Formal vs Informal DA

by irondork 3 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • irondork

    In another thread, Morbidzbaby said:

    "Not interested" isn't really a DF'ing thing so much as a DA'ing in absentia (sort of the same, regardless, because of the way it's announced). But you didn't send it to an elder... Just a friend.

    I dunno, it's kind of a gray area, IMO. I've told my family I don't want it and I'm not interested... Not interested could simply mean "Not interested right NOW" in their eyes.

    Curious. During the time when I was still kinda going to meetings but had pretty much made up my mind that I was finished with the WTS, my mother happened to have a heart attack. A few days later I got an email from the cong. secretary informing me that Sister (my mother) was in the hospital, etc, etc... I was on his mailing list.

    I was feeling particularly fed up that day so I shot an email back to him telling him to remove me from his mailing list "and while you're at it, remove me from the membership files of your church, inform the royalty of Brooklyn and announce it publicly." He sent a response asking me if I was serious and offered to meet with me. "However, if this is your final decision on the matter, please send a letter in." - or something to that effect.

    I never responded to him for almost a year, during which time I was still kinda-sorta still attending meetings. (I felt there was still SOME spiritual food to be had there.) Also, during this period, no one (aside from the rank and file who didn't know what was going on) approached me to talk out what was troubling me or how to help. Besides, the elders already knew I was fed up with the harsh anti-gay slant of the organization.

    Finally, after having to walk out of too many meetings and a Circuit Assembly because of the anti-gay crap, I packed it up and sent in a formal letter of disassociation.

    THEN it got announced.

    Why this gray area? I hear of people getting DA or DF for the simplest things including just stating that they are no longer interested or that they disagree with this or that. They KNEW I didn't agree with the anti-gay doctrines when they reinstated me 2+ years earlier. I told them to their face in a committee meeting. Why did I have to go through such a formality to get out?

    At this point the answer doesn't really matter. I'm just curious.

  • hotspur

    Easy to answer - up until the time you disassociate or are disfellowshipped you are still a reportable number!

  • clearpoison

    You didn't follow their rules, remember he asked you to send a letter, e-mail won't do.


  • Octarine Prince
    Octarine Prince

    They had the "out" of you being under emotional strain during that situation. They could rightfully wait until you showed by your actions that you were "serious" about your decision. You were still attending, so how serious would they take it? Letter = serious.

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