Here we go again on a voyage of discovery through the swamps of Christinanity.
This time: Polka! Polka! Polka! A-polka-lypse!; those damn homos and their fashion sense; 666 is the number of salvation!; and you thought Dorothy and Toto were sweet? Think again!
Expatbrit
A-polka-lypse Now!
5000 Fishes is a "Christian resource company" dedicated to bringing "fresh suggestions for presenting the Gospel to the church and to the world," and they mean it. How's this for fresh? "Hans, Heinrich & Helga sing a bunch of contemporary praise songs at top speed (as polkas)" for a church presentation, then those loveable idioten indulge in a little teutonic Bible study. Yep, it's fresher than sashimi. http://www.5000fishes.net/polka_praise.htm
Christian Dior?
We all know the fashion design world is chock full of gay men. After all, what straight guy is capable of imagining women with clothes on for any stretch of time? Well, pastor E. L. Bynum also noticed this. In a sermon where he waxes Biblical on Versace's death, he says it infuriates him to no end that Christian women (and men, too, to a lesser extent) are wearing clothes that are at least influenced by those godless homos. He demands that there be at least one major Christian designer. http://www.llano.net/baptist/versacefashions.htm
I'm not the Antichrist, damn you!
He sees UFO's, he also has 666 on his driver's license. However, this guy isn't Satanic, he swears. He's actually a prophet. The UFO's are really helpful angels, and the 666 was a "desperate" attempt on Satan's part to discredit an agent of god.
Favorite Quote: "When I finally drop dead people will be able to look back on my life and say 'he never got around to marking anyone's head with the 666 mark of the beast.'" http://www.awitness.org/666devil.html
Follow the yellow brick road.....TO HELL!!!!
In the movie the Wizard of Oz, there were witches from the East, West, and North, so who was the witch of the South? David Benoit has hunted down the hidden hag, and she is Dorothy! The little girl lost was infused with ungodly magical powers and occult beliefs, while the film itself was part of an ongoing media campaign to recruit people into Wicca and Satanism (they're one and the same according to Benoit). Bewitched, the Care Bears and the Little Mermaid are some other accomplices. You might counter by saying, but some of those witches were villains, how did they bring people to Wicca? Benoit would tell you that negative portrayals of witches as ugly, evil beings are actually part of the demonic plot, so that people who see a beautiful witch will let their guards down for the brainwashing to follow. However, he goes on to say that another facet of this takeover, paradoxically, is the media showing Christians in an unflattering light. If David only had a brain... http://www.fillthevoid.org/Entertainment/14-things.html