THE COMMENT COULD BE MADE:
"I know this, COs have the power to either make you feel like a million bucks, wanted and used, or, by just one comment, ruin your day with a flippant remark, or ruin your “servant career” by being negative about you"
I was in charge of the circuit accounts - I had made an accounting error--- Our DO bro Cooke walked up to me with the Society's instructions on circuit accounting and right in front of perhaps 45 bros and sisters started to scold at me he took out a 6in plastic ruler and put it on the instructions sheet and said : "READ THIS, CAN YOU READ BRO JT!!!" The did this in front of my wife as well-- it hurt so bad but being a good Society man I told my wife that since the accounting was wrong I needed to take it as discipline from JEHOVAH
many of the friends who have known me for years came up to me to apologize for the DO and
my Wife said: "HELL NO!!!!!!!!!!"
I recall when I was at bethel a brother by the name of John Williams from the Islands "MON"
he told me : You should never Strip a man of his dignity
when I was an elder I tried very hard to not overburden the bro by telling them all the time to be balance -take the family out, we used to try and have bowling weekends, my wife tried to have a ladies night just for the girls
we always got shot down - I have read enough Bullshit about "Elders"
by those who have never Walked in my shoes
as if All elders all were looking at: "How can I kick Sister Old's cane out of her hand so that she will fall down and bust her head"
I realized it was THE SYSTEM that prevented me from doing what I believed was backed up by god-
I didn't leave the org due to being Mistreated like I have seen and read and talked with others over the last 5 years
I left cause I saw so many others being mistreated and I realized there was not a DAMN thing I could do- I could not beat the SYSTEM
during the intermission my wife and I talked about- we could not let the DO get away with what he had done to me
my wife asked me are you prepared to lose some of your "P"s esp on the convention level
I told her it was the principal
I have always lived by a simple rule when I have dealt with any in the Congo and I used to tell the bro this is how we should deal with each other
many times a bro or elder would say something that hurt the feelings of others, but I would in the end like I did in this case come back to the bottom line
'Would Jesus have done that, would he have spoken or dealt with someone like that"
as I stated I tried to say it was needed discipline from jah but I could not get away with knowing that Jesus would have never spoken to me that way and not in front of all my friends and wife
so I would tell the friends don't make excuses for elders if they say or do something- just ask yourself the question
would Jesus have done that?
AND IF THE answer is no then you know that you are right and the bro is wrong regardless of his title
so I walked into the DO office Scared to Death
and he was writing something and never looked up and said :
"you wanted to see Me"
I told him yes it was in ref to what happened in ref to the accounts and he said well as long as it balances out by the Sunday no problem
I told him is was not in ref to the books but to the conversation that we had
I started out by telling him I realize that we are all under pressure with parts and talks and getting all our paper work in order and that sometime it can get to the best of us.
but I didn't feel that the way you spoke to me in public is the way Jesus would have done it.
he stopped-- put his glasses on the table and I knew my A$$ was Grass-- then he apologized for his conduct and that he should have known better, etc
I left feeling great, but it was just another straw on the camel's back- in fact by the next circuit program I had given up that assignment cause we were on our way out.
So not all elder are proud,unloving and power hunger – some of us actually thought we could make a difference in folks lives- only problem was the instructions we were given were just no good