, you need not be without hope, knowing that in
    the end Jehovah will set all matters straight .-Ps. 43 :1 ;
    1 Pet . 3 :12.

    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION
    QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS
    PARENT COULD FACE
    1
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE
    Holidays:
    When answering questions about holidays, we want
    to remember that many people view our religion as a litany
    of negative responses . Therefore, whenever possible,
    add some positive statement which emphasizes the benefit
    to ourselves and our children when we refrain from a
    celebration or holiday . For example, rather than simply
    saying, "No, I don't celebrate Christmas," you may respond
    in the affirmative, "After a careful investigation of
    the Scriptures and the historical background of Christmas,
    my family and I concluded that the celebration of
    Christmas was not necessary to have God's approval. We
    have decided not to limit our gift-giving and family
    gatherings to specific predetermined dates, but would
    rather enjoy these activities year round ."
    On the subject of holidays you may face questions
    such as the following :

    Do Jehovah's Witnesses celebrate Christmas?
    Thanksgiving? Easter? Birthdays? Halloween?
    Mother's Day? F'ather's Day? Valentine's Day? New
    Year's Day? St . Patrick's Day? Why?

    Are not your children deprived of the Christmas
    spirit?

    Most of the children in your child's class celebrate
    Christmas . . . . etc.?

    Is it difficult for children to feel different than their
    classmates and school friends?

    So is it difficult for children to be Jehovah's
    Witnesses?

    In fact, is it difficult for you at times to feel
    different and to be one of Jehovah's Witnesses?
    Religion :
    Many try to portray the beliefs and practices of Jehovah's
    Witnesses as dogmatic and restrictive . When
    answering questions about your religious beliefs and
    practices, emphasize the fact that you have formed your
    beliefs and adopted your practices after much study and
    reflection ; your religion is not simply a matter of rules
    2
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE
    which have been imposed by the elders . You want to emphasize
    the fact that you are a thinking, well-balanced,
    and reasonable individual who is competent to act as a
    parent. Avoid any response which gives the impression
    that you are unwilling or unable to provide for your
    child's best interests because of your religious beliefs .
    On the subject of religion you may face questions
    such as the following :

    Do you believe you have the only right religion?

    Do you believe the Catholic (or other) Church is
    true or false?

    Do you believe all false religion is under the control
    of Satan?

    Is the Catholic (or other) Church under the control
    of Satan?

    Are Catholics (or whoever) under the control of
    Satan?

    How do you feel about your ex-wife/husband who is
    not one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Is he/she under the control of Satan?

    What do you teach your child about your
    ex-wife/husband?

    Will God destroy all false religion?

    As one of Jehovah's Witnesses, do you believe that
    only Jehovah's Witnesses will be saved?

    Will all Catholics (or whoever) be destroyed?

    Will you teach your child that his father's/mother's
    religious beliefs are wrong?

    Will you teach your child that his father/mother
    will be destroyed by God if he/she does not become
    one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Will you teach your child that there is a risk that
    his father/mother will be destroyed by God?

    Is it true that there are great differences between
    3
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE
    beliefs of Catholics (or whoever) and Jehovah's
    Witnesses?

    In fact, you left the Catholic (or other) Church to
    become one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Can you be one of Jehovah's Witnesses and a
    Catholic (or whatever) at the same time?
    • If you cannot be one of Jehovah's Witnesses and a
    Catholic (or whatever) at the same time, how can
    you expect your child to be?

    Will you teach your child that both your church and
    the Catholic (or other) Church are right?

    Won't your child be confused by being taught two
    religions?

    If your son was participating in a play or another
    special event at the Catholic (or other) Church,
    would you attend?

    Do you respect all religions?

    If a member of your family was being baptized,
    married, or a family funeral service was being given
    in the Catholic (or other) Church, would you
    attend?

    How is this showing respect for the Catholic (or
    other) Church or your family?

    If you respect all religions, why do you go from
    house-to-house trying to convert people?
    • How would you feel if your child decided he did riot
    want to be one of Jehovah's Witnesses and chose to
    belong to another church?

    Would you still love your child?

    Do you teach your child only about the religion of
    Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Do you believe that your child should learn about
    other religions?

    If your child, out of curiosity, decided he wanted to
    attend the services of another church, would you
    allow him to? Would you accompany him?
    4
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE
    Blood:
    Some confuse our stand on the use of blood and
    blood products with the position of religions that believe
    in faith healing and refuse all medical treatment . You
    want to show that you are a loving, caring parent who
    wants the best medical care possible for your child . Explain
    that you are aware of many serious and possibly fatal
    dangers from blood and that you have made arrangements
    with your doctor to provide alternative non-blood
    management for your child . Acknowledge that your former
    mate properly has a right to participate and have a
    say in any medical decisions involving your child . Stress
    the fact that you want the best available medical treatment
    for yourself and your child and that avoidance of
    blood, in your opinion and the opinion of many in the
    medical community, is a sound, healthful course .

    Do you believe that every word of the Bible is
    literally true?

    Do you teach that it is better to die than to take a
    blood transfusion?

    You claim that there are alternatives ; what is the
    alternative where someone loses blood in a car
    accident?

    How do you know there are alternatives?

    Is it true that only a minority of doctors are willing
    to try alternative, bloodless treatment?

    Do most doctors recommend blood transfusions?

    Isn't it true that it may not be possible to find a
    doctor who will use bloodless alternatives? What if
    the only available doctor said there were no
    alternatives? Would you prefer to die?

    Would you ever consent to your child being given a
    blood transfusion?

    What if the doctors said your child would die
    without a blood transfusion?
    • If the doctors told you that your child needed a
    blood transfusion, would you advise and consult
    your ex-wife/husband?
    5
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE
    • How would you feel if your ex-wife/husband
    consented to your child being given a blood
    transfusion?

    Would you suffer any religious penalty if you or
    your child were given a blood transfusion?

    Would you be subject to alienation or disapproval
    froni chinch members if you or your child were
    given a blood transfusion?

    Would you still love your child, even if lie/she was
    given a blood transfusion?
    Governments:
    The stand which Jehovah's Witnesses take regarding
    governments is often misunderstood . When responding
    to questions regarding your view of government, accentuate
    the positive- you pay all your taxes, you are honest
    and law abiding, you do not involve yourself in civil
    disobedience, and you believe that the superior authorities,
    including court officials, should be obeyed and are
    worthy of our honor and respect .

    Do you believe the governments of this world are
    controlled by Satan?

    Are the judge and this court controlled by Satan?

    Do you believe God will destroy the governments of
    this world?

    Do you vote?

    Do you stand up for the National Anthem/salute the
    flag?

    If your country is at war, would you fight in the
    military?

    1)o you believe that you will be persecuted for your
    beliefs?

    What kind of persecution do you expect and from
    whorl?

    Do you teach your child that he will be persecuted
    for his beliefs? Is that healthy for your child?
    6
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE

    Is your child frightened by the prospect of
    persecution?
    Satan:
    Many do not consider Satan to be a real person and
    will find your belief in Satan to be childish or fanatical .
    When giving an answer, distinguish the Bible's view of
    Satan from the cartoon character with a pitchfork, as
    many people view Satan . If people believe in God and
    His angels, why is it childish to believe that some angels
    chose to disobey God?

    Is Satan the ruler of the world?

    Does Satan control everyone who is not one of
    Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Is Satan powerful?

    Are you afraid of Satan?

    Do you teach your child about Satan? Is your child
    afraid of Satan?
    Armageddon:
    Armageddon marks a time of destruction of the
    wicked, as well as the beginning of Jehovah's righteous
    new system. Emphasize the positive aspects of the event .
    It is not like the frightening hellfire doctrine, which
    keeps the wicked in torment forever .
    • Do you believe that we are living in the time of the
    end? Do you believe that many people and much of
    the world will be destroyed at Armageddon?

    Will that be a frightening time?

    Do you teach your child about Armageddon?

    Is your child not scared, "upset at the prospect of his
    mother/father, school friends, neighbors and
    himself/herself being destroyed at Armageddon?
    Practices of Jehovah's Witnesses :

    How many meetings do Jehovah's Witnesses have a
    week?
    7
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE

    Do you attend all of these meetings?

    If you did not attend all of these meetings or go out
    preaching, would you be subject to congregational
    disapproval or discipline by your elders?

    Do you bring your child to all of these meetings?

    Is it not correct that if your child attends your
    mid-week meeting he would not be in bed before
    9 :45 or 10 :00 p.m.? Is that not a very late night for
    a small child?

    Isn't it, difficult for a small child to sit through these
    long meetings? Wouldn't your child rather be
    playing than attending these church meetings?

    Would you teach your child to be one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses?

    Do you hope your child will become one of
    Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Will you bring your child to all of your meetings?

    Will you bring your child out in your preaching
    work? Every weekend? For how long?

    If your child did not want to go to your church
    meetings, would you force him to go?

    If your child did not want to go out preaching,
    would you force him to go?
    • Is it not difficult for you to go preaching at times?
    Do you meet some people who do not want to hear
    your message, who reject you and are rude to you?

    If your child went preaching he at times would
    encounter people who disagree with him, reject him
    and are rude to him?

    Wouldn't that be difficult for your child? Would he
    find that hard to endure?

    Is it not harmful for children to feel rejected?

    If you care about your child, why would you
    deliberately place him in a situation where he is
    bound to suffer embarrassment and rejection?
    8
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE
    School: (May be faced with quotes from
    "School" Brochure)
    Many feel that Jehovah's Witnesses are against education.
    On the contrary, the children of Jehovah's Witnesses
    are encouraged to make the most of their education
    and to become proficient in reading, writing, and
    analytical abilities . In fact, Jehovah's Witnesses often excel
    in school . You may use the Index to investigate the
    wide range of topics on which the Society encourages
    discussion and research . The Society's publications encourage
    our youths to be diligent and serious-minded in
    their studies.

    This booklet "School and Jehovah's Witnesses" sets
    out your church's beliefs in the school setting? Your
    church recommends that parents and children in
    your faith are to follow the rules set out in this
    booklet and that teachers should abide by them?

    Isn't it true that you won't permit your child to
    associate with or make close friends of people who
    are not Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Isn't it true that you won't permit your child to go
    to school dances? to date?

    Isn't it true that you would not allow your children
    to participate in extracurricular activities? school
    plays? school bands?

    Isn't it true that you would not permit your child to
    be a class representative or be on the school
    council?

    Isn't it true that you would not permit your child to
    participate in school elections?

    Isn't it true that you would not allow your child to
    join any school clubs?

    Isn't it true that you would not allow your child to
    join any school teams?

    Isn't it true you would not permit your child to
    engage in any school activities associated with
    national or religious holidays?

    You do not permit your child to stand up for the
    National Anthem in school?
    9
    CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS THAT WITNESS PARENT COULD FACE

    Your children will be very different from the
    majority of children in school and will be deprived
    of many enjoyable, healthy activities that other
    students enjoy?

    At times your child may be mocked or alienated at
    school because of these beliefs?

    It's not easy for a child to be one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses at school?

    If you love your child why would you want to
    deprive him,'her of so many activities that he/she
    would enjoy?

    Isn't it true that you would not permit your child to
    attend a college or university?

    Isn't it true that if your child attended a college or
    university he/she would face disapproval in
    congregation and be subject to counseling by your
    ministers?

    Would you support your child if he/she decided to
    go to a college or university?

    Isn't it true that you want and are going to teach
    your child to be a full-time minister?

    That. is the only career that you intend for your
    child?
    Corporal punishment:

    As one of Jehovah's Witnesses you believe in
    corporal punishment?

    You believe the Bible directs parents to discipline
    their children with a rod or stick?

    You would not he a good Christian/ good parent if
    you failed to heed that Biblical command?
    Practice sessions :

    Did you talk to your lawyer about this court
    proceeding?

    Did your lawyer tell you what to say?
    10
    SAMPLE APPROACH BY
    WITNESS PARENT
    TO CROSS-EXAMINATION
    11
    SAMPLE APPROACH BY WITNESS PARENT TO CROSS-EXAMINATION
    Do you believe you have the only right religion?
    Of course I do . If I didn't think so I would join
    another.
    Do you believe the Catholic (or other) Church is true or
    false?
    I believe its teachings are in error .
    Will all Catholics (or others) he destroyed?
    Jehovah makes those judgments, not we .
    Do Jehovah's Witnesses celebrate Christmas?
    The celebration of the winter solstice on
    December 25 goes back to the ancient Roman
    practices of the Saturnalia . It is part of pagan sun
    worship. We do not celebrate pagan festivals . The
    Bible directs that we celebrate Jesus' death, not
    birth.
    Are not your children deprived of the Christmas spirit?
    Jehovah's Witnesses encourage love, familial
    association and charity throughout the year .
    Gift-giving and family association are not restricted
    to one day or time of year .
    Do you respect other religions? If so, why do you go
    from house to house trying to convert people?
    The Bible has good news for people of all religions
    and backgrounds--the good news that God will
    soon bring peace to earth through his Kingdom .
    We want to share this with our neighbors .
    12
    SAMPLE APPROACH BY WITNESS PARENT TO CROSS-EXAMINATION
    Do you teach that it is better to die than take a blood
    transfusion?
    I do not want myself or my children to die. I want
    the best medical treatment I can get for my child .
    Blood transfusions carry many death-dealing side
    effects such as AIDS. We prefer to accept safer
    medical alternatives .
    How do you know there are alternatives?
    Our church regularly reproduces medical
    information that points out alternatives . Besides, I
    have discussed this with my doctor who is willing
    to use the alternatives.
    What if a doctor said there are no alternatives?
    That is only one opinion . Jehovah's Witnesses know
    from experience that there are many different
    medical opinions . Also we know of many cases
    where the same thing was said but the patient still
    recovered without blood transfusion . Jehovah's
    Witnesses are being treated successfully without
    blood by doctors and hospitals throughout North
    America.
    13
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION
    QUESTIONS FOR
    NON-WITNESS PARENT
    14
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT
    Work:

    Where do you work?

    How far is your work place from your home?

    What time do you leave for work?

    What are your hours of work?

    What times would the child require day-care
    assistance of a neighbor? friend? relative?

    Is your spouse home at those same times?

    Is a neighbor/friend/relative to be preferred over the
    child's mother/father for day-care?
    Jehovah's Witnesses' role as parents
    and spouse . . .
    A) Parent:

    Does your spouse prepare meals for the family?

    Does your spouse do family laundry?

    Does your spouse care well for the home? (i .e.,
    provide a neat home, do maintenance, etc .)

    Does your spouse care well for the children?

    Does your spouse wake the children in the
    morning?

    Does your spouse dress the children in the morning?

    Does your spouse prepare breakfast for the
    children?
    • Does your spouse prepare lunch for the children?
    • Does your spouse prepare supper for the children?

    Does your spouse take the children to school?

    Does your spouse take care of the children when
    they are sick?

    Is your spouse at home when the children return
    from school?
    15
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT

    Does your spouse put the children to bed?

    Does your spouse take an interest in the children's
    education?

    Does your spouse spend time helping the children
    with their education/homework in school?

    Does your spouse visit the schoolteachers?

    Does your spouse attend the school on
    parent/teacher night?

    Do you attend the school on parent/teacher nights?

    When was the last time you attended the school on
    parent/teacher night?

    Does your spouse engage in recreation with your
    children? Which? When?

    Do your children love your spouse?

    Does your spouse love your children?
    • Wouldn't you agree that your children need both
    their mother and their father?

    Is your spouse a good parent?

    Would you describe your spouse as a good
    man, woman?

    Describe your spouse's good qualities .
    if non-Witness alleges Witness spouse has
    made church more important than family:
    • How has your spouse put his/her church ahead of
    family? Give examples.

    What you really mean is she will not let you dictate
    what church she goes to?
    B) Spouse:

    How did spouse's conversion to Jehovah's Witnesses
    harm his/her sexual relationship with you?

    Did your spouse refuse the marital due?
    16
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT

    Have you been very upset since your spouse has
    become one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Might your angry attitude have an adverse
    emotional effect on your spouse?

    Is it surprising your spouse would find it difficult in
    view of your attitude of intolerance and animosity?

    Is your spouse hospitable?

    Does your spouse entertain your friends and family?

    Isn't it true that your spouse is friendly and has
    good relationships with your family members?

    Did your spouse suggest family counseling?

    Wasn't he/she willing to attend family counseling?

    Why did you reject family counseling?
    • Is it not correct that your children become upset
    when they observe angry interchanges between
    their parents?

    Is it not true that your children are disturbed and
    upset by your separation from your spouse?
    Corporal punishment:

    Do you discipline your children?

    Do you ever spank your children?
    Holidays:

    How has your spouse actively discouraged children
    from sharing in Christmas, etc ., with yourself?

    Has your spouse prevented you from having your
    friends into the home?

    Has your spouse ever invited people into the home
    over the Christmas period?

    Has your spouse ever asked you to make a meal
    during this period?
    17
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT

    Does your spouse give gifts to children at
    Christmas?

    Do they accept gifts?

    Does your spouse prevent you from sharing in such
    celebrations with the children?
    Blood:

    What do you know about blood transfusions?

    Have you ever read any medical information about
    blood transfusions?

    Do you know if there are any adverse side effects?

    Have you heard of AIDS and hepatitis being
    contracted through blood transfusions?

    Have you inquired if there are alternatives?

    Can you point to any medical information that
    shows more people recover with blood transfusions
    than any alternative treatment?

    Hove you talked to any doctors who operate without
    blood transfusions?

    Have you discussed the issue of blood transfusions
    with your spouse?

    Did your spouse say that he/she would let the
    children (lie without any medical treatment? What
    were your spouse's exact words?

    Does your spouse bring your children to your family
    doctor on a regular basis?

    Do any of your children have health/medical
    problems at present?

    Do your children at present suffer from any
    conditions requiring blood transfusions?

    Have your children ever needed a blood transfusion?

    Has your spouse ever denied your children any
    medical treatment when they were sick?
    18
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT
    Non-Witness spouse's religious activities

    In what religion were you raised?

    Which religions have you been affiliated
    with/attended during your life?

    Do you practice any religion? Which religion?
    Where?

    When was the last church service attended?

    How often have you attended services in last six
    months? Year? Five years?

    Has your spouse ever tried to prevent you from
    going to your own church?

    Does your spouse interfere with your taking the
    children to a church of your choice?

    Do you bring your children with you when you
    attend church?

    Does your family attend church on a regular basis
    as a family unit? Which church? How often?

    Which churches have you taken children to? When?
    Where? When was the last time?

    Describe your activities within your church .

    Do your children attend Sunday School at your
    church? When?

    Over what period of time have they attended
    Sunday School?

    Do you believe in the Bible?

    Is the Bible a Holy Book to your church?

    Does your priest (minister) read from the Bible?

    Do you read the Bible? Do you study the Bible?
    How often?

    Do you have any objection to your spouse
    reading/studying the Bible? (If so, what and why?)

    Do you have any objection to your children
    reading/studying the Bible? (If so, what and why?)
    19
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT

    Do you pray with your children at home? When?
    How often?

    Do You pray with your children at mealtimes?
    Bedtime?

    Do you believe in Hell?

    Does your church teach your children to believe in
    Hell?

    What form of birth control do you practice?

    Is this a form of birth control that is
    accepted/approved by your church?
    Status of children:

    What are the ages of your children?

    What are the hobbies, interests, aptitudes, etc ., of
    your children? (Note : Ask about the children
    individually ; often a rigid parent will not know his
    individual children well .)

    Where do your children attend school?

    What grades are they in?

    Are your children doing well in school? What are
    their marks? (Note : See if parent can describe how
    each child is doing individually .)

    What do the report cards show? (Note : Seek order
    compelling discovery of the children's report cards .)

    Do the teachers find their progress acceptable?

    Have you seen the children during classes?

    Do your children have friends?

    Do your children have friends at school? Have you
    inquired?

    So you consider your children to be normal
    children?

    Are you proud of your children?
    20
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT
    Religious activities of Witness spouse :

    Is your spouse free to choose a religion for
    himself/herself?

    Do you object to him/her going to church?

    If your spouse were to attend services at a Jewish
    Synagogue or Mormon Tabernacle, would that be
    objectionable to you? If not, why not? (Note :
    Repeat above question for Christian Science Church,
    Mennonite or Amish Church .)

    Would you permit your children to attend these
    services with your spouse?

    Do you object to your spouse attending meetings at
    the Kingdom Hall? Why?

    Do you object to your spouse bringing your children
    to the Kingdom Hall? Why?

    When does your spouse attend church meetings?

    What are the hours?

    Please tell me what hours your spouse spends in
    church work. (Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, etc .)

    Is this at the same time that the children are in
    school?

    How has your spouse forced the children into her
    religion? Give examples .
    If non-Witness spouse alleges that beliefs
    of Jehovah's Witness spouse will
    harm children :

    What religious beliefs of your spouse will damage
    children? (Provide list and examples .)

    What religious practices of your spouse will damage
    children? (Provide list and examples .)

    What has been your spouse's "indoctrination of the
    children"?

    What examples can you point to?

    Is reading the Bible indoctrination?
    21
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT

    How have your children been "disrupted,"
    "confused," "emotionally disturbed," "upset," etc ., by
    your spouse's religious beliefs/practices? (Give
    examples.)

    Where is this "confusion," "anxiety" reflected in your
    children's school reports?

    What do the teachers say?

    Do the children have a problem with your spouse's
    faith or do you?

    Do the children love your spouse? Do they enjoy
    being with your spouse?

    Is this evidence of children who are "worried and
    anxious"?
    Non-Witness spouse's attitude to Witness
    spouse:

    Has your spouse ever tried to stop you from going to
    your own church?

    Does your spouse allow you to take the children to
    the church of your choice?

    Have you ever attended a meeting of Jehovah's
    Witnesses to hear what is taught?

    Have you ever read publications of Jehovah's
    Witnesses? What have you read? (Note : If
    affirmative answer given, ask name, page, and date
    of publication .)

    Have you talked to any ministers of Jehovah's
    Witnesses to ask them questions?

    Have you associated with Jehovah's Witnesses on a
    social basis?

    Do they have parties? Do they enjoy other
    recreation? What inquiries have you made?
    • Are "birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, and New
    Year's" the only enjoyable activities there are in
    your life?

    Does your spouse, as one of Jehovah's Witnesses,
    22
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT
    teach your children honesty? To tell the truth?
    Respect others' property?

    How do you know Jehovah's Witnesses "do not
    recognize the government of the United States"?
    Why were you told this? (Note : Or any other
    allegations raised by non-Witness spouse .)

    What do they not recognize?

    Do they pay taxes? Do they obey the laws?

    Do they encourage honesty and good citizenship?

    What has been your response when your spouse
    talks to you about religion?
    Note: Fit the following questions to the facts
    of individual case:

    Have you not admitted to being frustrated?

    Did you not on one occasion rip up a book?

    Is it surprising that a wife/husband would not want
    to talk to her/his husband/wife about such matters
    when reaction is always one of anger? (Note : If
    non-Witness spouse has used words such as
    "fanatic," "proselytizing," "religious intransigence,"
    "obsessed," "indoctrination," ask him/her to define
    these words as he/she understands them . These may
    be his/her lawyer's words and not his own .)

    Do you respect the government of the United
    States?

    Do you respect the Constitution of the United
    States?

    Do you respect the constitutional provision that
    guarantees your spouse's freedom of worship?

    Are you so intolerant that the minute your spouse
    wants to practice the religion of his/her choice, you
    want to break up the family?

    Is that how you demonstrate your respect for the
    Constitution of the United States? The Bill of
    Rights? The government of the United States?
    23
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT

    Is your spouse's religion the problem, or is it your
    intolerant attitude?
    If non-Witness spouse alleges Witness spouse
    made an agreement as to the religion of the
    children :

    What is the agreement you are referring to?
    • When did your spouse agree that he/she would not
    involve your children in the teachings of Jehovah's
    Witnesses (or raise them as Catholics, etc.)?

    Where is the agreement?

    When was it signed? (Note : Seek an order to compel
    discovery of agreement .)
    Child's freedom of choice :

    Do you object to your child being exposed to
    different viewpoints? Religious viewpoints?

    Do you object to the school teaching children about
    different nations/cultures and their religions?

    Do you object to your children learning about the
    religious viewpoints of their friends and their
    friends' families?

    Do you want to prevent your children from learning
    about their other parent's views?

    Does your spouse prevent the children from
    knowing about your religious views?

    Why do you want to stop the children from learning
    about his/hers?

    Should your children be allowed to choose which
    religion they wish to follow?

    Flow can a child be allowed to choose his/her own
    religious persuasion unless he/she is exposed to
    his/her parents' religious choices?

    Do you love your children only so long as they are
    in your religion?
    24
    SAMPLE CROSS-EXAMINATION QUESTIONS FOR NON-WITNESS PARENT
    • Will you still love your children if they become
    Catholics, Jews, members of the United Church,
    Mormons, or Jehovah's Witnesses?

    What have you told your children about Jehovah's
    Witnesses?
    25
    SAMPLE DIRECT EXAMINATION
    AND SAMPLE RESPONSES
    FOR LOCAL ELDER
    26
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER

    What is your name? What is your occupation?
    Where do you live?

    What sort of instruction does the church encourage
    parents to provide their children?
    (For example, you might wish to share some of
    the following educational and
    culturally-enriching subjects from the Society's
    publications :
    Arts and Crafts
    "You, Too, Can Learn Calligraphy!" Awake!,
    August 8, 1985, p. 25-27
    "Oil Painting-Wholesome Relaxation," Awake!,
    May 8, 1974, p . 21-23
    "A Closer Look at Famous Works of Art,"
    Awake!, January 8, 1982, p . 16-20
    "Keeping Small Hands Busy," Awake!, May 8,
    1985, p. 24-27
    "Are We Losing the Art of Learning?" Awake!,
    September 22, 1982, p . 22, 23
    Hobbies and Recreation
    "Choosing a Hobby Wisely," Awake!,
    November 8, 1961, p . 13-16
    "Beauty in the Rocks," Awake!, September 22,
    1969, p. 20-22
    "The Value of Toys," Awake!, January 8, 1971,
    p. 9-12
    "Stamp Collecting as a Hobby," Awake!, July 8,
    1971, p. 20-23
    "Is Home Sewing for You?" Awake!, August 22,
    1973, p. 9-12
    "Knitting as a Lifetime Hobby," Awake!, May 8,
    1978, p. 23-26
    "The Origin of Playing Cards," Awake!,
    August 22, 1978, p . 9-12
    27
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER
    "Home Computers-Are They for You?"
    Awake!, February 8, 1984, p. 12-15
    "Cooking Spaghetti Giulia's Way," Awake!,
    January 8, 1986, p. 25-27
    "Cheese-Are You a Connoisseur?" Awake!,
    August 8, 1986, p . 25-27
    "Will the Abacus Survive Again?" Awake!,
    December 8, 1986, p . 19
    "Young People Ask . . . What About After-School
    Activities?" Ibid., p. 16-18
    "Exploring Earth's Last Great Frontier,"
    Awake!, December 22, 1986, p . 16-19
    Music and. Entertainment
    "What Should Your Child Read?" Awake!,
    March 22, 1978, p . 16-21
    "Can Television Benefit Us?" Awake!, April 22,
    1978, p. 4-6
    "Control Your Television!" Ibid., p. 17-20
    "What Do You Do for Entertainment?" Awake!,
    January 22, 1979, p . 3, 4
    "Don't Ignore the Need for Entertainment,"
    Ibid., p. 5-8
    "Playing Indoor Games," Ibid., p. 9-12
    "Understanding and Enjoying Music," Awake!,
    February 8, 1979, p . 20-24
    "Music Lessons for Your Two-Year-Old?"
    Awake!, February 22, 1980, p . 25-28
    "A Sense of Humor-God's Gift," Awake!,
    September 8, 1980, p . 25-28
    "Begin Teaching Your Baby to Read," Awake!,
    September 22, 1982, p . 23-27
    "What Is Your Kind of Music?" The Watchtower,
    January 15, 1983, p . 3, 4
    28
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER
    "Bridge That Gap With Conversation," Awake!,
    June 8, 1983, p. 24, 25
    "They Are Helping Children to Read," Awake!,
    June 22, 1985, p . 23
    "Reading--It Can Enrich Your Life," Awake!,
    September 8, 1985, p . 3-8
    "Young People Ask . . . How Can I Have a Good
    Time?" Awake!, November 8, 1986, p . 10-12
    Sports
    "Winter Can Be Fun," Awake!, December 22,
    1958, p. 8-11
    "Flying a Kite Can Be Fun," Awake!, March 22,
    1973, p. 24-26
    "How Long Could You Survive in Deep Water?"
    Awake!, June 22, 1973, p . 17-19
    "Discovering the Wonderful World of Walking,"
    Awake!, August 22, 1973, p . 24-27
    "You Can Sail Safely," Awake!, September 8,
    1980, p. 23-25
    "My First Marathon," Awake!, December 22,
    1980, p. 27, 28
    "Lessons You Can Learn from Sports," Awake!,
    July 22, 1981, p . 25-27
    "Sports and the Fancily-A Balanced View,"
    Awake!, May 22, 1982, p. 9-11
    "Surfing-What's It All About?" Awake!, August
    22, 1982, p . 12-16
    "Young People Ask . . . Should I Go In for
    Bodybuilding?" Awake!, December 22, 1986,
    p. 13-15)
    (Other general topics include Animals and Plant
    Life, Economics and Employment, Health,
    Human Relations, Lands and Peoples, Science,
    World Affairs, and many more .)
    29
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER

    How does the church assist parents?
    (For example, you might consider Bible Story
    book and illustrate how the book is organized
    and how it teaches principles such as honesty,
    respect for authority, the value of obedience,
    etc.)

    is this publication used only by Jehovah's
    Witnesses?

    Is this the only type of publication the church
    provides?
    (You may -want to refer to and give brief resume
    of Great Teacher and Youth books and "Young
    People Ask" series and discuss in similar fashion
    as Bible Story book resume.)

    Flow important. do Jehovah's Witnesses consider
    such parental instruction of children?
    (Referring to scriptures such as 1 Timothy 5 :8,
    Ephesians 6 :1-4, and Proverbs 1 :8, 9, you may
    want to give Bible examples of parental
    instruction which benefited offspring to
    emphasize this fundamental Bible belief . Also
    see "Rearing Happy Children in a Troubled
    World," The Watchtower, January 15, 1982,
    p. 12 . )

    Can you describe what takes place at the meetings
    of Jehovah's Witnesses?
    (Many criticize the meeting schedule as one
    which is overly demanding for a young child .
    You may want to highlight that they are
    religious, educational, promote a warm familial
    spirit, and that young people make many social
    contacts at these meetings .)

    Why do Jehovah's Witnesses visit people in their
    homes by calling from house to house?
    30
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER
    (Highlight that visits are made with interested
    people to share good news of bright future for
    all mankind . Also see Kingdom Ministry,
    December 1977, "Are You Instructing Your
    Family?" and Kingdom Ministry, February 1979,
    "How Does God's Kingdom Affect Your
    Family?")

    Can you describe what takes place at such visits?
    (There are various positive features to highlight .
    For example, many people invite Jehovah's
    Witnesses in and engage in upbuilding
    conversations ; people who are not interested are
    left on a friendly basis ; many visits are made on
    people who are also social contacts and
    conversation is not restricted to religious beliefs ;
    many home visits are like dropping in to see
    friends ; children who accompany parent learn to
    be outgoing and take an active interest in people
    from various backgrounds .)

    What view does your church encourage children to
    take toward a parent who is not one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses?
    (Ephesians 6 :1 is to be applied to one who is not
    one of Jehovah's Witnesses, as well as to a
    parent who is disfellowshipped . See w10/15/81,
    p. 19 ; g10/22/75, p . 27, 28 ; g9/22/70, p . 27, 28 .)

    What view does church take toward people of other
    religions?
    (Jesus taught love neighbor as self, includes all ;
    we respect others' right to worship as they
    choose.)

    Does church teach that young people should learn
    only about religion of Jehovah's Witnesses?
    (No. Consider following objective consideration
    of other religions in our publications :
    31
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER
    Young People Ask . . . Why Should I Accept
    My Parents' Religion?,
    Awake!, November 22, 1986, p . 13-15 ;
    Young People Ask . . . Is the Bible Relevant
    for Me?,
    Awake!, May 22, 1986, p . 12-14 ;
    A Non-Violent World-Did Ghandi Show the
    Way?,
    Awake!, April 8, 1984, p . 3-12 ;
    What Is Religion Doing for Mankind?,
    Awake!, January 8, 1984, p. 3-14 ;
    The Latter-Day Saints in Today's World,
    Awake!, December 22, 1982, p . 24-27 ;
    Moon's Unification Church-What Does It
    Believe?,
    Awake!, September 8, 1982, p. 10-15;
    The Church of England-An "Endangered
    Species"?,
    Awake!, July 8, 1981, p . 25-27;
    Why So Many Religions in South Africa?,
    Awake!, January 22, 1981, p . 12-1.5 ;
    A Look at Hindu Views of Life and Death,
    Awake!, February 8, 1977, p . 16-23 ;
    Is Buddhism the Way to Enlightenment?,
    Awake!, January 8, 1974, p. 16-19;
    Test Your Religious Knowledge,
    Awake!, April 22, 1961, p. 4-27 ;
    32
    DIRECT EXAMINATION AND SAMPLE RESPONSES FOR LOCAL ELDER
    Examining Islamic Teachings,
    Watchtower, November 1, 1953,
    p. 653-656 .

    Are there substantial differences between basic
    principles of morality as taught by Jehovah's
    Witnesses and the Catholic (or whichever) Church?
    (Principles of Ten Commandments are common
    to both groups .)
    33
    SAMPLE RESUME OF BIBLE STORY BOOK
    34
    RESUME OF BIBLE STORY BOOK
    This book is designed for young children . (See blue
    block on publisher's page of Bible Story book.) This book
    would be the basis for any religious communication
    between the parent and the child, up to about age seven
    or eight.
    The teachings are positive as will be shown by
    analysis. No serious-minded parent could object,
    regardless of particular religious association . The lessons
    are objective .
    The lessons in this book are NOT doctrinal . They are
    lessons on loyalty, honesty, morality, human
    relationships, and self-discipline .
    If, for example, the mother is a serious Catholic,
    there is no real conflict between what the father would
    communicate to the child and what the mother would
    teach.
    Following is a list of chapters that might be referred
    to and the lesson in each :
    INTRODUCTION: The book is a lesson in
    chronological Bible history .
    CHAPTER 2:
    "A Beautiful Garden"
    Used to introduce very young child
    to the animal kingdom and to
    teach basic lessons in biology . Note
    that, all the animals in the picture
    are in pairs, and they have babies .
    Allows introduction of such basic
    subjects as reproduction.
    CHAPTER 5:
    "A Hard Life Begins"
    Child can be introduced to the
    value of respect and obedience to
    authority, whether parental or
    community, e .g. police and courts .
    35
    RESUME OF BIBLE STORY BOOK
    CHAPTER 19:
    "Jacob Has a Big Family"
    Child is introduced to the concept
    that producing a family is an
    honor and a privilege . Emphasizes
    unselfishness exhibited in
    production of a large family .
    Families contribute to growth of
    community and nation.
    CHAPTER 20:
    "Dinah Gets Into Trouble"
    Introduces child to the dangers of
    associating with immoral and
    dishonest persons . Teaches
    morality at an early age without
    specifics. Aversion to sexual abuse
    of women and discrimination.
    CHAPTER 37:
    "A Tent for Worship"
    This chapter shows that child is
    taught respect for a house of
    worship and all the equipment and
    material used in the house of
    worship. Child is taught respect for
    altar and priests .
    CHAPTER 44:
    "Rahab Hides the Spies"
    Child learns that we do not refuse
    to help people or show kindness to
    people even though we do not
    approve of what they do. Rahab
    was a prostitute.
    CHAPTER 51:
    "Ruth and Naomi"
    No better lesson in family loyalty
    and teaching child value of respect
    for older persons and responsibility
    to help senior citizens .
    36
    OF BIBLE STORY BOOK
    CHAPTER 55:
    "A Little Boy Serves God"
    Very young children can learn
    respect for religious service,
    respect for God, and for legitimate
    priesthood. (Use the picture .)
    CHAPTER 63:
    "Wise King Solomon"
    (Use the picture .) What an
    illustration of the value of judicial
    wisdom and family love . Builds
    respect for modern-day judiciary.
    The mother would rather give up
    the child than have him injured.
    In terms that a very young child
    can understand . Also shows that
    wisdom is better than materialism .
    CHAPTER 71 :
    "God Promises a Paradise"
    This is what the child is being
    taught to look forward to . Is it
    bad? Gives hope and optimistic
    future in a world where many turn
    to suicide .
    CHAPTER 75:
    "Four Boys in Babylon"
    Teenagers do not have to give in
    to pressure from their peers . The
    old virtues and basics are worth
    standing up for.
    CHAPTER 77:
    "They Would Not Bow Down"
    (Sequel to chapter 75.) Children
    learn that there is a time in life to
    be firm for right principles .
    CHAPTER 84:
    "An Angel Visits Mary"
    37
    RESUME OF BIBLE STORY BOOK
    CHAPTER 85:
    "Jesus Born in a Stable"
    Child is taught respect for the
    circumstances of Jesus' birth . (Use
    the picture .) Child learns the real
    value of the birth and life of Jesus
    without influence from
    commercialism. Who can object?
    CHAPTER 86:
    "Men Guided by a Star"
    Same points. (Use the picture.)
    ChAPTER 94 :
    "He Loves Little Children"
    Jesus used children to teach
    lessons of flexibility, humility, and
    respect. Children can understand
    this better than adults .
    CHAPTER 95:
    "The Way Jesus Teaches"
    Who can object to a child learning
    the story of the Good Samaritan?
    It is universally respected. We
    even have "Good Samaritan"
    hospitals in some locations. Child
    learns history and background of a
    very common expression as well as
    the lesson in human responsibility
    that is taught . Learns racial
    discrimination to be shunned .
    CHAPTER 99:
    "In an Upstairs Room"
    Jesus introduced the Last Supper .
    Respected by most religions,
    including Catholicism. Why
    shouldn't a child learn the history
    of its origin?
    CHAPTER 110:
    "Timothy-Paul's New Helper"
    The ministry is a respected and
    honorable profession .
    38
    RESUME OF BIBLE STORY BOOK
    CHAPTER 115:
    "A New Paradise on Earth"
    (Use the picture.) This is what the
    child is taught to look forward to .
    39
    SAMPLE DIRECT EXAMINATION AND
    SAMPLE RESPONSES
    FOR YOUNG WITNESSES
    40
    DIRECT EXAMINATION & RESPONSES FOR YOUNG WITNESSES

    What is your name?

    How old are you?

    Where do you live?

    Are you one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    When did you become one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    Do you have any brothers or sisters?

    Are they Jehovah's Witnesses?

    How is your relationship with them?

    Tell us something about your father and mother :
    Are they Jehovah's Witnesses?
    If not, what religion?
    What are their occupations?
    If Married:•
    Is your husband/wife one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses?

    Are his/her parents Jehovah's Witnesses?

    What are their occupations?

    What is your relationship with them?

    How is your relationship with your
    parents?

    I-low old were you when your mother/father became
    one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

    have you therefore been exposed to different
    religious views?

    Can you tell us how this has affected you?
    (helped to understand other views ; be
    tolerant; appreciate divergence of opinions ;
    respect for other religions ; listen to other
    people's comments ; in general to be a more
    fulfilled and balanced person, etc .)
    41
    DIRECT EXAMINATION & RESPONSES FOR YOUNG WITNESSES

    Did you find that this difference of religion was
    confusing to you?

    Did it cause you any problems?

    flow has your association with Jehovah's Witnesses
    affected your life?

    Did it help you avoid any problems?
    (Comment regarding positive ways association
    with Jehovah's Witnesses has helped ; to have
    a purpose in life ; to help other people ; to be
    good Citizens ; good morals ; be selective as to
    conduct, company, etc .)

    What do you do for recreation?

    What about social activities?

    What about family activities?

    How did you do in school?

    Did you have any problems?

    Did you get along with other students?

    The fact that you are one of Jehovah's Witnesses, do
    you feel that hindered your situation?

    What are your plans for the future?
    42
    DIRECT EXAMINATION & RESPONSES FOR YOUNG WITNESSES
    EVIDENCE OF YOUNG PEOPLE :
    This can be used to show that they are normal .
    Identify and interview young people from local
    congregations who have been raised as Jehovah's
    Witnesses and, in the eyes of the presiding overseer, are
    spiritually minded but also enjoy the normal healthy
    things that young people do . They don't have to be
    competitive to enjoy sports . Be careful that they don't
    get the impression that they are in a demonstration at
    the circuit assembly, when they would show that the
    first things in life are service and going to the Kingdom
    Hall . Show hobbies, crafts, social activity, sports, and
    especially plans for the future . Be careful they don't all
    say that they are going to be pioneers . Plans can be
    trade, getting married and having children, journalism,
    and all kinds of other things . Maybe you can show an
    interest in art and the theater . They must be clean,
    moral, honest, but with the interests that you would
    expect from other young people .
    Ho 'c you been exposed to different religious views since
    youth? How has this affected you
    Learned to be tolerant and appreciate divergence
    of opinions ; while personally choosing teachings of
    Jehovah's Witnesses, have learned to respect
    others' right of choice .
    How has your association with Jehovah's Witnesses
    affected your life?
    Comment on positive value of truth ; have a
    purpose in life ; take interest in other people ; good
    morals; obey the law, etc .
    Do your go from house-to-house? Describe your reaction .
    ;E dluceartin ohnaolw tvaolue of social contact
    meet people, strike up a conversation and reason
    on a variety of topics . At an early date learned
    43
    DIRECT EXAMINATION & RESPONSES FOR YOUNG WITNESSES
    about the many different views people have .
    Meeting people at doors overcame shyness and lack
    of confidence . Ease of dealing with people is
    valuable now in business as well as religious and
    social activities .
    Is it not depressing when you are rejected at a door?
    No . We have something good to share with those
    who want to listen . Each individual has the right
    to his opinion . If rejected, we can leave and find
    someone who does want to talk a few doors away .
    Are not three religious meetings a week boring?
    No. Meetings are interesting . Participate in
    Theocratic Ministry School and learn how to talk
    to people . Associate with other young people at
    meetings . Make social and recreational
    arrangements.
    What do you do for recreation, social activities, family
    activities?
    Describe a balanced range of activity.
    How (lid you do in school? Did you have any problems?
    Did yon get along with other students? Did your
    association with Jehovah's Witnesses hinder your
    education?
    Not at all ; kept me out of trouble with the drug
    scene, immorality, illegitimate children, shoplifting,
    etc . Helped me take a mature view of the need for
    an education so I could do something useful and
    interesting with my life.
    44
    LIST OF SOURCE MATERIAL
    Professional Studies in
    Child Psychology
    45
    PROFESSIONAL STUDIES IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
    1 . Freud, Child Observations and Prediction of
    Development, 13 Psychoanalytic Study of the Child 92,
    97, 98 (1958) (emphasis added) :
    It was Ernst Kris himself who drew our attention
    to the hopelessness of such clinical .foresight in
    what lie had described as the first phase of
    psychoanalytic child psychology . While we knew
    no store of the predestined sequences of
    development than the libidinal phases and "some
    crucial conflicts and typical danger situations
    related to the maturational sequence" (p.27),
    prediction, was not possible . There were too
    many unknown factors which determined the
    out conic of the child's reactions to his
    experiences and their genetic, economic, and
    dynamic interrelations.... There remain a
    number of factors which make clinical foresight,
    i .e., prediction, difficult and hazardous. 1 name
    three of then here . (1) There is no guarantee
    that the rate of maturational progress on the side
    of ego development and drive development will
    he an even one; and whenever one side of the
    structure outdistances the other in growth, a
    variety of unexpected and unpredictable
    deviations from the norm will follow . (2) There is
    still no way to approach the quantitative factor
    in drive development, nor to foresee it ; but most
    of the conflict . solutions within the personality
    will, in the last resort, be determined by
    quantitative rather than by qualitative factors .
    (3) The environmental happenings in a child's
    life will always remain unpredictable since they
    are not governed by any known laws .
    2 . Thomas & Chess, Genesis and Evolution of Behavioral
    Disorders: Front Infancy to Early Adult Life, 141 Am. J.
    Psychiatry 9 (1984) :
    As we grow frown childhood to maturity, all
    of us have to shed many childhood illusions . As
    the field of developmental studies has matured,
    46
    PROFESSIONAL STUDIES IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
    we now have to give up the illusion that once we
    know the young child's psychological history,
    subsequent personality and functioning is ipso
    facto predictable .
    3. .T. Ziskin, Coping with Psychiatric and Psychological
    Testimony, 104, 105 (2d ed. Supp. 1977) (emphasis
    added) :
    The picture concerning reliability and validity of
    psychiatric and psychological evaluations
    remains grim, even in regard to clinical usages,
    let alone the more rigorous requirements for use
    in evidence. The current literature reflects
    widespread agreement that reliability and
    validity are unacceptably low .
    4 . 11 . Schaffer, The Growth of Sociability 15-17
    (emphasis added) :
    Parents may be firmly convinced that the
    particular experiences encountered by their baby
    will mark him for good or ill for the rest of his
    life, but when. we turn to scientific support for
    this assertion there is as yet not a single study
    available which firmly and without ambiguity
    demonstrates that a specific experience
    impinging at one particular point of time in
    early human development will leave permanent
    effects on that individual . Birth trauma, breast
    or bottle feeding, type of toilet training,
    swaddling practices-whatever their effects at
    the thee, the lasting imprint of such events has
    not been demonstrated. The aphorism that the
    child is father to the man remains an article of
    faith rather than a scientifically supported
    conclusion .
    What are the forces that come to shape infant
    behaviour? Here we find one of the major issues
    that has divided psychologists in the past into,
    47
    PROFESSIONAL STUDIES IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
    on the one hand, those who see the child as
    essentially an inert blob of clay that must be
    moulded by forces impinging upon him from the
    environment and, on the other hand, those who
    consider the child preformed and look upon
    development as largely an unfolding of inherent
    tendencies. It is easy to assert that heredity and
    environment must both play a part and there are
    .few who would go against such a safe viewpoint .
    Yet in practice, and particularly so in relation to
    early development, we find the divergence of
    opinion a real and often a heated one.
    5. Chess, Developmental Theory Revisited, 26 Can. J.
    Psychiatry 110, 1 .11 (1979) (emphasis added) :
    The accumulation of research data in recent
    years has by now made it clear that our
    "inability to make empirical predictions about
    later personality from the early years" is indeed
    "evidence of a developmental reality ." These
    data have come most dramatically from the
    major longitudinal studies-the type of study
    which is uniquely suited to examine the issue of
    continuity over time. The same message has
    conic from all (5-7, 12), rearming the findings
    of our own longitudinal studies. Similar
    conclusions have come _from the two major
    comprehensive reviews of the recent literature
    by Sameroff (9) and Clarke and Clarke (2).
    Tyre data offer no firm support for the
    popular belief that certain events during the first
    year can produce irreversible consequences in
    either human or infrahuman infants (5).
    6. Ellsworth & Levy, Legislative Reform of Child
    Custody Adjudication, 4 L . Soc'y Rev. 199 (1969) :
    In general, studies show no clear advantage for
    48
    PROFESSIONAL STUDIES IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
    trained judges ; psychologists are not consistently
    better or worse than nonpsychologists (e.g .,
    secretaries, college students, nurses), and clinical
    training and experiences does not improve the
    accuracy of global judgments . If anything,
    clinical training and experience may he
    somewhat detrimental and reduce judgmental
    accuracy, or at least introduce systematic biases
    such as greater emphasis on pathology and less
    favorable prognoses . [Mischel, 1968 : 116 ; see
    also Sarbin et al . 1940].
    7. Dewing & Taft, Some Personality Characteristics of
    the Parents of Creative Twelve-year-olds, 41 J .
    Personality 81, 82 (1973) :
    A second demographic variable found to he
    related to creative ability was unusual religious
    belief . In particular, a disproportionately large
    number of highly creative children were
    Jehovah's Witnesses . Four children from the total
    sample of 394 were members of this sect, and all
    four showed high creative ability . The girl who
    gained the highest total score on the Torrance
    tests, and the girl who was the only child, male
    or female, to be included in the top 20 percent of
    all five performance measures, were both
    Jehovah's Witnesses .
    8 . Sanua, Religion, Mental Health and Personality : A
    Review of Empirical Studies, 125 Am. J. Psychiatry
    1206 (1969) :
    What may be said at this point is that a
    substantial number of additional empirical
    findings would be necessary before any valid
    conclusions could be drawn as to the relationship
    between religiousness and mental health .
    49
    PROFESSIONAL STUDIES IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
    9. Frideres, Offspring of Jewish Intermarriage : A Note,
    35 Jewish Soc. Stud. 156 (1973) :
    The results concerning the remaining dependent
    variables show that little difference is evident
    between children of mixed and homogamous
    marriages. The data relevant to this point does
    not substantiate previous research which
    suggested that children from mixed marriages
    would be more psychologically "unstable" than
    children from homogamous marriages.
    10. Lynch, Mixed Marriages in the Aftermath of
    "Matrimonia Mixta", 11 J. Ecumenical Stud . 653 (1974)
    (emphasis added) :
    Both parents should actively participate in the
    religious upbringing of the children and not view
    the responsibility as one of passive
    "non-interference ." Pedagogically as well as
    pastorally the combined religious influence of
    both parents is most important .
    1.1 . R. Mnookin, Child-Custody Adjudication : Judicial
    Functions in the Face of Indeterminacy, Vol . 39, No. 3,
    1975 :
    While psychiatrists and psychoanalysts have at
    times been enthusiastic in claiming for
    themselves the largest possible role in custody
    proceedings, many have conceded that their
    theories provide no reliable guide for predictions
    about what is likely to happen to a particular
    child. Anna Freud, who has devoted her life to
    the study of the child and who plainly believes
    that theory call be a useful guide to treatment,
    has warned : "In spite of . . . advances there
    remain factors which make clinical foresight, i.e.,
    prediction, difficult and hazardous," not the least
    of which is that "environmental happenings in a
    child's life will always remain unpredictable since
    they are not governed by any known laws ."
    50
    PROFESSIONAL STUDIES IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
    The difficulty of making accurate predictions is
    shown clearly by a study undertaken by Joan
    Macfarlane and her associates in Berkeley,
    California . Using various tests and interviews, the
    Berkeley group, during a thirty-year period,
    studied a group of 166 infants born in 1929 .
    Their objective was to observe the growth
    --emotional, mental, and physical-of normal
    people. As Arlene Skolnick observed, "Over the
    years this study has generated several significant
    research findings, but the most surprising of all
    was the difficulty of predicting what
    thirty-year-old adults would he like even after
    the most sophisticated data had been gathered on
    them as children ."
    51
    52
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL
    OR
    PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    Today the courts rely more and more on the
    evaluations and recommendations of psychologists and
    psychiatrists in determining the best interest of a child .
    The process of psychological or psychiatric evaluation
    may be relevant to the issue of whether the religious
    teachings and beliefs of Jehovah's Witnesses have any
    harmful effect on children . Therefore, there is a growing
    likelihood that both spouses as well as the children will
    receive some type of psychological evaluation, whether
    at the insistence of the court or at the suggestion of an
    attorney in preparing evidence to present the case . The
    objective of this discussion is to help you understand and
    prepare for a psychiatric or psychological evaluation .
    In the past many have feared or distrusted mental
    health care professionals . There is no basis or need for
    such preconceived fear or distrust . Keep in mind that
    the primary objective of the court proceeding and the
    psychological or psychiatric examination is to determine
    which parent is best suited to provide the child a secure
    and safe home. Therefore, certain matters must be kept
    clearly in mind :
    1. Do not be unduly defensive or suspicious of
    the health care professional's role in the
    evaluation process . Many people who work in
    psychology and psychiatry have an interest in people
    and care about people . They give their subjects the
    benefit of the doubt . You should assume that they
    will try to put your best interests first if you
    cooperate with them . Try not to respond in a
    defensive or hostile manner. The mental health care
    professional with whom you are working has a job to
    do . Cooperate with him and he will try to cooperate
    with you .
    2 . Everyone has had problems or difficulties in
    their past and no one comes from a perfect
    background. When questioned about difficult areas
    or problems in the past, be honest and frank . Try to
    show how the truth has helped you to overcome
    psychological scars or problems, but do not
    exaggerate or paint the truth in an unrealistic light,
    claiming that all your problems have gone away
    53
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    since you have learned Bible principles . Show how
    Bible principles are helping you to cope with your
    problems and present them in an honest, objective
    manner.
    3. Do not use the psychiatric session as an
    opportunity to present Bible literature and
    witness about the Kingdom hope . The health care
    professional selected to evaluate you and your family
    has an objective in mind . If court appointed, he is
    required to present his findings to the court and you
    will want to make it . easy for him to do his job . The
    psychologist is probably not interested in the Bible
    principles that guide your life . Rather, lie is
    interested in understanding how you are applying
    Bible principles in your home in order to produce a
    healthy and well-balanced environment in which to
    raise the child . In some circumstances it may be
    appropriate for you to share your hope about God's
    Kingdom during an interview, but you should not
    make it your objective to preach to the mental
    health care professional who conducts the interview .
    1 . Show' that you have a balanced view and that
    the truth has helped you to maintain such a
    view. Do not present yourself or the truth as rigid or
    obsessive . Rather, show the evaluator that you are a
    reasonable person by showing your flexibility and
    responding in an open and nondefensive manner. For
    example, questions about religious practices such as
    not celebrating holidays will be a part of the
    psychological examination . The mental health
    professional will be interested in determining how
    you, as a good parent, handle this practice with your
    child . He will want to know whether or not you are
    sensitive to the fact that your child may feel
    unusual, left out, or alienated by what may be a
    recent change in your religion .
    You will want to take the initiative by showing
    that you have a close and a loving bond with your
    child, that you understand your child's honest
    reactions to your religious practices, that you have
    helped your child to develop a sense of security
    54
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    about the practice of his religion, and that he is not
    merely parroting the expressions that you have
    provided for him . If your child is to be tested, you
    should also try to prepare him or her to face the
    experience with an open and positive attitude .
    5 . If you do not understand a question, ask for
    clarification . If you are asked a question you do not
    understand or if you feel that the interviewer is
    getting at something other than what is stated, you
    should calmly ask the evaluator to restate or
    rephrase the question so that you may provide an
    accurate answer .
    6. You may be asked questions about your
    refusal to take blood or blood products . You may
    be questioned about whether you would permit your
    child to die because of your refusal to consent to a
    blood transfusion . Rather than just explaining your
    hope in your child's resurrection in God's new world
    and deemphasizing the importance of your child's
    life in this system, show a balanced view and state in
    positive terms the medical steps that you would take
    to assure the child had the best possible medical
    treatment available . Be prepared to discuss with the
    evaluator specific alternative medical treatments
    which would be available to the child if some doctor
    was of the opinion that blood was needed . You do
    not want to give the impression that your religion
    requires you to allow your child to die should a
    medical emergency arise .
    7. What is not said is often as important as
    what is said . Remember to maintain good eye
    contact with your evaluator . Sit up straight and try
    to relax as you speak with the evaluator . Act as if
    you were speaking to someone in whom you could
    confide. Use a calm and measured tone of voice . Put
    expression and feeling into your voice so that you
    are able to communicate in an honest and natural
    way. Do not feel intimidated by your evaluator but
    try to put your evaluator at ease .
    55
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    8 . You are on display as one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses . When appearing for the evaluation
    remember to be punctual and to dress in an
    appropriate manner, a manner befitting a minister of
    Jehovah. Since the health care professional is trained
    to do this type of evaluation, to the degree
    reasonable allow him to ask the questions and do not
    try to control or restructure the interview . Not every
    question has a hidden meaning. You do not want to
    present yourself as one who is paranoid or afraid to
    communicate honestly .
    In addition to a conversational, clinical evaluation,
    you may be asked to take certain psychological tests
    which are designed to help the evaluator understand
    your personality and your ability to care for the best
    interests of the child . There are a variety of tests which
    may be used . Some tests focus on your intelligence and
    thinking ability . The Wechsler Intelligence Test appears
    to be a widely administered test . The Wechsler test is a
    series of tests and may be used for adults as well as
    children over the age of four . In addition to testing
    intelligence, this series of tests may also be used to
    measure the examinee's ability to formulate ideas and
    overall intelligence .
    Other types of tests are designed to categorize the
    type of personality. A commonly used test is the
    Rorschach Test. It uses ink blots . The examinee will be
    shown a series of ink blots and will he asked to describe
    what they look like, or what the examinee thinks they
    might be . There are no right or wrong answers .
    However, if you have a defensive or hostile attitude
    about taking the exam, this attitude may influence the
    findings. Your responses will be recorded and scores,
    ratings, and interpretations will he derived therefrom .
    This test is used for adults as well as children of school
    age. Other tests involve use of pictures or diagrams,
    word associations, sentence completion, or expressive
    drawings .
    Often more objective tests and scales are used . For
    example, the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality
    Inventory (MMPI) is widely used to test for certain
    personality traits. It consists of about 550 statements and
    56
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    it calls on the examinee to answer "true," "false" or
    "cannot say ." The topics include family relationships,
    sexual and religious attitudes as well as fears and
    problems within the family . The interpretation of the
    examinee's MMPI score will take into consideration the
    examinee's background, ethnic group, sex, age, and
    education.
    Keep in mind that the objective of a psychological or
    psychiatric evaluation is to determine whether or not
    you are the parent who will provide the better home for
    your child. The mental health professional is interested
    in determining whether or not you have the personality
    and emotional stability to provide for the physical,
    mental, and emotional needs of your child . You must be
    prepared to show in a positive, honest and frank manner
    that you will provide for your child's welfare and best
    interests and that you are the parent more capable of
    doing so . Do not be quick to attack your former spouse .
    Rather, be prepared to show and present in an honest
    way the loving and caring concern you have for your
    child and the way in which you are able to express this
    to the child . Show that you have already developed a
    close, loving relationship with your child and that there
    is nothing in your personality or religious practices that
    would require the child not to be placed in your custody .
    COPING WITH PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    To help you understand how the foregoing general
    principles can be applied, the following examples of
    questions and answers are provided to assist you in a
    psychological or psychiatric evaluation . As indicated, a
    person being evaluated should not be unduly defensive
    or suspicious of the health care professional's role in the
    evaluation process . You would want to answer any
    questions openly, understanding that it is the role of the
    mental health care professional to elicit information
    from you . The following is an example of how NOT to
    respond during the interview :
    Q : Can you tell me about why you and your
    ex-husband divorced?
    57
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    A: Why do you want to know? I know he's
    probably been spreading those lies about me . You're
    probably going to take his side anyway .
    Q : Well, no . But your husband mentioned that
    your religious beliefs have been a source of
    differences . Can you tell me a little bit about your
    religious beliefs?
    A : You know, you psychiatrists don't even
    believe in the Bible. You're always negative against
    someone who practices the Bible. Matthew said we'd
    be persecuted by persons like you . Besides, you
    psychiatrists are more mixed up than anyone . I hear
    you get more divorces and commit suicide more than
    anyone else .
    Q : I don't know if I agree with all that . But I
    would like to know more about your religious beliefs .
    A : Well, I'm glad you asked. I've got my Bible
    here and I'd like to read you these scriptures . Also, I
    brought several articles from The Watchtower, the
    Reasoning book and this Blood booklet. Here-take
    all of these and you can learn what the Bible says .
    Q: Okay . Your husband says here that you
    don't believe in celebrating Christmas .
    A: It's right here in the Reasoning book about
    holidays . Just read it . If you celebrate Christmas, it's
    a lie. Christ was not born on December 25. We're not
    liars, so we don't lie to our children . I don't know if
    you lie to your kids, do you? I can't believe how
    people lie to their children . Did you know that
    Christmas gifts cause depression in children?
    Honest, direct, and nondefensive responses give a
    clear and accurate picture . The examiner does not
    expect that you have had a perfect life . Obviously, there
    have been some problems or rocky areas in your life.
    Therefore, you should feel free to talk about these
    situations objectively and with confidence . Here is an
    example to help you see the difference from the
    preceding interview :
    58
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    Q: When did you get married to John?
    A: I married him when I was just 19 years old .
    I was glad to get out of the house, and I really
    thought I loved him when we were married .
    Q: Oh, I see . And how long did the marriage
    last?
    A: We were married for 10 years . It wasn't a
    good marriage right from the start .
    Q: What do you mean by that?
    A : We were never close . I was young, and he
    was young . There was a lot of arguing and fighting
    about everything . When we had a child, things got
    worse. Neither one of us were ready for being
    parents, especially him .
    Q: And what do you mean when you said `he
    wasn't ready for being a parent'?
    A : For the first six months lie rarely even held
    Lisa. He would stay out late at night because she
    cried a lot . You know, I really think he loves Lisa
    now, but he rarely showed her much attention when
    we were together .
    Q: I see. And what brought about the end of
    the marriage?
    A: When he had an affair, I just couldn't take
    it anymore. He claims I drove him to it by becoming
    one of Jehovah's Witnesses . He was always highly
    critical of my beliefs and even became outwardly
    hostile at times . I think he was just using my
    religion as an excuse . When I wouldn't take him
    back, he wanted to get back at me by trying to take
    custody of my Lisa .
    Q: And why do you think he was so critical of
    your beliefs?
    A: Well, doctor, I'm not a psychiatrist, but I
    think he was insecure about my sincere and
    dedicated interest in the Bible . He always seemed to
    feel I would lose interest in him and not have
    59
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    respect for his opinions . He claimed I tried to force
    religion on him. But that's not true . He has the right
    to his own opinions. He claimed I was always going
    to meetings, reading the Bible, and talking with
    people about the Bible . You know, it's true that my
    religious activities occupied more of my time, but I
    feel I was balanced.
    Q : And what do you mean, you felt you were
    balanced?
    A: As one of Jehovah's Witnesses, I learned
    that I had to be balanced in caring for the needs of
    my family . I really tried to be a better wife by
    showing him more kindness and love . I tried to have
    the house cleaned and food on the table when I
    attended my meetings . I didn't neglect him as he
    claims, but rather, I improved . Unfortunately, it
    seemed that the harder I tried to be a better wife,
    the worse he got . It seemed that my being a better
    person was overshadowed by being one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses. I don't want to give you the impression I
    was perfect . I made my mistakes. But I really feel I
    tried.
    And I don't want to sound like he's all bad . In
    fact, he was a very good provider . Around the house
    he was very helpful in fixing and repairing things .
    You know, underneath his critical feelings about my
    religious beliefs, I always felt that he was very
    sensitive but he just couldn't show it . I don't love
    him anymore . But I do feel compassion for him . I'm
    really angry and hurt that he would try to get back
    at me by taking my Lisa and saying I'm a religious
    fanatic. You know, doctor, I really think there's more
    to it than just the religion .
    A court will be interested in examining your
    religious beliefs. A popular issue raised when one mate is
    not one of Jehovah's Witnesses is the fact that Jehovah's
    Witnesses do not celebrate holidays like Christmas and
    birthdays. You must be prepared to respond to this issue
    in an honest and direct manner . The psychologist will
    want to know whether your children are actually
    damaged or hindered by your religious convictions. This
    60
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    presents a fine opportunity for you to show that your
    religious beliefs are not detrimental to your child's
    well-being. Rather, when viewed in the proper
    perspective, comparing the love and affection you offer
    your child and the other opportunities for enjoyable
    times as a family, the lack of celebration of holidays
    such as Christmas and birthdays poses no serious threat
    to the child's well-being .
    Q: I noticed from the report your spouse claims
    you don't allow your child to celebrate holidays like
    Christmas and birthdays.
    A: That's true . We don't participate in these
    holidays because they're not accurately based on the
    Bible . For example, Christ was not born on
    December 25, but in the fall of the year . When
    viewed realistically, how could there have been
    shepherds in the fields in the wintertime? We believe
    that our children should not be told that Santa Claus
    exists when it's just not true . You know, I'm aware
    that my child might feel left out, so I make an extra
    effort to compensate for not celebrating Christmas .
    I'm not opposed to giving gifts ; in fact, I regularly
    give gifts to Lisa all year round . Arid more important
    than material things, I feel that I show Lisa a lot of
    love. I try to build a really close relationship with
    her by spending a lot of time with her . You know,
    doctor, my ex-husband claims that by not celebrating
    those holidays our child is going to be psychologically
    damaged . But if that were really so, what about
    the millions of Orientals and Africans who also don't
    celebrate these holidays? I just can't believe that
    they're going to be psychologically damaged by not
    celebrating Christmas .
    Q : Yes, that's true . You mentioned that you try
    to show extra interest and love to Lisa. Can you
    elaborate on what you do?
    A: There are many times when we just sit and
    talk. Lisa likes to come in after school and discuss
    her day with me . When she brings home a school
    project that she's really proud of, I try to stop what
    I'm doing and praise her . I also like to include her in
    61
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    some of the household duties like cooking, sewing,
    and things like that . It gives me an opportunity to
    teach her things . I really enjoy being with her . Also,
    I really try to build her self-esteem and encourage
    her in her artwork. You know, she really has
    potential. Sometimes she gets discouraged because
    she wants to do better. So I encourage her .
    Q: Yes. Very interesting . Is there anything
    else?
    A: Well, that's about it . Wait-there is one
    more thing. I do spend time studying the Bible with
    her. I feel it's important that she learn something
    about Jehovah God .
    Q: And what do you teach your child in these
    Bible studies?
    A: I try to teach her about some fundamental
    principles like honesty and why it is important . Also,
    we study about showing love to others, being kind,
    forgiving, and things like that .
    Above all, the mental health care professional will
    want to know what type of relationship you have with
    your child . You want to communicate the fact that your
    religious beliefs have helped you to become a better
    parent. You will want to show that a Christian parent is
    capable of providing for the emotional and physical
    needs of the child, as well as the child's spiritual needs .
    Take the opportunity to show that a warm, loving bond
    already exists between you and your child, so that any
    disruption to this bond will be detrimental to the child .
    The mental health care professional who is
    conducting the interview may know very little about the
    religious teachings and practices of Jehovah's Witnesses .
    Therefore, you will want to use language and
    illustrations that will help the examiner to clearly
    understand the lifestyle of a Christian . You will want to
    present yourself as one who follows the teachings of the
    Scriptures, not as one who is dogmatic and a slave to
    rules. By reasoning, help the examiner to see that the
    course you have selected is a course of wisdom and
    62
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    reason. The following dialogue is an example of how you
    might explain the fact that Christians attend five
    Bible-based meetings each week and are encouraged to
    devote additional time for personal Bible study :
    A: Well, Lisa generally comes with me . Our
    meetings are much like a classroom . We usually
    have someone giving a reading, a discussion about a
    Bible topic . We encourage all, young and old, to
    learn to really reason and think about a matter .
    Rather than just telling Lisa what to think, I
    encourage her to use her mind . As one of Jehovah's
    Witnesses, I feel that the Bible encourages us to use
    our God-given conscience.
    Q: Can you give me an example of that?
    A Yes. You know God tells us to show love and
    kindness. Let's say that Lisa - is out playing ball with
    another child, and she takes something that is not
    hers. I would reason with her about it, helping her to
    understand why it is wrong, rather than just
    punishing her or demanding that she be honest . It
    may sound simple, but as a parent, you know it is a
    very difficult process . I try my best.
    Q: Okay. And how often do you go to these
    meetings?
    A : We have five hours of meetings a week . To
    some, that may sound like a lot. But it's about the
    same number of hours a student would spend in one
    class at school a week . It's a relatively small number
    of hours if you think that there are 168 hours in a
    week. It's actually less than three percent .
    Like holidays and the celebration of Christmas,
    Jehovah's Witnesses' position on the use of blood is
    controversial and is often raised as an issue of contention
    by an unbelieving mate. You want reasonably to stress
    the fact that you are not opposed to medical treatment.
    Rather, as a sound, thinking person, you desire to have
    medical treatment for your minor child in the event of a
    medical crisis . However, because of the Scriptural
    admonition regarding blood, and the many serious
    medical dangers associated with blood transfusions, you
    63
    PREPARATION FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION
    want to show your reasonableness in the fact that you
    have already investigated medical alternatives to the use
    of blood . You should be prepared to talk about these
    alternatives in some detail, showing that you are capable
    and prepared to care for the child's physical needs :
    Q : As one of Jehovah's Witnesses you don't
    believe in blood transfusions, do you?
    A : That's true . Our position on blood
    transfusions is primarily a religious one, but we also
    know there are many medical dangers from blood .
    We take our position on this issue from various
    scriptural references, such as Acts 15 :28, 29 and
    Leviticus 17 :13, 14 . These scriptures point out that
    we should avoid the use of blood in our bodies . I'm
    sure you, as a doctor, are already aware of the
    potential medical complications that can arise from
    blood transfusions, such as hepatitis and AIDS .
    Because of our stand, some feel that we refuse all
    medical treatment . But this is just not true . We fully
    utilize medical doctors . In the area of transfusions,
    we do accept non-blood volume expanders such as
    saline solution, Ringer's lactate, dextran, etc .
    Perhaps you'd like to read about the medical aspects
    of our stand . I have a copy of an article that
    appeared in The Journal of the American . Medical
    Association on this question of Jehovah's Witnesses
    and blood transfusions . (Reproduced in the Awake!
    of June 22, 1982, pages 25-27 .)
    Doctor, you might be reassured to know that I
    have made medical provisions to ensure that Lisa
    will receive proper medical attention if and when she
    needs it. For example, I have a doctor who has
    agreed to respect our views on blood . Also, if an
    emergency should arise, I've made arrangements to
    have my child transported to a hospital with doctors
    that specialize in surgery on Jehovah's Witnesses .
    Q: Thank you. That was very interesting . I'll
    take the article . To be honest with you, I don't know
    if I'll have time to read it . But I'll certainly try .
    64

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