Dad,s why did we raise our sons as JW,s ..Fathers not born in.

by jam 7 Replies latest forum announcements

  • jam

    In the 60,s-70,s before I became A JW, my life was wonderful. Sports in school,

    dating, parties all the normal things A teenger would enjoy. Why would I deny

    this to my sons when I became A JW. Many here was born in but in my case

    I knew what the world was about and it wasn,t bad. As A man you look forward

    too the day your son running down the football field or shooting the winning

    basket, running track, baseball or class President. Those memories of high school

    and college for me are great but for my son he told me it was the worst time

    of his life.

  • flipper

    JAM- Although I was a born-in witness, I get what you're saying my friend. Even being raised JW I wanted to go out and play on the high school freshman baseball team. I had some appreciable baseball skills- and the coach got pissed when I told him my parents told me " No " I couldn't join the team because of practices being on meeting nights. So there went some of my future blown up right then and there.

    As a father who raised a son in the witnesses myself until 18 when he exited the witnesses- I apologized to my son once I got out right after him in 2003. I told him I was so sorry raising him in a mind control cult as I didn't know any better , but hoped to help him out in college and be a free spirit now. We are closer than close. Outside of my wife, he's my best friend.

    I understand your regrets, but please don't beat yourself up too much over it guy, just try to make the best of what you have with your son now. All we have is the here and now, the past is gone. So make now and the future a good ne

  • Ding

    People do this to their kids because they think it's what God wants them to do.

    They think it's what God wants them to do because they have turned their thinking over to a group of fallible men who want to control every aspect of their lives.

  • jam

    Flipper you right, I apologized also to my son and we are close.

    The good part his son (15) plays sports, loves school enjoying life

    as A teenager. We made A commitment (my son and I) we will

    stop this cycle (JW), and his son my grandson will have A normal life.

  • flipper

    JAM- That is awesome you and your son are committed to giving your grandson a normal up and coming young life ! Good for you guys ! Right on

  • smiddy


    "We", like most of us here ,truly beleived that the WTB&TS/Jehovah`s Witnesses were the spokesperson for God here on earth in this 20th century

    So why wouldn`t we bring our sons and daughters up in a religion that would give them eternal life in a paradise earth? I did all I could to encourage my sons to be faithful and loyall to the organization

    Life teaches you otherwise

    Thankfully none of MY family ,except for a neice and her family are a part of the organization


  • jam

    smiddy; the same words I told my son when he ask me. We( the parent)

    believe it was the best way.

  • Big Softie
    Big Softie

    Just to add my 10 pence worth (English) my JW born and raised estranged wife and I had an agreement that our children would be raised religiously neutral as I'm not a JW. As you'll be unsurprised to learn, this wasn't acceptable to her elders and they put her under enormous pressure to bring the girls to meetings and to raise them as JW's and in the end it destroyed our marriage. This wasn't helped by my brother in law being an elder and my wife running to her sister and him whenever we had issues. I watched a beautiful person, full of promise disappear before my very eyes.

    2 years and 8 court appearances later we have joint residency and custody, the girls have totally rejected the cult and my wife is bound by the court not to involve them in any form of worship or religious activity for it. They are of course still trying to get the girls to accept her view of the world so its very encouraging to read that you guys have already been there and come out the other side.

    Thought the thread on the Elders guide book and mental illness was very good. I learned a lot, mainly that my experiences with my wife were not unusual.


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