How Wonderful

by dearone 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • dearone
    dearone

    An elder in my hall gave an experience of why it is so vital that we do not speak to disfellowshipped ones. A sister who was disfellowshiped was of course not able to speak with her daughter or see her grandchildren. It was difficult for the family to 'adhere to bible principles' but in time the mother/grandmother missed her family so much she returned to the truth.

    I sat there listening to this and wondering does no one else hear what is being said and how ridiculous it is. Of course she wanted her family. It was obvious from this illustration but yet heads are nodding in agreement because this is such a 'loving' thing that helps ones to come to there senses.

    I'm in that boat right now I continue to go because of family, but I hate it. Sometimes I get emotionally sick just thinking of attending and have to reason with myself so that I can make it through yet another meeting. How sad.

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    Giving a talk like that about 4 years ago was my own personal light bulb moment.

    I got TONS of compliments afterwards about what a great job I did. Only then did I realize that I had just clubbed my last baby seal.

    It's truly a warped "tough love" that JWs convince themselves is God's will.

    om

  • BabaYaga
    BabaYaga

    Open Mind said:

    Giving a talk like that about 4 years ago was my own personal light bulb moment.

    I got TONS of compliments afterwards about what a great job I did. Only then did I realize that I had just clubbed my last baby seal.

    Wow, Om! Just wow.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Emotional blackmail and holding family hostage makes for some resentful worshippers.

  • Magwitch
    Magwitch

    It was explained to me recently that disfellowshipping is like time out for a naughty child (what great depth)

  • ana_dote
    ana_dote

    the funny thing with all of this is that it has absolutely nothing to do with repentance or whether a person believes it to be the truth.....

    If the organization stresses the importance of ZERO communication with df'd family members....then OF COURSE they're going to feel horrible and want to be able to have their family back! "do as we say, or we're going to take away everything you love....." and then they dangle it in front of you like a cookie. Having relations with family shouldn't be because the society says so. All it teaches the df'd person is that if they want to have their family back they have to reject their own God-given free will and rejoin the cult. It's disgusting.

    my best friend growing up has been df'd a time or two and is currently still df'd. She told me some story about how at the recent CA her oldest brother (uber spiritual, bethelite for 20 some years but left to find a wife and pioneer...hardcore stuff) passed her some note asking if she wanted to go meet up during the session to catch up a little. She told me that he said he wanted to give her a hug but wasn't sure that would appropriate. WTF!?!?!?!?! Where on EARTH are these stupid little rules coming from?!?!

    I understand the concept of removing a "dangerous" influence from the congregation. BUT SERIOUSLY??? She's a 28 year old single mother of 3 still living with her parents. I don't care if she is a drug addict or something like that, how on earth does SHE pose a threat having THREE children that she obviously wants to raise within the congregation??? PLUS, if he's already going to meet up with his sister to talk (which, by the way, he hasn't even spoken to her in almost FIVE YEARS she said), why the hell can't they friggin HUG??? That is your flesh and blood FAMILY.

    It's just completely ridiculous. Too many man made details that clog up the principles of God.

  • its_me!
    its_me!

    I agree with how ridiculous this is. It promotes wrong motives. All it succeeds in doing is showing how LITTLE love there is within this organization. Time out for a kid? Give me a break.

  • poopsiecakes
    poopsiecakes

    silly rules that have nothing to do with love or anything that Jesus (whether you believe in him or not) espoused.

  • Heaven
    Heaven

    I wonder what the failure rate is of this particular method.

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