I was raised as a devout Catholic myself, so I (sort of) understand the religious mindset. Not that I am foreign to sexual repression, but, don't you guys think that the idea of "remaining undefiled by a woman" is a very curious thing to hold?
I read somewhere that Origen emasculated himself so he could preach to the women without "risk". This says little in favor of the Christians in question. It suggests that the ladies would consent to sleep with him in a second, or, even worse, that he would force them to. I also have to wonder whether such a Christian man would hold that God made him with genitals so he could emasculate himself. And then, that "be fruitful and multiply" makes no sense unless men agree to be "defiled".
Jacob was certainly defiled many times, by several women, and that was one of the many ways God showed his blessings. Without that original defilement, alas, the House of Israel would not exist and we would have been denied salvation.
I wonder if the virginity that was so rigidly demanded from women has anything at all with "being defiled". Apparently, not, because there is never a mention of "being defiled by men".
A funny thought (funny in a wicked way) is that, while the Catholic Church at least nominally demands that their priests and nuns remain celibate, all others don't. Defilement, anyone?
Wouldn't it be better to just say "don't have sex outside of marriage" and end it there?