Does God Really Answer prayers?

by SeekingSanity 3 Replies latest jw friends

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  SeekingSanity

  My heart is sitting on my girlfriend. I absolutely love her to death and the idea of her not being with me is torturing me. We are having problems. She's not as 'committed' to me as I am to her. I don't mean she's seeing other people. She's very loyal. When I say she's not as 'committed' ...what i mean is marriage wise. She can't commit to anything. She's so scared of lying that she tends to not commit to anything and says 'maybe' to avoid being dishonest. She is absolutely amazing in my eyes though she has her faults too. (she can be lazy and spoiled at times). She has a good heart...saves insects from death. Gets mad when someone kills insects etc.. or Precious life etc..

  for the first time in my life, I feel like when i look in my own heart there is this ball ...thing...but it's not dark like evil or something. It's SHINY...and upon further examination of this...I see that it is desire ...desire of marriage with her. I feel as though something deep inside me has finally said to me 'I want to marry her, and no one else.' If I asked her to MARRY me...she would definately say no. She's not 'ready.'

  We argue...fight...we have our moments of clashing...but we're still together. Its not about marrage...just stuff. We cuddle a lot when we're together...we kiss...and all that jazz... I'm not very good with women because I get 'played' a lot. And she isn't doing that consciously. She sits and watches pictures of me when i'm not there.. She talks to me everyday... we spend hours on the phone. She gets upset and cries a little when I leave. (long distance relationship) ...I'm planning on moving close to her next month. i want her, ALL of her and I don't want my conscious to scream at me like i'm doing something WRONG. I want HER as my wife.

  I know that if i ask her, She'll say she's not ready...she still wants to travel the world etc.. And wants me to go with her. So my question is...Does God really answer prayers? we've been told all of our lives 'yes he does' ...but if that was the case then everyone would win the lottery.

  I pray for my relationship with her to work out. I've asked for her hand in marriage in my heart if permitted to God. I'm scared of the future. I don't know. I feel really weird. I would like to make this relationship SOLID.

  I prayed for God to show me how I can work on this relationship. And I had a dream, where IN my dream I was specifically AWARE that God was answering my prayer... There were a group of Four people around a table. All women. One was my mentor. My mentor didn't talk but the otehr three did. They told me a list of things to do...I want to say there was 7 things...give or take one or two. I remember writing them down in the dream...then I remember TRYING HARD to remember because I KNEW I was sleeping and when i woke up, I'd forget.

  So...i only remember two things..

  1)Solidify the relationship

  2)fool

  I don't quite understand the 'how' of number #1. I don't understand How to solidify it. and i dont understand number 2 at all. In the dream I wasn't offended in #2. I thought at first that it was with the idea of 'stop being so serious and start living a little' ....but when i'm ME ..i'm pretty SILLY.I dunno. How does someone solidfy the relationship? sexually? or....what? ...we've been together for more than a year now.

  I don't remember any of the other stuff.

  I'm about to hit 30, some may say that's still 'young' but...it is the time to get married settle....etc... I don't know what to do....im opening up the board for advice. Please lay off the negatives. I have enough negativity in my life.

  Advice?
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  mostlydead

  In my experience, the only way you will solidify this relationship is by accepting it as it is, right now. If it goes against your values to consider a sexual relationship without marriage, then you must accept the fact that, for now, that that's the way it is. You have to decide which you want more–to be married or to be with her. You'd be doing yourself a disservice to hang on indefinitely in hopes that she'll change her mind; it's possible she will, but equally possible she won't.

  It's really painful to be in love with someone who doesn't want the same things you want from the relationship. I think the only thing you could ask God for is the ability to decide whether to stay in this relationship exactly as it is now, with no expectation of anything further, or to get back some peace of mind and look for someone who wants the same things in their life as you do.

  I know it's hard. I feel for you...
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  WTWizard

  I would not throw the prayer dice. Because there is as good a chance that Jehovah Baghead will, out of spite and contempt, sabotage it on you and prevent you from getting together as of getting a better resolution and taking the credit himself. Better to rationally analyze the whole thing, and not letting Jehovah get any credit whatsoever.
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  agonus

  I think you're doing the right thing. It doesn't sound like you're a pray-all-the-time-Jesus-freak (not that I have anything against Jesus freaks) but some people abuse prayer as something of a weapon to get whatever they want. I think prayer, when done sincerely about really important life choices such as this, is entirely appropriate. And 'Jehovah Baghead" and God are not the same thing. Regardless of what "name" you attach to the Creator, if he/she/it is omnipotent/omnipresent, etc. he/she/it will hear you. The Dubs diminish God by saying He can only hear you if you use the name "Jehovah" (and let's face it, how can you be entirely certain you're not praying to some 'demigod" if you use a proper name rather than just God/Father/Mother/Parent/Creator etc.). Sincerity and a desire for God's will as well as others' well-being and happiness is all you really need.

  And if you feel God isn't answering your prayers, then it sounds like it's time for you and lovey to have a serious conversation.

  Good luck and God bless.