by Desilusionnee 6 Replies latest jw friends
I ask because I'm confronted to that and I really don't know what to do. I always pointed out that the bible and not the book we are studying together is God's word, but now I really don't know any farther.
The 2nd problem is that we don't only study the bible she is now a friend of mine, our children are of the same age? What should I do?
Were some of you in the same situation? What did you do? I'm open to your suggestions!
Desi
CAN ANYONE HELP PLEASE!!!
I'm just bumping it, Desilusionnee, I'm sure quite a few here have been in your situation and can give you good advice.
I found a woman out in field service who was a friend of mine before I joined up. She readily accepted a bible study which made me very happy because now I could hang out with her again! There was only one catch in that she didn't want to use a book, just the bible. What I learned during that time opened my eyes although the full impact wouldn't hit until years later. Yes I was already starting to have my doubts and brought that to the attention of one of my JW sisters. She said I should end the study as it was becoming spiritual poison for me! Just like that, my old friend was gone.
As to your situation, I don't really know what to tell you. It sounds like you're afraid that you'll lose a friend if you end the study. You could just tell her that you'd like to stop studying but would still like to be friends. This is the beginning of your fade.
I havent, but in my old congregation, years and years ago, I remember a prominent pioneer couple who "went apostate". They had several studies. They sat down with each study, explained what they had found and why they were leaving, and then left the organization. Not a single study continued (although a few in the congregation tried - but of course, the questions that had been planted - the elders just kind of gave up on them and didn't really encourage any ongoing studies. Also, the speed and zeal with which they were DF'd was kind of shocking to the studies). (I know this because my dad was an elder.)
I guess the question is - do you want to fade or just get out? How much "progress" has your friend made? The answer to those questions will really determine where you go from here.
I was, and I was quite honest with the study about why I was leaving. However, the indoctrination had been too deep already and so the study is still attending meetings two years later.
I did visit most of my return visits and told them "the truth". I am still friends with some of them.
You do need to be honest, but be cautious enough so you can cover your tracks. Drop in a few of your concerns, and tell them to research it for themselves.
Thanks a lot for your help.
I discovered the truth at the end of April and I'm still attending the meetings: trying to fade slowly as my husband is still convinced that it's the truth and we have 2 little girls.
The woman I study with attended the memorial and she wants to be one of the JW because she believes they are all good people. We are both from the caribbean and live in Europe. Not only the bible study connects us but also our cultural background somehow....
I'm afraid other brothers try to study with her if I stop and prevent her from having contact with me: she is the only caribbean woman I know in my area (south of Austria) and I like her much. That's why I'm so confused.
Once more, thank you very much for your help.
Desi
