Do you find yorself still helping others??

by lydia 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • lydia
    lydia

    When we were "in" we were often told how and when to help out "brothers and sisters". Now that many of us are "out" - do you find that you are still eager to help others in need??
    Or are you burnt out due to the amount of time being "forced" helping others before?
    I find that I want to help others Out of the BOrg...and those who are out who need help getting to know friends and others on the outside?

    Do you find that you sometimes have a hard time saying no?

    If so - why do you think this is ad if not - why not??

    Sorry - lots of Deep Questions are running through my mind tonight...

    Lyd

  • Celtic
    Celtic

    I guess your'e either a 'helping' giving person, or a taker, or perhaps neither, these genres were not just particular to WT teachings but cut across every sector of people where-ever you are.

    I love helping still, although prefer the expression enabling, but exactly what is that? It is assisting others to make decisions that are more socially responsible in their own right, leading them to enjoy more fulfilled, whole, meaningful lives, designed out of their own imformed choice decisions. Assisting others to accomplish upon set goals.

    There is no right or wrong to it, it is something which motive cannot be judged upon, as it usually stems radically from a persons own unique character make up, with no other agendas attached, it is just something that is done.

    Peace

    Mark
    * http://www.can-online.org.uk
    [email protected]

  • Mommie Dark
    Mommie Dark

    I'm always willing to help someone in need. The difference between cult life and post-cult life is that I no longer feel a need to crusade for some cause. If asked for help or advice, I gladly give it. These days though I am trying to learn to mind my own business unless specifically asked. Not always succeeding, but working at it.

    I don't need salvation and I don't assume others need it either. But if I have something someone else needs, whether material things or just plain comforting, I'll willingly share.

    It's good to not live under a compulsion to serve. Service has to come from the heart or it's pointless.

  • roybatty
    roybatty

    I find that I help people more then before leaving the JWs. This is because I no longer have this "us" against "them" feeling. Through the local YMCA and church my kids and I have done what I consider a lot of good for the community. Not in preaching to people, like we did as JWs going door to door and claim that this was the best thing for people, but instead helping people with their immediate needs. Isn't this also what Jesus did? Wasn't he moved to feed and heal people? When was the last time you saw the WT Society do that?
    Don't get me wrong, I'm no mother tareesa, but I do go out of my way more now to help people then I ever did before.

  • think41self
    think41self

    Hi Lydia!

    Good question. I will admit that when I first left the borg, I just wanted to withdraw and heal myself and my family. I didn't have any attention or time to spend on others. As we healed and became whole again, I began to think about helping others in some way. After our cult-like experiences, many of us do not want to belong to any "organization" again, even a charitable one, because we don't want demands placed on us. I help out when I can and when I am motivated to do it, not because I belong to some group and they expect me to show up for meetings or fund raising or anything...YUCK!

    I did find a group that I joined for awhile, it's called the Guardian Ad Litem program. I saw an advertisement in the paper for it. You go to court to speak up for the child in an abused, neglected or abandoned situation. You have to go through a training program, then you get an assignment to a child. You are not investigating the case or anything like that...your sole purpose is to visit the child, see if the place they're in fits their needs, and report back to the judge what the childs wishes are and what your recommendations are! It is a great program, doesn't require that much time all at once. I recently resigned for a short time though, because I was having too many court appearances that were happening during work hours, and I wasn't able to get the time off.

    Anyway, I hope I answered your question.

    think41self

    She had the vocabulary of a brothel owner specializing in service to sailors with Tourette's syndrome

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